{Grief is the price we pay for love- Queen Elizabeth II}
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Clara's brain clicked to consciousness, waking up from a very magical dream. The loud chirping of Neverland's birds awoke her from her deep slumber. She nuzzled her head into the pillow hoping she can fall asleep and continue the dream but after a few seconds she knew she had lost it forever. Falling back asleep again was a struggle so she decided to reluctantly open her eyes, letting the sunshine in. She was sleeping on her side looking at the window that just showed long trees and the blue sky since her tree house was pretty high.
Too lazy.
She pulled the covers over her head and scrunched herself together out of natural instinct to try and fall asleep once more.
Why even try.
She slowly sat up in her bed and stretched her arms and legs out like a starfish. The only motivation she had for getting up was the utter hunger she was feeling.
With that Clara quickly got off the bed, freshened up, then made her way out the tree house. She quickly stopped in her place as she shut her eyes tight, the sun blinding her eyes for a second, contrasting the darkness from inside the tree house.
"Good morning" A recognizable voice called out. Clara paced her hand on her forehead to shade the sun away and look at the person who just spoke. She released a quick smile at the sight of Pan as the memories of last night came back.
"Good morning" she said back.
"You are awake early. It is only 2 in the afternoon" Pan joked as he crossed his arms.
"Ha-ha very funny" She mimicked his pose by crossing her arms along with him.
With that Pan gave Clara quick wink before leading the way to the bonfire, eventually sitting on a log with her next to him.
"Fruits?" He asked as he extended a plate of berries for Clara to take. Clara gave Pan a quick smile before grabbing a grape. Before she placed it in her mouth, she watched as Pan threw the grape in the air then eventually landed in his mouth.
I want to do that she thought.
With that Clara threw the grape in the air and opened her mouth wide to catch it. To her luck the grape ended up landing on her forehead then bouncing to the ground. It was then Pan released a loud laugh at her failure.
I never heard him laugh before
"Shut up" Clara said jokingly as she grabbed another grape and tossed it in the air once more. This time the grape was not even close to her face.
"Stop trying Cupcake, you are wasting food" Pan said through laughter.
"And you are a waste of oxygen" she said as she grabbed a handful of grapes and tried once more. Unfortunaly every single grape in her hand ended up landing on the ground.
"Watch and learn" Pan said as he stood up from the log and tossed a grape in the air. It landed perfectly in his mouth as if he was a pro at this.
"Whatever" Clara mumbled under her breath. With complete jealousy she stood up and snatched a grape from the bowl. She threw it high in the air as she opened her mouth as wide as she could. It was then the grape landed right in her mouth. Clara fisted her hands in the air victoriously as she chewed on the fruit.
"I DID IT. SUCK IT" she teased as she flipped Pan her middle finger.
"Yes, I can see love" Pan stated with a smirk, "After wasting over ten grapes" he hinted to the grapes she dropped.
"Whatever" Clara said as she flipped her hair with sass.
"Hold on" Pan said as he raised his index finger in the air to signal Clara to wait. "JULUIS" he called out loud. With that Clara turned around to the direction Pan was looking at to find Julius approaching them. She couldn't help but release a quick smile at his sight.
"Julia" she called his nickname as he got closer.
"Clark" Julius said back as he stood right in front of Clara. With that the two jumped in the air and pumped chests together, as if they were wild boys from a fraternity house.
"Julia? Clark? Really?" Pan said with confusion as he looked between Clara and Julius.
"Do you want one? Pan-deta?" Clara said nicknaming Pan.
"Oh god" Pan scuffed, "don't call me that" he stated. "Anyways Julius, I need you to go and pick out some dreamshade" Pan ordered.
Oh god, not dreamshade.
"When?" Julius asked.
"The sooner the better" Pan stated. With that Julius gave Pan a quick nod and Clara a quick smile before turning around and walking away. Once he left Clara picked out a handful of grapes and shoved them all in her mouth at the same time.
"Are you part raccoon?" Pan joked as he watched Clara chew on the fruit.
"Thee bou yater" Clara said with a mouth full of food. Pan did not understand a single word she said. With that Clara chewed at a fast speed before swallowing down the fruit.
"See you later" she said much clearer before as turned around and paced to where Julius was walking. "HOLD UP" she yelled behind Julius. With that he stopped in his pace and turned around to face Clara.
"What's up?" he smiled.
"I'll come with" Clara invited herself.
"You sure?"
"Ya, I want to see what a dreamshade plant looks like" Clara stated. With that the two turned around and began heading towards the camp's border. But it wasn't too long till they were interrupted.
