Knott's POV
"Why can't I find them?" I mumble to myself as I pull out the drawer on my nightstand. "I was sure I put them in here after P'Tum's wedding." I stop when I see what is in the drawer. So this is where he stashed those. Sitting on the bed, I pick up both boxes.
One for me and one for him. One for him? Huh?
"I think I need to explain the ins and outs of this before we go further."
Is it arrogant of me to think I wasn't going to be the one receiving? Tew has yet to have this ins and outs talk with me. I tried to talk to him that night, but he just avoided it then, and every time I brought it up after that. Tew should get an award for his ability to lead conversations away from things he doesn't want to discuss. How I ended up tutoring him on a subject he won't take until next year is beyond me.
"Knott, are you ready?" Tew asks, walking in. He looks at what I am holding and comes and sits down by me. "Knott?"
"I was looking for cufflinks," I explain.
"Those are not cufflinks," Tew chuckles, taking the boxes from my hand, "Any reason you are looking at these?"
"Just wondering," I shrug.
"Knott," Tew leans on my shoulder, "You can ask questions. I won't make fun of you." I have been asking.
"Why did you get a box?" I ask, "Are we going to take turns? Not to be an ass, but I thought I would be top."
"I got the ones for me, so if we ended up in a situation, I didn't want to make a mess," Tew explains. "Sometimes, it is just easier than cleaning up."
"Oh," I hum, looking at the boxes. "Why did you avoid the ins and outs convo you promised?"
"I was feeling awkward," Tew grins, "After I went and talked a big game, I felt shy when it came time."
"Are you avoiding sleeping with me?" I ask. My heart drops when he flinches ever so slightly.
"Can't say no," Tew lays back on the bed.
"What scares you?" I lie back and look at him.
"Getting hurt," Tew sighs, turning to look at me.
"Do you think I am going to hurt you?" I reach across and stroke his cheek.
"Not on purpose," Tew places his hand on mine, "There are just too many things in play. You were straight until you met me. You are the only son of a fairly prominent family."
"My family is not that important," I interrupt.
"Knott, I know who you are," Tew frowns at me, "And that scares me. I don't think you would intentionally hurt me, but if it came down to choosing between your family and me, I know who you would choose."
"So was this is over before it even started," I say, throwing my arm over my eyes. "Who I am will never change. Ai'Bright told me I should never have started this if I was going to break you." I take a ragged breath. "But I think I am the one that is going to break."
"Did I say I want to stop? Have I run away?" Tew sits up and slaps my chest, "I don't want to give up."
"But you don't want to move forward either," I accuse, sitting back up. "Tew, I don't know what I would choose if my parents gave me an ultimatum, but I do know you are the last person I would want to hurt. So if you have reservations about us, maybe we should take some time off."
I can't believe the words that just came out of my mouth. That is the last thing I want to do. Why did I say this? I just gave Tew an out. Shit! We were going out on a simple dinner date. Dinner! How did we end up here? Why does my heart feel like it just died?
"Time off," Tew repeats, "Do you really mean that?"
"NO! I don't!" I shout, standing up, "But I don't know what to do anymore, Tew. You are uneasy and don't know how to stop that. Not knowing how to set your mind at ease bothers me. As your boyfriend, it is my job to make you feel secure. Isn't it? If I have to let you go as a lover and keep you as a friend, so you are at ease. I will do that."
"What if your parents tell you to stop dating me?" Tew asks, looking down.
My parents know, and they have even asked for me to bring Tew home. I don't know why he is still afraid they will make us break up. It is all the ex-boyfriend's fault. Tew finds it hard to trust in our relationship since that ass treated him like that.
"I would not tell you that were a mistake or an experiment," I kneel in front of him, "I would fight for you. I have never gone against my parents' wishes, but for this, I would. I told you before you are not a phase or a whim. You are the person I love most in the world."
"And if I don't want to have sex?" Tew questions.
"All sex or just all the way sex?" I ask, trying to clarify. I am a healthy boy after all.
"You know what I mean," Tew chuckles. "What if I am not ready to use these yet?" He holds up the two boxes.
"They can stay in that drawer," I shrug, "You said it was good to be prepared. But I still need that ins and outs convo. I hate not knowing."
"Tell me why you haven't googled this yet?" Tew asks, and I feel my face get warm. "Nevermind. After dinner, we will talk."
"Come on," I say, standing up and holding out my hand, "Let's go. We have reservations." Tew stands and takes my hand. Leaning over, I kiss his forehead and smile. Reservations? What a word.
Wad's POV
"Hello?" I answer my phone, "This is he. I understand. No, I have nothing to say. Please refrain from contacting me. If you call again, I will contact my lawyer and find out what I can do to ensure that you don't." I hang up and throw my phone down on the bed.
This trial is getting messy. Now the papers from back home have started to contact my mom and me. Why would they think I want to talk about it, much less have it splashed all over the papers and news.
"Another one?" P'Prem asks behind me, making me jump.
"Shit, Prem!" I shout, grabbing my chest, "Make some noise!"
