I patiently sat on his couch while I waited. I called 17 times the first 3 times he let them ring. After that he sent me straight to voicemail.
Of course I was pissed. I was also worried but more so pissed. I had such important information to discuss with him and he blew me off. Speaking of ............
•F͡L͡A͡S͡H͡B͡A͡C͡K͡•
"But why are you telling me?" I asked. I felt so many emotions at that moment. I was scared and confused. The last time I saw this girl she told me they found my moms body in the fucking river.
" Because. I have cancer and I'm not going to be able to take care of this baby. The doctors said it's early stage 4 but if we treat it now then there's a chance I might make it."
"So why not treat it." I stated. She looked down. "For me to undergo treatment I would have to terminate my pregnancy and I'm not doing that Roddy. I want this baby to have life more than anything."
I scoffed and shook my head. "Excuse me?" She crossed her arms. "It seems selfish to me. Why would you bring a child in this shitty ass world and not even plan to be there to guid them along the way." I took a swig from my bottle.
"See that's where you come in." I almost choked on my drink."Whatchu mean? For one you can't just push a baby on me, secondly you don't even know me well enough to trust me with your child." I said making a face.
"It's your child too and I do know you." I dryly chuckled. You don't know shit about me. "I know your pops used to beat on you." I froze.
"And I know you would do everything in your power to be a better father than him." She said looking into my eyes.
I looked down. "I-I gotta talk it over with somebody before I can give you da answer."
She lifted my head by my chin before wiping a tear and hugging me.
•O͡V͡E͡R͡•
I heard some key's jingle at the door knocking me out of my thoughts. I crossed my arms and made sure my attitude was present.
He walked through and looked me up and down. "How you get in here?" He asked as he walked past me. I scrunched my face. "You gave me a key."
He nodded as he drank some cold water from the fridge. I rolled my eyes. "Where were you and I know you saw me calling you."
He shrugged. "My phone was on dnd. I was busy." He said pulling me by my arms closer to his body. He seemed upset about something.
"But how are you." He kissed my forehead. "I know what today is for you. I'm sorry I wasn't here." My heart warmed at that. But I still came here for a reason.
I backed out of his grip. "I'm fine but um I came here to talk to you about something." He looked me up and down and crossed his arms leaning on the fridge.
"You wanna sit down and talk about it or you wanna stay standing?" He asked and I nodded. He started to walk to the couch as I followed him.
Ion even know how to say this. "When I was around 16 I donated to a sperm bank and now this girl I knew when I was little told me she was pregnant with my baby. But the thing is she can't take care of it cause she sick and she wants me to take care of it when she dies." I rushed out.
He let out a small chuckle that turned
into a laugh. I sucked my teeth. "Why are you laughing." His laughing died down. "I can't laugh."
I huffed and rolled my eyes. "Shut the fuck up and listen to me." He cocked his eyebrow at me.
"I told her I had to talk to you before I made a decision about keeping it."I said. He shrugged. "Ion know why. You ain't never went through me to make a decision before so why now." My heart sank and anger flared up as I glared at him.
I took a deep breath and nodded. "So all that shit bout getting married, a house in the hills, and having kids was cap?" I asked with a little hurt in my voice.
"Well ion know about the house part but it was in the heat of the moment." He answered looking away. I nodded gathering my things.
"But I mean like just think about it tho. Be barely even know each other to just up and get married. And your young you got yo whole life to get married and have kids." He said like it was nothing.
"Is there something you wanna get off yo chest or sum cuz what the fuck was that. All you had to say was that you ain't want no kids and now you don't wanna be wit me no more ?"
"Listen all I'm saying is I barely know anything about you besides from what I see. All we ever did was fuck." He said looking me in my eyes.
My heart sank to my ass. I felt my eyes water while I nodded my head. I turned and headed for the door as he called after me.
When I got to the car I just called Rae and told her I was keeping the baby. I wiped my face and put that shit behind me. I thought about life so far as I drove to the hospital.
I mean I'm doing good. I'm 19 living in a house that I bought by my self, shit I'm young, black and im still living thats good enough right?
The only thing I regret is not going to college but high school was hard enough with the life that I live. Plus I know I can be something without college.
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He took a puff of his blunt. "Since you around grown folks you might as well do grown folk stuff." He said while his friends laughed. He tapped the lady on his lap. "Go on and take him to the back room." She snapped her neck and looked at him like he was crazy. And he was.
"You heard what I said right."His deep voice boomed through out the basement. "Gucci his balls ain't even dropped yet he's a baby." She exclaimed. At that moment I knew what that meant. His friend Staxx used to take me to the "back room."