"Where are you guys going?"
The two turned around once more to find Felix approaching them with curiosity.
"Dreamshade" Julius stated.
"And I am just coming with" Clara said.
"Cool, I am coming with as well" Felix said.
"What's this? Anymore lost boys to invite?" Julius said sarcastically.
"Shut up" Clara said as she lightly pushed Julius, "We can be the three musketeers" she cheered. Felix and Julius exchanged odd glances at how lame Clara was.
Clara has recently gone fond of Felix, despite how bad their interaction went when she first came to Neverland. He became nicer to her, asking her how she is and if she needed anything. He also kept her company when she was sitting alone in camp. He also took her on some trips and showed her around Neverland. Clara never understood the sudden change in him but she wasn't complaining since every act of kindness is needed on this land.
Pan too became less of a captive to her and more of a...mate? They weren't friends, but he wasn't her tormentor either. Perhaps it's because of last night's incidents, or because of the magic finally taking its course and bringing the two lost
children back to their right path.
"The queen spoke" Julius states, "to the castle" he said sarcastically as he pointed towards the forest. With that the three began pacing towards the forest like the true three musketeers.
The path the three were walking on was soft beneath their shoes. Pine needles, dry leaves, and broken branches filled the ground. Julios and Felix were wearing shoes that they made here on Neverland while Clara wore shoes that she brought from earth.
The air smelled utterly clean as Clara took in a deep breath then let it out gently. She could never get tired of Neverland's woods. She was soaking in the forest's calm and mindful atmosphere through all her five senses, lingering throughout the walk.
Clara and Julius were messing with each other as if they were immature siblings while Felix simply led the way in silence.
"At least I don't look like an ostrich" Clara joked as she ruffled Julius's hair for the third time during the walk.
"You know what?" Julius said.
"Enlighten me" Clara spoke.
"If I cut out a little of my hair and glued it on your chin" he said as he cupped Clara's chin to resemble a beard, "you would look like Ibrahim Lincoln" he laughed.
"Screw you" Clara laughed as she bent down and grabbed a handful of dry leaves. She proceeded by immediately throwing them at Julius's face.
"Oh my eyes" he said dramatically, "I am meltingggg" he acted out.
"You're not hot enough to melt" Clara winked.
"Oh please" Julius sassed as he stood in his place. He rested his weight on one leg as he placed his hand on his hip while moving a hand through his hair. He was pretending he was a model.
"Oh my god, can I have your autograph? " Clara begged as she sarcastically fangirled.
"On one condition" Julius said as he stood tall like a king, "Sit on your knees and beg"
"Oh please" Clara scuffed as she continued in her pace with Julius following. "So Julia" she sang.
"Yes, Clark?"
"How's the weather at your side?" She asked casually.
"Hot, extremely hot. Probably because there is a hot chick right next to me" he winked. Clara was just starting to blush till Julius continued his sentence. "Felix, my hottie" he joked. Clara couldn't help but burst out laughing at the idea of Felix being called Julius's hottie.
"Is he a thot?" Clara asked going with the joke.
"Sometimes he cheats on me with Pan" Julius stated, "I cry a river and then use it to plant him flowers"
"Lame" Clara teased as she lightly pushed Julius. "Speaking of flowers, when are we going to reach the dreamshade field?"
"Why? Wittle baby getting tired?" he baby talked Clara.
"Yes in fact" Clara snapped before she quickly jumped on Julius's back. She quickly wrapped her arms around his neck as he grabbed her thighs tightly. He knew exactly where this was going.
"You're too heavy for a piggy back ride" he joked as he pretended he was struggling with walking.
"Because I carry around all your bullshit" Clara joked.
"Touché" Julius stated, "Hold on tight."
With that Julius began running circles all around the area and Felix with Clara on his back. Clara released a loud woohoo as she felt like a kid again. In a second she fisted her hands in the air as if she were flying.
"I AM PETER PAN" She joked out loud. Julius immediately cracked a laugh at her ironic joke. He stopped in the middle of the run and jumped to push Clara up and get a better hold of her.
"Where to miss?" Julius asked pretending he was a pilot.
"TO FELIX-VILLE"
With that Julius took off running towards Felix and began running multiple circles around him. Both Julius and Clara couldn't help but laugh like two children in a play room.
"Guys, quit messing around. We have dreamshade to collect" Felix stated. He didn't sound annoyed but he didn't sound amused either. With that Julius put Clara down then they both shrugged to one another their shoulders in confusion.
"Party pooper" both said in sync. With that Clara stepped away from Julius and began walking next to Felix.