"Sorry," P'Prem apologizes as he walks over and picks up my phone. I watch as he unlocks it, blocking the number that just called. "There. At least they will have to use another phone if they want to talk to you."
"Like that will be hard," I grumble, turning back to the closet, "Prem, what should I wear. You said you made reservations. What kind of place is it?"
"Nothing fancy," P'Prem walks over and wraps his arms around me, "It is just a small place, and they fill up quickly." He kisses the back of my ear. "I only made reservations, so we didn't waste our time going down there." He points at a shirt. "I think that with your black skinny jeans will be fine."
"Oh, ok," I say, taking the shirt from the closet. "When do we need to be there?"
"In an hour," P'Prem says, looking through the closet, "But we need to leave soon. Traffic is going to be a pain." I smile when he takes a black and white striped pullover out along with a pair of black skinny jeans.
One thing I have learned living with P'Prem is he likes stripes. From boxers to shirts. I look down at what he selected for me. He picked a simple over-sized white shirt for me to wear with my jeans. Walking back over to the closet, I begin looking through his shirts.
"Do you not like the outfit?" P'Prem asks as he takes his shirt off.
"I like mine," I answer as I pull out an all-white shirt in the same style as the striped one. "Wear this one." I hold it out for him. He looks at the shirt on the bed, and at the one, I am holding.
"OK," P'Prem smiles, handing me the other shirt as he takes the new one from me. "Happy?"
"Yep," I smile as I head into the bathroom to change. I am no longer self-conscious about my scars, but I have found out if I change in front of P'Prem, we tend to get off task, and we have a reservation to make.
"Spoilsport!" P'Prem calls. I can hear him laughing through the door.
We are waiting to be seated when I notice a couple of girls looking at P'Prem and me. I look down and then over at P'Prem. Why are they staring at us? We aren't dressed weirdly. Although I do notice we are dressed alike. I smile, thinking we dressed like a couple. I am so glad my friends haven't seen us. I can hear Aim and Oak now.
"P'Prem," I whisper, "Those girls are looking at us."
"Huh?′ P'Prem turns, "Which girls?" I tilt my head in the direction of the girls and see them both wave at us.
"Do you have reservations?" One of them walks over and asks. I look up at P'Prem.
"Yes, we do," P'Prem smiles politely.
"Where are your dates?" The other girl joins her friend smiling up at me. Personal space, woman! I take a step closer to my boyfriend.
"My date is right here," P'Prem answers putting an arm around my shoulder. I snap my head up and gape at him before I look around at the people surrounding us. I can't believe he did that in public, but it doesn't stop my heart from fluttering.
"You could have just said you weren't interested," the first girl pouts. "Like you would two would be dating."
I turn and look up at P'Prem, smiling. Before I can stop myself, I lean up and kiss him on the cheek. After which, I quickly bury my face against him. What was I thinking?!? I can't believe I was that bold.
"You were saying," I hear P'Prem laugh as several people behind us gasp and some whistle.
"Reservation for Noppachorn?" A hostess calls. I have never been so happy to hear P'Prem's last name in my life.
"That would be us," P'Prem grabs my hand, "Have a good evening. Better luck next time." Some of the other couples in line laugh as we walk past the stunned girls to enter the restaurant. My boyfriend has a mean streak, and it is hot.
"P'Prem," I tug on his hand. He turns, looking at me, and smiles. I remind myself I should stop giving Kong shit about going all gooey when his boyfriend smiles at him. I can totally get why he does.
"Come on," P'Prem tells me. I follow behind him as the hostess leads us to our table and seats us.
"I wish we didn't have reservations," P'Prem leans over and whispers in my ear, "I want to eat, but you are not on the menu here."
I feel my face flame. I know I am blushing to the tips of my ears. I grab the glass of water the waitress has just placed on the table and drink as I fan myself. I should find those girls and thank them for setting off my boyfriend, nothing like a mean streak and possessiveness to turn him on.
I am trying to decide if we should ask for our food to go or not when I spot a couple at another table.
"Did you tell anyone else about this restaurant?" I ask P'Prem looking around at the other tables.
"Ai'Knott suggested it. Why?" P'Prem asks, looking at the menu.
"No, reason," I say as I watch P'Knott and Tew get up from the table and walk out. I can't put my finger on it, but something is wrong with those two.
"Wad?" P'Prem calls, and I look over at him.
"Huh?" I blush when I see him smiling, "What?"
"She wants to know what you want?" P'Prem motions to the waitress standing by the table. When did she come back?
"What did you order?" I ask P'Prem as I start to read the menu. He leans over and points to what he ordered. "That looks good. I will have the same." The waitress smiles at me before she walks away.
"You know I was tempted to ask for our food to go," P'Prem admits once we are alone again. I stop myself from laughing. We are so alike, sometimes.
"Why didn't you?" I ask, grinning at my boyfriend.
"Because it is nice just to be on a date," P'Prem reaches over and takes my hand. "I want to enjoy it."
"You do this every time," I mumble. "How do you make me fall in love with you day after day?"
"I could ask you the same. Because that is what I think every morning I wake up next to you," P'Prem tells me. How can he say these things with no reservations whats so ever?
2223 8-31-19
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