The last couple of months have flown by. We are now back in Abu Dhabi for the final race of this year and it's going to be a very exciting one. Both Max and Daniel are still in the running for the championship with only a couple of points in between them. Daniel is 3 points behind Max. Which means if Daniel wins he will be champion, but also if Max ends up further down and Daniel becomes second he can still win. If Max finishes in front of Daniel, Max will be the champion.
Red Bull won their championship a long time ago. The two of them were so dominant this entire season that there was no other team that came even close.
I look at our daughter who is now 6 months old as she smiles at me from her stroller. She has been amazing every time we went with Daniel, she loves being around the team and everybody adores her.
She is developing so fast. She can sit up without anybody holding her now and she pushes herself on her hands and knees when she's playing on the floor.
As she smiles I see the two teeth she got last week in her lower jaw. It just makes her entire face looks so different. A lot less baby like. Her hair is starting to curl, so she definitely has Daniels hair. Her eyes are now more my color, the blue has gone completely.
We started adding some solid foods besides the breast feeding. Daniel and I decided to not give her jars of baby food. He kinda went off that when we did the taste test in Austria so many months ago.
For some reason Michael took it upon him to study what she can eat and he has been helping with the preparation of her meals every day. He does that for Daniel as well and now he loves making sure his niece gets the best of the best.
I told him more than once that he doesn't have to do that, because he works for Daniel not for me or Phoenix. But he just won't take no for an answer and to be honest she loves everything he comes up with.
To be fair she worships Michael, every time he's around her little face lights up and she starts to make the cutest sounds.
There's never a moment he can walk by without picking her up, the one time he did because he was in a rush, she was inconsolable until he came back and held her close. I sometimes think she loves him more than me.
Because she is in the paddock pretty much every race, the entire grid knows her well and everybody always comes over to see her, she has outfits from every team and as soon as she grows out of something they replace it.
Even Gunther Steiner is a fan of our little girl, but I can't blame him she always giggles when he pulls funny faces. Or just looks at her with his own face to be honest.
It's safe to say she has definitely got the entire grid with their teams that help raise her.
I know the saying is it takes a village to raise a child. But for us it is, it takes 10 F1 teams to raise a child.
So much has changed these last months.
Lewis and Brianna started dating during summer break and are now engaged. The wedding will be just before the season starts again. I'll be singing at the reception and when she walks down the aisle. She is in the Mercedes garage right now to support Lewis. I never thought she would be a WAG herself. To be honest I never thought I would be one either.
Jenna moved to Dubai for her work and she is now dating some miljonair over there. He's nice we've met him and they are here now as we are close to Dubai.
During the summer we went to Australia where Rain gave birth to a beautiful stallion. Every time we went to see the horses Phoenix was smiling and grabbing their manes. I think she's going to be a horse girl for sure, just like her mom.
I've been feeling sick all week leading up to today, I never thought I would have this much stress about it. I would be equally as proud whether Daniel wins today or not. But I know how much this means to him, if he makes it today he has proven everybody that he is still an amazing driver and that it was definitely not his fault that he couldn't get the results everybody wanted with McLaren.
Lando has been struggling all year, the McLaren is still only P8 in the drivers championship and I feel devastated for him.
I'm glad he turned to me to talk a lot, I hope I've been able to keep him a tiny bit positive, but I also know that he won't be able to keep it up much longer.
Yesterday was qualifying and Daniel starts at P2 with Max on pole.
I know they will fight, but I also know they will fight fair. Neither of them wants to end this season with a crash, especially not a crash that includes the both of them.
Daniel is in his room preparing, he is also very stressed out, he has put so much pressure on himself to win today, that it even caused him to lose quite a lot of sleep the last couple of nights.
Phoenix sleeps through the night nowadays, but now it was Daniel keeping himself and me up. So I'm exhausted, but I try not to show it too much.
Laura, Daniels assistant, comes up behind me.
"Skylar! Daniel is asking for you. I'll watch Phoenix."
I quickly kiss my girl on her cheek before making my way to Daniel. I trust Laura with our daughter, so I don't mind leaving Phoenix with her for a bit.
Without knocking I open the door of Daniels room where I find him pacing back and forth.
"Babe? You needed me?"
He didn't even notice me come in until I said something.
"Are you freaking out?"