"You're awfully quiet" she stated. Felix looked distressed, perhaps jealous? Was it because of how close Clara was being to Julius?
"Let's just focus on what Pan asked us to do" Felix stated. He was obviously not in the mood to talk.
"Alright" Clara sighed in annoyance, "Why are we getting dreamshade anyways? As far as I am concerned not long ago Pan almost died from it" she stated as she shivered from the memory in her head.
"For battle" Julius who was now leading the way said, "Incase the pirates or anyone else trespasses or decides to declare war on us, we are always on step ahead with this poison" he explained.
"Ya" Felix agreed, "One scratch even the size of a paper cut and you are a goner. We need that kind of power" he stated.
"Isn't Pan already a walking power" she asked with curiosity.
"Yes but the more the better" Felix stated.
"Has anyone other than Pan survived dreamshade" Clara asked.
"Yes actually, one lost boy" Felix stated.
I thought dreamshade was incurable.
"Who?" She asked curiously.
"Lucas" both Felix and Julius said at the same time.
"And how did he survive the poison?" Clara wondered.
"You ask a lot of questions" Felix joked.
"Let her" Julius defended, "she's just curious" he said as he turned around and gave Clara a quick smile. "Anyways, Lucas accidentally scratched his index finger when he was picking out dreamshade. He acted out quickly and basically cut his finger off, right in time before the dreamshade spread" he continued.
He cut his finger out?! Are you serious right now? That's completely gross. I would have probably wrote my well and accepted my death. Then again, losing a finger is better than losing your life.
"And how far are we from the dreamshade field?" Clara asked. She was no longer excited to go picking dreamshade.
"We are closer than you think" Julius stated. With that Clara immediately froze in place as she watched both Felix and Julius head into the direction of a flowing river. She watched as Felix stopped in his pace while Julius proceeded walking to the edge. It was then he backed away a couple of steps and launched at the river, jumping in the air in the process. In the right time he caught a hanging rope and used it to swing to the other side. He landed perfectly steady like a gymnast as he let go of the rope causing it to swing back to its original state.
He released a breath of relief before turning around and raising his eyebrow at Clara.
"Come on" he said signaling her to do the same he just did as though it was as easy as walking. With a gulp of fright, Clara hesitantly approached the edge to take a better look at the river below. She moved her head to examine the flowing water filled with multiples rocks all around. The wind blew her hair away which reminded her how high the swing would be. Her breath hitched in her throat before backing away a step. There was no way in hell Clara would do that. She doesn't know how to swim so if she fell, she would have fallen to her doom.
"N-o, it's fine" she hesitated as she crossed her arms and moved her head left and right as a no. "You guys go ahead, I'll wait here" she said as she moved her gaze to Felix and gave him a reassuring smile.
"Are you sure about this Clara?" Felix asked, "We can drop you back to camp-"
"Come on, Clara" Julius said a little loud so she can hear him but Clara assured him she wasn't going to jump.
"I can't swim" she stated as she cracked her knuckles from nervousness.
"The river isn't that deep" Julius assured as he took a quick look at the river. "And I can guarantee you it is safe. It's been holding on for centuries. As long as you hold onto the rope, you'll be okay"
"That's alright, Julius" Felix said, "I'll wait here with her, you go and grab the dream shade-"
"No" Clara quickly snapped, "I am not a baby; I can wait here by myself. You two go and get what's assigned" she stated.
"Come on, Clara" Julius teased, "Are you...scared?" He said testing her. A vein popped in her neck as Clara immediately raised her eyebrow for she was about to throw a sass bomb on him.
"Excuse me?" She said with attitude.
"You heard me" Julius smirked. Clara knew what he was trying to do.
I am not scared, I am not weak.
"Screw you" she sighed as she began approaching the edge in order to swing.
"Yo Clara hold on" Felix said as he held her arm, "Julius she can't swim and it's her first time, let's not risk it" Felix stated to Julius.
"It's fine" Clara said as she moved Felix's hand away, "I want to do it" she stated.
"Are you sure, Clara?" Felix asked with worry. His eyes begged her to not do the jump but Clara was determined to prove the boys she was not weak. Clara released a quick smiled as she nodded in agreement.
"I am sure" she stated. She knew Felix was not happy with her swinging above a flowing river but who was he to stop her? He simply gave her a quick nod before backing away from her to give her the space to jump.
"Hit me with your best shot" Julius sang pretending he was Pat Benatar. Clara couldn't help but laugh at how high he made his voice sound so he could sound like a woman.
"Okay watch and learn Julia" Clara sassed, "You're about to get schooled".