He put his gun on the table and it got quiet. She looked at me with sad eyes and got up. He tapped Staxx's shoulder and motioned for him to follow. My heart dropped as she held my hand and led me to the back room.
🇫 🇱 🇦 🇸 🇭 🇰 🇧 🇦 🇨 🇰
🇴 🇻 🇪 🇷
I sighed deeply as I grimaced. No matter how hard I try to push that shit down it never leaves me. Sometimes I forget though and life just stops but today just seems like one of those days.
I parked the car in a sensible spot and got the large teddy bear out. I came when I heard mir first got shot but his moms just told me he was supposed to be waking up any minute now. I was so ready to pop shit but of course he handled it. He knocked off most Zays crew but the ones who was still down were probably plotting.
They were well known too so I know hella folks want him dead or they after tay so I talked to folks to get it handled. But how ever this shit goes imma try my hardest to step away from Gucci and all of this bull shit.
I do got a kid on the way. I smiled a little having something to look forward to. Imma step down tomorrow and pay my dues to get out. I got over a mill put up for safe times. This is it I guess.
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𝙽𝚒𝚌k 𝚂𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊
"So who is his other son cuz I've never heard anything about him." I said feeling my blood boil. Now that I know his side of the situation I don't feel the same about him but there is still a lot to be explained.
"Her...name is nairobi casan. She was born intersex in common with you but she's always felt like a girl and she's been taking hormones for two and a half years."
"So shes trans gender? How old is she?" I asked. "Well..." She looked down. "Now don't get upset but shes 16 years old." We made eye contact. "Her birthday?"
"June 24th."
"You mean to tell me that when I was a baby he was out cheating with other women." I exclaimed.
"Nigga he been cheating. You ain't hear him say he got a bitch pregnant so he married her?" Pimp said making me scrunch my face at him and his mother smacking her lip.
"How am I just supposed to forgive him."
"Your not just gonna forgive him forgiveness is a process equivalent to healing. And I'm positive he knows that that's why he didn't want you to know. He wants you to forgive him in your time as you should."
"Plus ya moms don't care about him cheating so why should you. I mean she probably was hurt by it but she knew and she forgave him." Pimp shrugged.
"What he's trying to say is that it's not your fight to fight. Your mom knew he was a ladies man. She just didn't want to believe it."
I nodded wiping my tears. This was in fact an awakening experience.
"Ok enough now your vitals are beginning to go down and your scaring your momma so you need to leave now." Ms. René said as she wiped my face some more.
I took a deep breath as we began to walk to the front room. "Now Mir you can't tell tay or your mom anything about you being here." I nodded. I didn't ask any questions because I felt like this was information I was lucky enough to hear and it's probably a rule here not to speak in the pass or future in the 'living world'.
She then gave me a hug and It felt like the most warm and comforting thing. I started to tear up again because tay never got to experience this. He never met her.
"Don't cry every things gonna be ok."She nodded as she held my head in her hands wiping my tears.
Next was pimp. He wrapped his long slender arms around me and all I thought about was how much tay and Santana were so hurt at his funeral. The look in his eyes when the doctor said he didn't make it tore me apart.
I began sobbing as I hugged him back.
"I know. I know." He rubbed my back. "You gotta calm down lil nigga before you get stuck here. And I need you and my nephew to be there for tay because we physically can't." He said as he wiped my tears.
"Nicky baby you gotta go now before they bring out an AED." She said. I nodded and headed for the door. I looked back one last time. "Imma be watching over y'all lil bro." Pimp said.
"Me too. And make sure tay keep his ass out of trouble."She said. I dryly chuckled making her smile as to me not being so sad any more. I turned around and reached for the door knob before opening it seeing a bright light.
"And Nick?" I turned around."We love you." Her voice sounded as if it was in my head and it began to fade out as I drifted in the light before it got completely dark.
A loud flatline noice faded in before my body was shocked. It felt like fire blazing from my chest to my fingers tips. My eyes shot open and I looked around seeing my moms screaming, crying and being held back by tay and what looked like Roddy.
My vision was blurry and My hearing was muffled. I realized I wasn't breathing and I gasped for air causing me to choke as someone took the oxygen mask off of my face.
I blinked a few times as my vision became clearer. My moms rushed to my side as she held my hand and called my name. I tried to tell her I was okay but my throat was so sore.
"It's ok nick were gonna get you some water in a little bit. Right now we need you on your side."A woman doctor or nurse said as she tried turning me on my left side. I felt the baby move a little during action and it calmed my heart a bit.
