Disloyalty- the quality of not being loyal to a person.
I walked into the bathroom, looking at myself in the mirror for the second time just at dinner. I feel like...I look ugly. I think I'm showing to much cleavage and I keep thinking my hair is messed up and I just feel out of place all together. I sighed and leaned against the counter, putting my head in my hands. I'm just ugly and I'm going to have to deal with it. My fucking scars is in plain sight and Ive seen some people staring as I passed by. I don't even know why we came out tonight..I'm ready to go.
That girl he brung with him is annoying the shit out of me. She's dingy as fuck and she talk to much. She's a very very very beautiful girl tho. If only he could just super glue her mouth shut, it'll be all good.
Someone knocked on the door twice before walking straight in. "Someone's in here!" I turned around quickly but soon realized it was James. "Chill ma, it's only me. I came to make sure you were okay." I frowned, still stunned from the idea of someone walking in on me. "I-I'm fine. Why didn't Chris come?" I turned back to the mirror and stared at myself, messing with my hair. "He uh, he's busy. Let me talk to you right quick tho." He approached the sink and grabbed onto my forearm. "James ima be honest, I-" He held his finger to my lip and turned me around, standing in front of me. Okay now I'm about to beat his ass. I smacked his hand away and pushed him. "Get out, and fast before I fuck you up James." I held my finger up. He smirked and chuckled, approaching me again. "I'm glad you out the house, lookin all fine and shit. This was my plan the whole time if you couldn't see." He pinned me against the sink with his body and put his head in the crook of my neck. "Off!" I tried pushing him away again but he held his ground. "I didn't take kindly to you playin me after that night we fucked. Once I laid it down on you, you became mine." He slid his hand down my arm, to my waist, gripping onto me. I began to shake slightly once I realized he was dead ass serious and wouldn't let me go. Flashbacks from the night with Don in the hotel room kept flashing as he touched me.
I feel disgusting...
"You don't ever, EVER-" He wrapped his hand around my throat and yanked me closer to him. "Ever, play me. I truly felt for you in your situations but that was an act too." He began laughing and shaking his head. My eyes watered and I started sniffing uncontrollably. Someone knocked on the door quickly before it swung open and everything unfolded so quick.
Mion came in first and was soon pushed out of the way by Chris, which grabbed James off of me by his suit jacket and slammed him to the floor. Chris wasn't letting up off of him with blows straight to the face while he tried to protect himself. I stood in the corner of the bathroom, in shock and speechless, Mion tried to break them up by pulling Chris's shirt and yelling 'stop!'. Chris (out of reaction) reached back and pushed her off of him, causing her to fall into the door. Some other people came rushing into the room and eventually broke them up. "Aye you better watch your fucking back!!" Chris yelled while trying to get to him again but the two employees held him tightly. Mion helped James up and he was bleeding from his lip and nose. They pulled Chris out and away and I quickly followed behind them. Everyone was staring as they escorted us out. Once we got outside, they tossed Chris away to the ground.
"The cops will be here any second if you don't get out of here hoodlum!" "No! No! We're leaving!" I grabbed Chris up quickly and practically ran off to the car. We got inside and Chris slammed the door, breathing hard. "B-Baby I'm s-sorry." My hand shook as I tried to reach for his face but he smacked my hand away. "It's not yo fault man, I swear that nigga is a dead man walking because I'm killing him. Oh he fucked up so baaad." He shook his head and started the car. I just sat back in my seat and kept quiet.
I always seem to be the reason something bad happens around me. I slouched down in my seat and silently cried with my face near the window. Just when things was starting to look normal for me.
"This shit is ridiculous...nigga was pretendin to be cool with me for my girl...I got something for that ass." He nodded while staring straight head. I don't want him to get caught and end up in trouble for this. I understand he wants retaliation because James really pulled some fuck shit but I can't have him taken away from me. I started crying harder, causing me to sniff uncontrollably. The idea of having him away from me and in jail just....makes me wanna pull my hair out. He pulled in front of the house and put the car in park before cutting it off. We sat in sil- well more of he sat in silence and I sat there crying. I don't know what to do to prevent this from happening to me, I literally just be being me and a scummy, stupid ass man wants to take my innocents away from me.
"Ssss." He touched on his jaw and looked in the mirror. He mumbled something under his breath before getting out of the car and slamming the door hard, causing me to jump. He's not even going to..okay. I sat in the car for another twenty minutes, trying to collect myself enough to make it into the house before I got out. This stupid dress needs to come off and my feet hurt. This night turned to shit and I'm surprised I haven't tried to kill myself yet, haha.