Clara extended her neck a little to take a look at the hungry river once more. She was frightened to do this jump, but she was determined to prove the boys wrong. Besides Julius assured her it was safe, all she has to do is hold on to the rope.
Once Clara finished examining the sparkly river, she moved her gaze up and stared blankly at the rope that moved gently from the breeze.
Okay, come on Clara. You can do this. This is just a rope, Come on.
Clara took in one last breath before she backed away a couple of steps so she can have enough space to launch.
Run, jump, then grab, that's alright. Simple. Come on, it's easy. Are you ready? No. Whatever, you don't have a choice.
Three
Two
One
JUMP
With that Clara launched at full speed towards the river and inches away from the edge, she jumped like a kangaroo and extended her hands to grab the rope. She released a scream of fright that continued as laughter once she grabbed the rope and began swinging back and forth, her hair flying around from the breeze caused by her fast speed.
She couldn't stop laughing as she swung back and forth multiple times. Felix released a sigh of relief that soon welcomed a smile. Julius on the other hand clapped and cheered for Clara as he watched her enjoy the time of her life.
One last swing and Clara had let go off the rope causing her to land next to Julius. She expected herself to land like a pro but she ended up landing on her buttocks.
"THAT WAS AMAZING" she yelled with happiness as she stood up, not bothering to pat her pants. "DID YOU SEE WHAT I JUST DID?" She said as looked between Julius and Felix with utter happiness.
"I am quite impressed" Julius said amazed.
"Told you I am not scared" Clara said as she pushed him lightly.
"Ya ya, I take it back" he said as he raised his hands in surrender.
"Come on Felix, it's your turn" Clara said. "What? You're not scared are you?" She teased.
"Honey" Felix scuffed as he positioned himself ready to launch, "I have done this a million times before" he assured before launching at the river and jumping to grab the rope. He released a loud cheer as he swung to the other side and landed next to Clara and Julius.
"Like a pro" he said as he raised his hands in the air pretending he was holding an award. Clara and Julius exchanged odd gazes before laughing at how stupid Felix looked. They soon enough clapped for him as if they were the audience.
"again" Clara said as excitement grew inside of her.
"Someone found a new toy" Felix said as he ruffled her hair.
"Shut it" Clara said with sass as she fixed her hair.
"Well the queen gave us orders" Julius said to Felix. Felix nodded to him in agreement and it was then Julius launched at the rope once more releasing a loud woohoo in the process.
The three lost children spend the next fifteen minutes taking turns swinging back and forth on the rope. They were having utter fun. The boys always saw the rope as just a way to get to the dreamshade field, but Clara showed them how fun it truly was.
"MOVE" Clara yelled as she pushed Felix away so she can take his turn. She moved back a couple of steps and just like before, she launched at full speed to the river. She jumped right in time and it was then her hands grabbed the rope.
"WOOHOO" she yelled as she couldn't help but feel alive. The adrenaline was increasing rapidly as she felt free and happy. She did not want to stop. She swung back and forth as she felt such a rush.
The breeze around her got stronger by the second. That did not make any sense to Clara for the swing was slowing down. So what was causing the wind all around her?
It was then she saw something black quickly fly around her like a tornado. Her happiness was immediately replaced with worry, what could that thing be? She looked straight ahead to find the black shade fly right towards her with piercing glowing eyes. Fright immediately took over Clara as she accidentally loosened her grip on the rope and slipped. Her breath hitched in her throat as she saw the river under her get closer to her. She released an immediate yell that was muffled when she hit the water.
"CLARA" Julius yelled before he and Felix examined the river hoping Clara would resurface. Unfortunately the two were out of luck as a hint of red began appearing. It was as if someone had put red dye in the overflowing river. The two knew what it was; Clara's blood. She must have hit her head on a rock.
It didn't take two long till both Julius and Felix jumped into the river hoping to save Clara before she flows away in the river to the end, where the river turns into a waterfall.
Now that all happened around noon, but why did the sky suddenly turn pitch black as though it was nighttime?
Pan was sitting in front of the bonfire in camp as he watched the sky turn into a charcoal black. He usually controls the day and time in this land but this time it was not his doing. He stood up from his place as began examining camp to try and understand what had happened.
It wasn't too long till he winced from sudden pain on the left side of his forehead, as if he had a cut. But once Pan placed his hand on his head, he only felt soft skin.
A strong field hit his chest causing him to tumble a little. The feeling came from behind of him, as if he has been hit by an arrow for on the back. He quickly turned around to see the source only to freeze in his place.