I walk over to him and wrap my arms around his waist. At least he stops pacing now.
"I've never been this close to achieving the dream of winning the championship. It's like I can almost grasp it. But it's just out of reach. I don't feel like I'll be able to get it today."
The last time I've seen him this pale was after his accident when he fell with Buck.
"I understand, but you have to believe in yourself. Look at what you've accomplished this year. Like you said, you've never been this close. Last year there was no chance of you even thinking about the championship. I truly believe you can get it today." I run my finger over his cheek, through his stubble.
"But I'm starting second. Max is so good, I don't know if I'll be able to pass him."
"My sweet honey badger. You have done that more than once this year. You know you can, you just have to trust yourself. I know you can, the team has faith in you. You can do this. If you don't believe yourself, believe me when I say it."
His arms snake around me and he presses me against his hard body so tightly I can almost feel my bones crack.
"I couldn't have done it without you." He says with his face buried in the crook of my neck.
"Yes you could. But I'm glad I got to experience it with you. Now is there anything I can do to help you relax?"
He looks down at me with a cheeky grin, "there is something..."
"Not that, there's no time. But tonight, you're mine. After the party is over. Because there will be celebrations. Either for you or Max."
He sighs, "ok well then maybe a kiss if I can't get anything more for now."
That I can do right now. I bury my fingers in his curls and pull him closer. First I only brush my lips over his. Leaving him groaning and wanting more. Then I press my lips on his properly, pouring all the love I have for him in that kiss. I try to make him feel the faith I have in him and how much I believe in his abilities to win today.
There's a knock on the door, "Mate! It's time."
We pull apart and I smile at him, "go get em. This is your time."
Hand in hand we walk out of his room, towards the garage. When we get there Laura has Phoenix on her hip, bouncing her which makes our girl giggle with pleasure.
Daniel walks over to her so he can hold his daughter before he has to get in the car.
As soon as she sees him her eyes light up even more. Her little arms stretch out to him when Laura hands her over to her dad.
"Hey baby girl. Daddy has got an important race today, I really want to make you proud. I love you so much my angel."
After he gives her a kiss he hands her over to me, she starts to put her fists in her mouth, sucking on them. So I know she is getting hungry. Now is the perfect time to feed her because Daniel has to take the car to the grid. I still have about 30 minutes until it's lights out. So I quickly take her back to hospitality so she can drink.
With 5 minutes to spare we get back and I put her in the cot they put in one of the back rooms.
She falls asleep without any trouble, the team also got a babymonitor with a camera so turn it on.
She should be fine for a couple of hours and I really hope she sleeps through the race. Bradley offers to watch the baby monitor so I can focus on the race and I happily take his offer.
I take a seat on the pit wall with Christian, Thomas and some other team members. I think it's pretty amazing that they let me sit here, normally family watches from the garage.
I get a headset so I can hear everything that's been said over the board radio.
Daniel is in the car and the mechanics have to leave the grid so the formation lap can start.
My heart is about to beat out of my chest. This is it, the moment we have been waiting for all season. Who is it going to be, Max for the third time or Daniel for the first time. Kelly is also here as well as Daniels family. I know Grace is also dying inside a little, Joe seems calm , but I know he isn't.
One by one the cars take their positions on the grid. It feels like forever until finally Stroll puts his car on the last spot. He had engine trouble so he couldn't finish Q1 yesterday.
Aston Martin is second in the constructors this year which is pretty amazing.
"Ok this is it, today we will know which of the Red Bull drivers will be the champion of 2023. The lights are going on, this is going to be an epic race." I can hear Martin Brundles commentary over the speakers.
Everything moves in slow motion, I hear the engines roar as the lights go out and they accelerate over the long straight towards the first corner. Both Max and Daniel have a great start. Going down the straight into turn one they are neck on neck. They make the left turn still so close, but luckily there's no contact between them and they make it out safely.
I can't recall breathing during the first lap, but I must have otherwise I would have passed out already.
Michael is behind me and I can actually feel the tension radiating from him.
Both of us have our eyes fixed on the screens in front of us where we see Daniel is just backing up a bit to charge for another attack.
Max is keeping his car wide, so he definitely doesn't make it easy for Daniel, but Daniel has his fighting modus on so he won't give up.