I walked inside of the house and closed the door, locking it. He was sitting on the couch, slumped down with a bottle of liquor in his right hand. I stopped in my tracks and stared at him for a couple of seconds to see if he was going to say anything but he didn't even acknowledge me. Great.
I went to my room and closed the door, locking it and stripped down out of the stupid red dress. I took the heels off and threw them across the room, causing a bottle of lotion to fall on the floor from the dresser. All this dumb ass stupid ass shit is pissing me off now. I went and took a hour long shower. I scrubbed my skin until I turned red but no matter how much scrubbing I did, I couldn't wash away the nasty feeling that lingered over me.
Do I need to be gay? Do I just need to leave humans alone period? I swear I can not take another person putting their hands on me and violating my body in a way I do not want. See, if I would've died when I was given the fucking chance, I wouldn't be in this situation. 'you shouldn't say things like that' fuck you okay, FUCK YOU. Nobody could ever feel me when I say I am genuinely tired of being treated like a fucking object. I AM A HUMAN BEING THAT HAS EMOTIONS!!!
A couple knocks on the door knocked me out of my Ted talk in my head and I just looked at it. Now he wanna be bothered with me after he done got drunk and shit. "Senia, open the door." He knocked again. "No leave me alone!! You didn't want nothing to do with me then, don't want nothing to do with me now!" I said as I got up from my spot and unlocked the door. My sucka ass. I swung the door open and there he stood, leaning against the frame and looking dead at me. His eyes were slightly glossy and I could smell the liquor on his breath.
"You cool? The water was on for a long time." "Why? It ain't like you care." I rolled my eyes and walked away from him, but was pulled back by my shirt. "Aye calm all that smart shit down." He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder. "Put me down!" I smacked his back a couple times but of course I was still there. He tossed me on the bed and towered over me. He had his suit shirt unbuttoned half way, which had his chest showing. His jaw was slightly bruised but it wasn't completely noticeable. "What are we going to do about these niggas Senia? I don't like them touching what's mine and I know you don't like them touchin you either. This got my name allllllll over it." He grabbed my leg and put it on the side of his body. "Do it?" I questioned, raising my eyebrow. He sucked his teeth and yanked my leg, making my body jerk towards him. "Let me show you it do." He wiggled his eyebrows, smirking.
I don't feel like it..but then again I miss MY dick. I'm just a confused ass bitch. One minute I'm sad and crying about something, then I'm mad, now I'm horny. Maybe I need this to take my mind off of everything.
Open wide, here comes the train! Cho Cho!
*********
He planted small, soft kisses up my stomach, to my breast and up to my lips, giving me a nice, slow, passionate lip lock for the ending of our head session. His body pressed against mine, the lights dimmed down low with some slow music to keep the mood flowing.
Four play always heightens the sex to a tenth power. It's like a appetizer to the sex. I'm ready to get my back blown out now. I slid my hand across his jaw, remembering to be mindful of his bruise and pulled away from his lips, looking him in the eyes. We stared at eachother for a good minute before jinxing ourseleves. "I love you." We blurted out at the same time but laughed immediately after realizing. We too deep at this point. We calmed down laughing and he began kissing on my neck while speaking. "You got me all hot from that throat." I smirked to myself and licked my lips, pushing him back so he could see me again. I made eye contact and spoke in a low tone. "I want you inside of me." I slowly began to wine my hips against him and grabbed onto my own boob, biting down on my bottom lip. My momma raised a top grade, lifetime achievement award freak.
He sized me up with this 'look' before swiftly flipping me over onto my stomach. I felt a hard smack to my ass before I was pulled up by my waist. "Spread it." He smacked my ass again and I almost nutted on myself. Lord I love when he's demanding. "Yes daddy." I fixed myself on my knees and leaned back over, making sure that my stomach laid flat against the bed while having my ass fully tooted in the air. Arch is on point and I'm ready. Break me in half! Put that shit in my guts! I felt his hand lay on my waist and the other held onto my ass check, squeezing it until I began to feel the tip tease against me. I started whining and waving my hips back and forth slightly. "Come onnnnnn!" "My pussy, my time. Shut up." He smacked it with the tip and slid all the way inside of me at once, without a fair warning, none of that. I gasped and went forward alittle, woah woah woah. I feel like a virgin again. But that feeling left with a quickness. He started beating my shit until my legs was out of commission and I couldn't even make it to the bathroom without help.
Needless to say,
One dick appointment a day keeps the attitude away.
-management