He saw Julius approach him with Felix standing next to him. But the sight he couldn't ignore was Clara who was bleeding from her head unconsciously in Julius's arms. The three looked utterly wet, as if they had just showered in their clothes.
Without second thought Pan ran up to the lost children and stood inches away from Julius since Clara was in his arms. He was close enough to notice Clara was actually conscious but obviously struggling to stay awake. Pan wanted to speak, to know what happened, but something whirled inside of him. He opened his mouth to speak but no words came out. He raised his head and looked between Julius and Felix hoping he'd get answers.
"Heal her, quickly" Felix panted. Without second thought Pan extended his hands and held Clara from Julius. He walked up to a log and placed her on it. He placed her in his arms as a hug before using every magic source in him to heal her. But before the wound could vanish, he noticed the cut was on the left side of her head, the same place Pan felt pain on his forehead.
Once the spell ended, Pan felt a slight relief. Even though he had fully healed her, Clara was still under the effect of the impact. She was utterly weak and barely awake.
"GET ME SOME BLANKETS" Pan yelled as he noticed how fast she shivered. She felt icy cold in his hands. A bunch of lost boys ran up to Pan and handed him multiple blankets. Pan took one forcefully and wrapped it around Clara, hugging her in the process. He began rocking back and forth while holding her on the hope she would warm up quickly. He knew she was falling in and out of consciousness for how her head would tilt back every now and then.
He placed his forehead on Clara's head before accessing her memories to know what had happened.
River
Rope
Fall
Rock
Blood
Once Pan understood what had happened, he raised his gaze up to Julius. His adrenaline rose in a second as sudden anger rushed inside of him.
"WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TELLING HER JUMP WHEN SHE CANT SWIM?" Pan yelled as he let go off Clara and stood in front of Julius and Felix. By now Clara was lying on the log for she didn't have the strength to sit up all by her own.
"Pan-"
"YOU STAY OUT OF THIS" Pan yelled interrupting Felix. "ACTUALLY NO, WHAT DID YOU DO WHEN CLARA SAID SHE'LL JUMP?"
Before Felix could speak, Julius immediately interrupted him.
"It wasn't Felix's fault" he said taking all the blame, "he tried to stop me but I encouraged Clara to rope swing" he stated.
"No, Julius-"
"It's fine, Felix" Julius interrupted.
"So, you're willing to take all the blame?" Pan sneered as his eyes began turning pitch black and black veins started appearing all around his body. Julius knew what was coming next.
"Yes" he said as he realized he had no choice. In a second the sound of crier haunted everyone. Pan's eyes quickly went back to normal as he moved his gazed to Clara who was having an utter breakdown. He quickly paced to her and sat next to her on the bed. He helped her sit straight up and it was then he wrapped his arms around her and began rocking back and forth.
"It's okay, it's okay" he repeated in assurance as he stroked her hair. He took care of Clara as if she was a child. "It's okay, you're safe now, love" he repeated. "Shhh shh" he said as he continued stroking her hair gently. The lost boys looked at Pan in confusion at how considerate and caring he was being. This was a first. Once Clara quieted down, Pan laid her back on the log then stood up.
"Take her to her room, Felix" Pan demanded, refusing to take his gaze of Julius.
"Pan-"
"NOW" Pan echoed. With that Felix walked up to Clara and held her bridal style. He gave Julius a quick nod before walking away and disappearing into Clara's tree house.
"You're a threat to Clara" Pan stated as he began approaching Julius with sudden pitch black eyes, "and all threats must be eliminated" he stated.
He almost killed her, he almost killed my Clara. No more.
"We are all alone Pan, so let's cut to the chase" Julius spoke as though he was finally letting everything out. "I am not a threat to Clara and I know you know that, correct?"
"Yes" Pan answered, ignoring the fact he lied and said he was a threat seconds ago.
"And I know my fate is sealed but tell me, why?" he asked hoping he would finally get some answers.
"You were clumsy and although you didn't intentionally hurt her, I cannot risk having you be clumsy one more time" Pan answered. Julius stayed quiet for a while, trying to take in everything one last time.
"Alright" Julius sighed as he knew where this was going, "just tell me if she will be okay" he said hinting to Clara.
"I fully healed her" Pan assured, "she'll live"
"I mean from you" Julius states, "Make sure Clara is always happy" he said without second thought.
In a second a dagger flashed in Pan's hand and at the speed of light Pan moved his hand across Julius's neck, slitting his throat in the process.