I felt a pinching on my side as I carefully settled on the soft bed like foam. I hissed as the pinching got tighter. "Careful or your gonna rip your stitches." My moms said as she caressed my head softly.
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𝚃𝚊𝚢𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝙼𝚌𝙸𝚗𝚝𝚢𝚛𝚎
I calmed down as I watched as they put oxygen tubes back in his nose. My heart dropped to my ass when I heard that flat line. I can't imagine living with out him and its crazy because I just met him 6 months ago.
I accepted the deal from Gucci yesterday and I'm going to buy the house next to Jay's today. I talked it over with ma instead of Mir because I shouldn't have took it. But if I didn't I would have to be fighting him for the rest of my life. And that's too much for Mir and the baby.
She agreed with me and she said we should keep it a secret from Mir. But I'm knowing I can't. I need to talk to my pops tho. I'm not even sure if he knows about pimp or anything of this shit. I sighed.
"Aye let me talk to you for a minute." This lil nigga that came in here bearing gifts said as he tapped me on my shoulder. I looked him up and down as I followed out in the hallway.
He stood with his arms crossed as his jaw clenched. I scrunched up my face not knowing the reason why he would be mad with me. "The fuck you got going on with him."
He sounded like he was his pops or sumthin. I jerked my neck back. "That's my business don't worry abou"- "Nah nigga Mir is my business and you shouldn't even be around him."
I huffed looking away. "You and I both know none of this shit wouldn't have happened if he wasn't around you."
I looked back at him. "So what u want me to leave? I can't leave him right now it's too much shit going on."
"I'm not saying leave permanently. You need to go somewhere and lay low until this shit with Gucci is squashed."
"The shit with Gucci is already squashed. And how the fuck you know about that. Ion even know you?" I questioned. This lil nigga know too much for us to just be meeting.
"The fuck you mean it's squashed? If both of y'all still living then it ain't squashed"- "Its been dealt with." I said as he took a step back.
"Dealt? Bitch is you working with him now?" He said getting louder. "Look what ever I do is my fucking business."
"Do"- He took a deep breath. "Do you know how much danger you just put him in? Do you?"He whisper yelled.
"It was either I take the deal or I die. There was no in between. Me as a person, I would've tried to kill him before he killed me and even if I took that chance one of his niggas would've killed me."
"I don't care about my life enough to not take the risk but it's one thing to just die on Mir it's another to die leaving him to take care of my baby."I said as his eyes widened.
"BABY!?"He exclaimed. "Will you please keep quiet on this hall and what are y'all out here doing anyway."Ma Shai said.
"Ma how could you not tell me he's pregnant." He said in a respectable manner. "Roddy I'm sorry but I knew you were gonna act like this if I told you. I wanted Mir to tell you himself."
She said as she held on to him. Roddy. I heard that name before. If pimp was here I know he would tell me.
"Come on now Mir's feeling better and I know he wants to see both of you."She said and I walked in first to the nurse helping him sit up on his back.
He doesn't even look pregnant just a little chubby. His once tone muscles became softer. I sighed peacefully as I noticed his skin picking up color again.
"Stop looking at me like that." He said as he laid his head back a little. He looked so uncomfortable but peaceful at the same time.
"Alright Nicolas."The doctor came back in with his clipboard. "It seems like your vitals are regulated but we still need you to be on your left side every 30 minutes to an hour."
"We also need you to eat and I know you might not have an appetite but I will personally go to the cafe and bring you something...edible."He said as laughter erupted in the small area. Before you know it everyone started talking to each other.
I went to sit closer to him. "Hey."I said as I scooted a chair closer towards him. He smiled softly as he caressed my hand. "Hey."His eye lids looked heavy and his voice was a little raspy.
Nonetheless my heart flustered from his touch and his voice. "I missed you."I said. He smiled. "I missed you more."I chuckled dryly. "You scared the life outta me you know."I said as I kissed his forehead.
"My bad. I'm straight tho."He assured me. "I know I know but it's not just you that I have to worry about now." I said as we both smiled softly. The door suddenly opened revealing Jay and Glizzy.
As soon as he noticed Roddy,he engulfed him in a large hug. "Damn glizz."He laughed. "You getting a little too big to be jumping on me like that."
We all looked at each other because we know he's sensitive about his weight. "That's because he's pregnant."Jay said as he took a sip of drink.
He paused and then took a step back and looked between Glizzy and Mir. "Damn. So we all having kids huh?"He said looking at all of us. Everybody looked around at each other.
"Roddy what do you mean we?"Ma asked.
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This book almost over 🤧🤌🏽