"Oh my word, it feels like this is going to be a long race. I don't know how I'm going to handle watching it. I'm shaking so bad." I put my hands in front of me to show Michael how badly they are trembling.
"I know, but you will handle it and you're going to be there for Dan when he crosses that finish line. This will feel like the longest 1,5 hours of your life, I feel the same."
Lap after lap Daniel is chasing Max, they both started on softs and they manage to pull quite a gap between them and the rest of the grid.
"This might be the most intense race of the year, what do you think will be the outcome Crofty?" I hear the commentators.
"I find it hard to say, for now it seems that Max will win this, but Daniel is definitely not giving up. This could be his first championship and he does deserve it."
I smile to hear him say that. He sure does deserve it. The first pitstops are quickly getting closer and when Daniel comes in I look back to see him enter the pit lane, put his car in the middle of the mechanics that are ready with the medium tires.
They have an incredibly fast pitstop, only 2 seconds exact. Before I can blink he's gone already back to the track where he is now on P5, but the guys in front of him hadn't stopped yet.
The good thing is that he comes back within a second of George, which means he has DRS and that definitely helps in the gap that is between him and Max once Max will stop.
My stress level goes through the roof when I see Max, Fernando, Charles and George come in.
Again I look back to watch Max pit behind me. This time it only takes them 2,2 seconds to change his soft tires to the medium ones.
Daniel is coming closer to where Max will exit the pit lane.
"Oh please babe, come on you can do this."
I place my hands in front of my eyes, but I peek through my fingers.
Max is only a couple of tenth in front of him now, but on colder tires and Daniel gets DRS when they exit turn 5.
He overtakes Max with the help of the DRS, I cheer, but I also know the race is far from over.
The next DRS zone Max gets to open his rear wing.
He comes close, but not close enough. The next lap Max also gets the temperature in his tires, so it stays close for laps in a row.
Max tries, but Daniel manages to defend every single time Max wants to get besides him.
"I can't do this, I feel like I'm going to pass out." My stress level is sky high, just as my heart rate.
I know I really have to try to calm down, but it feels impossible.
"It's ok, he's going to be ok and so are you." Michael decides to wrap his arms around me, trying to give me some support and hopefully prevent me from really passing out.
Still Daniel is in front of Max, but Max stays within DRS range which is just so frustrating.
I know they both will have to manage their tires as well if they don't want to pit again. Unless there will be a rerun of 2021 where Latifi crashed near the end and Max came in for new softs while Lewis stayed out on hard tires.
So far there hasn't been a Safety Car situation and I don't know what would be best.
Then suddenly there's a yellow flag, I don't know what happened yet, but it doesn't take long before we can see Pierre who has crashed his car.
"This is going to be a safety car. They should pit him. Well both I guess." I mumble and I'm right, soon the safety car gets deployed and they decide to do a double stop, so both come in for new softs.
Daniel is first and again the stop is fast, then they have the second set ready for Max who had to wait because he was so close to Daniel.
Eventually when they come back out and follow the safety car, that doesn't matter anymore, because the gap that was formed in the pit closes again.
Two laps later the safety car comes back in and Daniel doesn't waste much time before accelerating again.
The positive thing for him is that Max now has to defend his position against Fernando who is now on his tail as well. But they won't have DRS for 2 laps yet.
Daniel is pulling a gap in between him and Max and with only 5 laps more to go things seem to go his way. But still, he has 5 more laps, nothing is certain yet.
4 laps to go, he's 1,1 second in front of Max, but Max has been able to pull away from Fernando after a lock up from the Spaniard.
"Come on 3 more laps babe, bring her home!" I don't have the radio on, so he can't hear me. The team had become silent as well.
In fact it feels like everybody is silent, all I hear is the engines of the cars when they drive by and in the distance. And my heart beating in my ears.
I realize there is still commentary from the Skysports team, but I can't hear a word they are saying.
In the corner of my eye I see a camera focused on the pit wall where Christian, the engineers, strategist and me and Michael are at.
Another camera is filming the garage where the guys are all on their feet, waiting for the cars to cross the checkered flag. Still 2 laps to go.
Max is in Daniels DRS again and I know what he's capable off.
I can feel tears burning in my eyes, I don't know if they will be happy tears yet. If Max manages to overtake Daniel I know how disappointed he will be.