Julius began backing away unbalanced as he placed his hand around his bleeding neck. He released chocking noises as his eyes began traveling around with loss. His body felt both heavy and light at the same time as he felt the wound pressure slowly fade away. It was then he dropped dead to the Neverland's ground, his blood damping the ground beneath him.
As Pan watched Julius's body drain out of blood, Clara was laying on her bed with utter discomfort. Felix had already left her a while back, in time to see Julius's body drop dead.
Clara was feeling utterly dehydrated and unlike a couple of minutes ago when she felt utterly cold, she was now extremely hot to the point where she wanted to rip her clothes off. Her muscles were cramping as she felt completely disorientated. Her ears felt dull as a high pitch ringing noise filled her head.
"Pan" she called out gently. She thought she was speaking loudly but her voice came out as a whisper. She was all alone in her tree house and her voice was barely heard, of course Pan wasn't going to show up.
"Pan" she said once more as she rolled onto her back with utter pain. She felt major pressure in her head which caused veins on both her neck and forehead to pop out.
"PAN" she finally called out loud but even that wasn't high enough to bring Pan to her. She tried sitting straight up in order to go and meet up with him but instead she fell back into her mattress. She did not have the strength in her hands to even push her off the bed.
"Pan" she repeated once more as she felt herself slowly drift away. She was feeling utter fright. She was all alone in her tree house at the darkest hour of the day; she did not want to be by herself.
"Pa...n" she barely let out as she knew unconsciousness was going to welcome her any second now.
"P..." She finally whispered as she let out a breath of fright. She gave up on calling Pan; she did not have the strength whatsoever.
A sudden heat wave showered her that snapped her from fading into unconsciousness. Pan.
"I am here" he said as he was suddenly in her room. He paced towards her bed and sat on the edge of it, Clara still lying on her back. She faced the ceiling as the veins showed more and more. Her eyes were still shut for she felt utter exhaustion.
In that second Pan placed his hand on Clara's head and began stroking her hair gently. She did not flinch or whatsoever, in fact she calmed down. She gulped in the fright that was by now replaced by safety.
"Pan" she whispered so lightly for she sounded like she was dehydrated and her mouth was utterly dry. "Pan" she repeated as she gathered up all the strength she had and used her hands to sit straight up. At her attempt she opened her eyes with a struggle. She felt like her eyelids weighed a thousand tons. She fully managed to sit straight up even though her back was slightly arched from exhaustion. She brought herself closer to Pan and rested her head on his chest before wrapping her arms around him. She wanted him to hug her and he knew that. So without second thought Pan wrapped his arms around Clara and squeezed her tighter to him, rubbing her back for comfort in the process.
The two were sitting silently on Clara's bed as Pan focused his senses on Clara's steady heartbeats. They felt mesmerizing to him.
"You should rest" he stated. Clara nodded once before letting go of the hug. She moved herself closer to the pillow and rested on it, sleeping on her side so she can face Pan. Pan on the other hand stood up from the bed and walked up the room door. He opened it and took one step outside, his back facing Clara. In a second he turned around to face Clara and leaned on the side of the doorway.
"Are you going to stay there?" She asked hinting to Pan who was standing boldly by the door.
"It's fine, I will guard you for the night" Pan stated.
"You don't have to stay there" she stated.
"It's alright, I don't mind-"
"Please don't stay there" Clara interrupted, "Come closer" she finally let out as quiet as a whisper. Pan heard her clearly. He was already crossing him arms together, but he crossed them even tighter at Clara's words. He couldn't help but feel both tense and light.
Did she trust him enough to fall asleep next to him? Was she putting her full trust in him enough for Pan to not hurt her?
"Do you really trust me enough to have me stay next you while you lay unconscious? You trust me that much if even at all?"
Clara did not release a single word, instead, she just nodded her head as a response.
Without second thought Pan walked a step into the room and shut the door. He then proceeded by pacing towards the bed Clara was laying on. It wasn't too long till he bent down and sat on the edge of the bed, eventually lying on his side. He was lying on his left side while Clara laid on her right side so the two can face each other.
Clara had basically admitted to Pan that she trusted him with her life, even while she is asleep and completely vulnerable. But confusion couldn't stop showering Pan. Why would she trust her tormentor with her life? And this leads to Pan staring into Clara's eyes hoping to find answers. After all the eyes are the window to the soul and by gazing into one another's eyes, the two are just proving mutual acceptance and curiosity. Unfortunately the eye contact stopped as Clara shut her eyes to rest. But that did not stop Pan from staring at his lost girl.
Clara looked beyond peaceful as her chest rose from the gentle breaths she took in. Innocence covered her like a warm blanket in winter. He couldn't help but stare at her in wonder. Wonder what would have happened if he hadn't healed Clara in time. Wonder what she could be thinking off at moment. Wonder how many times in his life he'll be lying next to her as she drifted off to sleep. But he couldn't mostly stop wondering at how he will be treating her in the future.
I can treat you better.
The protector instinct in him was always in rush at the sight of Clara, he feels the need to watch over her as if she is under his protection. How much importance has Clara achieved to Pan?
"I can feel you stare" Clara gently said right before she opened her eyes to lock eyes with Pan. Pan couldn't help but feel excitement at the sight of her sparkly eyes once more.
"It's just that" he trailed off not aware of what to say. He seemed utterly speechless "You're so beautiful"
WHAT THE HELL DID I JUST SAY?
Clara's breath hitched in her throat at Pan's words. Shock showered her face and he noticed it. Pan had complimented her for the first time even since she had arrived, that was one of the last things she expected from him.
"Thank you" she said as she tried fighting a smile. But Pan beat her to it for he smiled at her. In that moment Clara couldn't contain it and ended up smiling as well.
"It wasn't Julius's fault" she randomly let out. Pan's smile disappeared and he tensed up at the sound of his name. "It wasn't his fault" she repeated. "You were yelling at him but he wasn't to blame" she repeated.
"Of course he is-"
"No" Clara interrupted, "he isn't. I slipped-"
"He should have thought of all possibilities" Pan stated.
"I was holding on tight" Clara explained.
"Then why did you slip?" Pan asked with confusion.
"I saw something" she said as fright began filling her up. Pan noticed the fear in her eyes.
"What'd you see?" Pan asked with furrowed eyebrows.
"Umbra" Clara stated.
"The shadow?!" Pan snapped as he quickly sat straight up. Clara began sitting straight up slowly while nodding as a yes. "The same one from your nightmares?" Pan asked once more. Worry filled Clara as she saw how tense he was.
"It took me by surprise, I was terrified. I was distracted by it and I ended up slipping" Clara explained.
"Are you saying the shadow is real?" Pan asked as he fisted his hands.
"I don't know; it's not possible. It was probably just a hallucination" she stated.
"Is that why you broke down in camp? Because you were scared? And that's why I am here next to you?" Pan asked as he connected everything together. Clara bit on her lower lip nervously as she nodded in agreement.
"But that's not the point" she stated, "Julius is not the one to blame. You have to take it easy on him" she said sincerely.
But I killed Julius, Julius is dead. It is too late.
"He would never hurt me" she said once more, "Don't torment him" her eyes begged.
She already proved she trusts me with her life; I am not going to take that away. She can never know. She will never know.
"Clara" Pan said as he immediately cupped her cheek, "Julius is dead" he stated staring right into her eyes.
"What?"
"He's dead. He couldn't cope with the thought of hurting you so he took his own life away" Pan lied.
"W-w" Clara tried speaking but she just stuttered. "n-no" she said in disbelief as her eyes began filling up with tears and her nose turned red. "NO" she broke down. Immediate tears began effortlessly falling from her eyes as she made no attempt to stop the cries. Her hands began aggressively shaking as her cries echoed in the room. Pan immediately pulled her closer to him into a hug. She dug her face into his chest as her tears wet his shirt, muffling her cries in the process.
"But I-I-I-it wasn't h-h-h-his fault" she stuttered, "it w-w-w-wasn't his f-f-f-fault" she began repeating continuously. "It wasn't his fault. It wasn't his fault. It wasn't his fault-"
"I know that now" Pan said as he hugged her even tighter. Clara by now had fully wet his shit but no one really cared. Pan was trying his best to comfort her but nothing was working. Clara was still in Pan's arms breaking down.
"Thank you" she cried into his chest as she thanked him for being there for her. Pan simply rubbed her back as an it's okay.
She thanking me, the murderer, for sticking with the death of the one I killed.
The two stayed in that position for quite a long time. Pan kept on rocking back and forth with Clara in his arms as if he was quieting down a child. He would lightly run his hand through her hair every now and then, tracing patterns across her bare shoulder since she wore a spaghetti strap. He hoped she would calm down. Unfortunately nothing was working. He needed to fix this.
----------
The sun was by now rising on Neverland. It's about five in the morning as Pan sat in his thinking tree. He was still wide awake for he couldn't stop replaying the image of Clara breaking down in his head.
He had really messed up this time and he knew it. He tried fixing it but nothing worked. Julius was dead for more than an hour; it was too late to resurrect him. From now on he has to live with the guilt of killing Clara's friend.