I'm biting the tip of my finger nail, but Michael grabs my hand when we see Max coming closer again at the end of the second DRS zone.
They are both fighting to the limit and we see some smoke when they brake to make the corner.
"Oh god oh god what was that?"
"Nothing, they both had a lock up, it's all good, they are still driving." Michael tells me.
I feel so sick I really want to throw up, but I can't because that would mean I might miss something so I just swallow and try to keep it down.
Daniels POV:
Fuck I had a lock up, I expect Max to come by me now, but for some reason he doesn't.
My heart is racing out of my chest when I hear Thomas tell me Max also had a lock up, but I know he is still close.
When I look in my mirror very quickly I see him right behind me.
"Final lap Daniel, final lap, almost there." Thomas says over the radio, but I can't answer, my mouth feels dry as if I have swallowed tons of desert sand.
I have to stay in front of Max, but he is pushing like crazy. I would have done the same, but I'm so close now. I can't lose this.
My jaws are clenched as we get to the first long straight. I know he has DRS, but I managed to stay in front so far.
His front wheels are next to my back wing when we are almost at the turn.
I don't have a lock up now and we make it through together. His car practically in my gear box.
We almost go wheel to wheel through the next turns. I can feel the sweat pouring from my face, every muscle in my body is aching from the tension. He is behind me again when we reach the second long straight, but I can see his back wing open which gives him more speed.
I've never fought so hard during a race and I'm purely surviving on adrenaline right now.
I can't let Skylar and Phoenix down. I can't let the team down who believed in me so much to give me this change.
I brake maybe a millisecond later than Max, he's still right beside me through the next corners. He has to back off only the slightest to make it through the final corner, but he's there again when we see the fireworks begin, it's almost neck on neck, I can see the checkered flag waving, I look next to me and I can almost look straight into his eyes. Please tell me this won't be another photo finish.
We cross the line and for a second I don't know who won.
Then I hear my board radio come to life.
"Babe!!! You are the world champion. You broke the Bahrein curse! You did it! You fucking did it!" My girl, is on the radio telling me I just won. I can hear her sobbing and I feel tears running down my face as well.
"I am? Are you for fucking real!!?"
"She is for real mate, you've just won your first championship, you are champion of the world!" Christian confirms.
I can barely see where I'm going through the tears that are richly flowing.
"Oh my god!!! Oh my god!! Thank you guys so much for giving me this chance. Yeeeeeeeaaaaaaah!!"
I raise one hand from the wheel to punch it in the air. Max drives next to me while we do our cool down lap and when I look at him he sticks up his thumb.
"Babe I'm so proud of you, I knew you could do it. I love you so much." I hear my beautiful wife's voice in me ear again. I can tell she is still sobbing, but I also hear the pride and love in her voice.
"I love you too baby, I owe you so much. It's because of you I'm here right now. You're my world together with Phoenix." I'm almost at the finish again where Max and I will be doing some donuts.
"Well not just me and Phoenix anymore. I'm pregnant, you're going to be a dad again."
My heart stops beating for a bit, she's pregnant? We're having another baby?
"For real?! Are you for real?"
I can't believe it.
"Fuck yeah I'm for real, I'm definitely pregnant again."
"YEAH!!! Holy shit!! Oh baby I love you so much."
I know the entire world can hear our conversation as it is over the board radio, but I don't care. We're having another baby and I just won the world championship. After all these years of struggling with Renault and then McLaren. I almost gave up and I lost my love for the sport.
But thanks to a competition from McLaren, for one fan to win a tour through the MTC I met my soulmate. The one person who never stopped believing in me. Who loved me more than I've ever been loved before. She gave me all of her and more, she gave me our girl and now she's going to give me another baby. She has sacrificed so much for me. She left her entire life behind to follow me across the globe for my career.
And she did it without complaining, without a doubt, she dropped everything and came along for the ride.
And she didn't do it for the fame, for the money, for the prestige. She did it out of love for me.
Max and I line up and we start doing our donuts when I suddenly realize something.
"Next season is going to be my last, after that I quit racing and I'm going to be there with you baby. With you and our children."
I know the whole world has heard me announce my retirement. One more year and that's it. I'm done after that.
I've accomplished everything I ever wanted, I'll try to keep my championship next year, but then I'm done.