Speaking of Clara, Pan stood up from the wooden chair he was seated on and teleported to the middle of camp. He made his way to Clara's tree house in order to check up on her. He left an hour or so after her breakdown for Clara had literally cried herself to sleep. Let's hope she was still unconscious.
Halfway through the stairs, Pan managed to hear the loud cries of his lost girl. Clara must have woken up. At her sound he quickly paced up the stairs and stood right in front of her closed room door, listening to her loud pain. He gently opened the creaking wooden door and took one step into the room at the sight of Clara.
She was sitting on the ground next to her bed, her back resting on the foot of her bed as her head rested on her knees that she was hugging to her chest. She obviously did not notice Pan for she did not react at his presence.
"I don't know what to say" Pan admitted as he watched her miserable state. Clara slowly raised her face to meet up with Pan's gaze. Pan immediately froze in place at the sight of her utterly moist face, puffy red eyes and black under circles.
"This isn't one of those times where words can help" she said with her voice that sounded like she had a cold. At her words Pan approached her and sat in front of her on the ground, placing his hand over hers in the process. It was then the sound of someone going up the stairs echoed. The creaking of the stairs stopped as Felix entered the room with worry.
"What happened?" He asked with slight fright as he worried something else might have happened. Felix was sitting in front of the bonfire when he saw Pan walk up to Clara's tree house. He decided to follow in case something was wrong.
Neither Clara nor Pan turned around to face Felix for they stated into one another with pain. Clara was struggling to silent her cries for whimpers accidentally escaped every now and then. Her whimpers brought ache to Pan's heart.
"How can I help?" Pan asked as he did not know what to do. He felt so useless and frustrated.
"You have magic" Clara stated, "Cast a spell on me" she let out.
A spell?!
"What for?" Pan asked with confusion at her odd request.
"I can't sleep" she admitted, "So use magic to make me pass out. Let me forget about this for the night"
Clara's words began echoing in Pan's head.
Forget
Forget
Forget
"I think I can do something better" Pan stated. Clara kept her gaze on Pan with confusion as to what his plan was.
"Do you trust me?" He asked as he rubbed her hand gently.
Trust is without a doubt a heavy load but at the same time it is utterly fragile. No, I do not give Pan my full trust, but for now...tonight, I am trusting him with everything.
Clara hesitated for a second but then nodded slowly as yes. With that Pan brought himself closer to Clara, noses almost brushing, then he cupped her face tightly. He bit on his lip nervously before he finally spoke.
"Forget him"
At this exact words Clara felt utterly paralyzed. Her pupils dilated and constricted at such a fast speed. Her fast heart beats quickly quieted down and her surroundings began fading away. His words tickled her ears as her pain began healing. The room was suddenly pitch black to her and the only thing visible was Pan. Her mind was being connected and melding with Pan's, as if the two were one.
"PAN NO" Felix immediately snapped.
"Stay out of this Felix" Pan threatened as his eyes were still locked to Clara's. He saw how Clara's eyes screamed for help and that just pushed Pan to proceed with the plan.
"Forget him" he repeated once more. His voice sounded like a whisper for it was utterly gentle; it was hypnotizing. "You don't know who Julius is. As far as you know he was a lost boy who was killed by a pirate. He means nothing to you" he stated.
At his word Clara's cries stopped leaving last tear droplets slide down her cheek. She stayed frozen in her place as she did not blink or react at all; she had a blank face expression on. She was practically staring at Pan's hypnotic eyes.
She was chained, imprisoned, hypnotized. In that moment she was claimed his. Pan had used magic to hypnotize Clara into doing whatever he asks and that includes forgetting every moment with Julius. The spell helped Clara reach out to her subconscious self. She felt like she was floating in an ocean of warmth. She was in a different state of mind that helped her relax and most importantly forget.
"Now sleep" Pan finally let out. With that Clara's eyes rolled to the back as she began leaning to the side unconsciously. Pan grabbed her right in time and carried her to her bed.
He placed Clara's unconscious body on the mattress before covering her with the warm blanket. He couldn't help but stare at her dry lips and fresh tears that wet her cheek. His lost girl had slept with a pained look on her face.
Once Clara was all tugged in, Pan backed away from the bed and turned his gaze to Felix. Anger was showering Felix but he was obviously trying to contain it.
"What'd you do that for?" He disgustingly asked.
"It's for her own sake" Pan assured as he began making his way to the door.
"And yours I presume" Felix said making Pan freeze in his place.
Yes
Without answering him back, Pan proceeded exiting the room leaving Felix and Clara alone.