The rising sun cast a rosy hue across the morning sky, it's crisp and clear. In the wash of the new light, the surrounding takes on the appearance of an old photograph, one of nostalgia, so beautiful. Time may have passed by, and a lot of renovations may have been done, but the far away chirping sound of birds and that peculiar morning smell of freshly watered garden and the familiarity, still remain the same.
"Class of 2013" the huge banner that's hanging on the top school gate reads. A little smile caresses my lips, followed by a sigh of contentment. Abbah squeezes my hand gentle, giving me a warm smile.
Graduation ceremonies are always excessive in PIC, it's one of the biggest ceremony of the year. So it's always been grand, extravagant and what not. Everything about that day was shouting right from the gate.
"Are you nervous?" He asked.
"A little." I demonstrates with the tip of my forefinger as the car passed through the gate. It soon comes to a halt amongst other fancy cars parked in the designated parking lot for the day.
"Don't be scared, I will be right there with you." I nodded even though I wasn't scared. It's just the day getting on me. I smile to reassure him I will be just fine. He patted my left shoulder, and I left him in the car to join my mates before the ceremony began.
Everything and everyone is in their finest. Just like many of my peers, I was dressed neatly in my school uniform for the very last time. Though, unlike must of the Muslim girls, I tied my scarf into a simple turban instead of a hijab.
The homemade bit*h obnoxious stare penetrates every inch of me as I entered behind the stage room of the multi-purpose hall, where the ceremony will be hold. Ms Aisha, the visual art teacher was there making sure everyone is in their best behavior.
"Hi bit*h!" I said right into her ears, though I came in peace. So I passed by her to where Hidiya and Sadiya with nose mask stood, waving at me. "Are you sick?"
"I guessed, I got too excited. I will see a doctor later." Sadiya replied, adjusting the mask well on her nose.
Yeah, it's the official day and everything is overwhelming. I don't know if it's just me or everyone is feeling the same, that's if excitement count as one. Not long after my entry the school band members started the welcome melody, it's soothing and everyone in the room became quiet. I guess the guest are coming inside now.
The quietness soon consumed me, reminding me of what's yet to come. There are a lot of things to consider, people might think I am so sure of myself when it comes exams. Most of the time, yes. But whenever there's an important exam I tend to get worried like everyone else. Perhaps, even more than them, for failure terrifies me. Therefore, for as long as my Jamb, WAEC and NECO result are in the offing, my mood swing might somehow continue.
"Everybody adjust your gown and be prepared, we're going out soon." Ms Aisha repeated at the same time my phone beeps from the small side bag under my black graduation gown, which have my name boldly engraved on it from behind. So I checked my phone before following the queue the visual art teacher is arranging
It's a message from Isma'il 'aunt and I are here, Noorie.' The messege reads. I'd personally invited him here, as for abbah's wife, whether she's here or not, it doesn't matter. Nevertheless, maybe, just maybe I got myself a brother. Someone I shall always count on, perhaps a reliable person. Last night Isma'il promised I can always trust him. And I was stupid enough ask abbah about it.
"Congratulations, my kitten." Abbah had said once again this morning when he's tying my tie, something we usually do for each other.
"Abbah!" I called, sounding a bit withdrawn.
"Yes dear."
"Can we trust him?" I asked, now sounding like a little girl that I inwardly scoffed at myself, that wasn't how I expected my tone to came out.
"Who is that?" Abbah's brows knitted at once, and suddenly his face darkened into a protective and curious one.
"Your nephew." I almost laughed at his sudden change of expression. I saw him sighed, too.
"Isma'il?" His eyes carefully detecting me as I nodded. A small smile graced his lips.
"Of course, we can trust him. Or do we have any reason not to?"
"Nothing at all, I was only asking to be more sure."
"He's family, Noorie. So we should give him the benefit of that. Somehow you two practically grow up together, I thought you trust him which was one of the main reason, why I brought him here."
"But you never asked me, if was okay with that."
"It's too late to throw tantrums about that now, it's also a surprise. I thought you two were good friends already." Abbah said smiling and that's when I realized, abbah brought Isma'il for me. Giving the fact that Isma'il never missed a chance to talk and smile at me, as for me under the watchful eyes of Inna Yelwa, I always end up responding to him, so things might be easily mistaken.
So now, Isma'il is officially one of my person. And since they are very few people like him and abbah in my life, I will hold on to that new relationship.
"Ms Adam, where is you focus." Ms Aisha's intruded in my thoughts. "Match on!"
The graduation ceremony soon starts with a very long speech from our British Nigerian vice principal academic, Mrs Ivy Brisson. Mrs Ivy have been a Nigerian ever since she can remember. She have two of her generation in the country, and believe me when I say, she's so Nigerian. In her long speech, she talked about a lot of things, I picked little things here and there, and some got me thinking, like;
"There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized. Today I tell you that whether you fear it or not, disappointment will come. The beauty is that through disappointment you can gain clarity, and with clarity comes conviction and true originality … Work hard, be kind, and amazing things will happen. For you and you alone are the only person who can live the life that can write the story that you were meant to tell. And here at the presence of your loved one and well wishers, I urge to be the hero and heroine of your life not the victim. This is just the beginning of your journey."
After Mrs Ivy, Mr Peter continued from there, singing our praises. And then finally comes the time I have been anticipating for. The moment for everyone to remember me.
Before the end of the day, I ended up with three good award, becoming a muse to many. One; is the overall best in Mathematics from the beginning of my senior year, if I may add I only get lucky with numbers. I also received the title of the Silver student of the year, which unfortunately I wasn't the only students that received it. Akin Yecho from the art class received a silver title too, for being the finest visual artist, I had a hunch about him ending as a silver. I have seen his drawing and he is good at what he does. Once upon a time, Akin Yecho thought we could be friends since we're both the school icon, he have been to places for drawing competitions and always came back victorious. But that didn't mean we could be friends.
Third person with the Silver title is the Yoruba guy whose number is always so hard to pronounce, the name have at least eight consonant, Mrs Ivy never pronounce the name right, neither do I. I don't even know how to say it. Anyway, the consonantly named boy for being the football champion also became a silver. And for being a silver it mean, our photos will be hanged on the wall of achievement aka PIC wall of excellence. Being on that wall doesn't just means passing the exams. It's beyond that and more, and along side not so many other notable ex-students, my photo is hanged.
My third award is for being a top student in academics during my years in PIC. Let just say I'm elated, but I only put on a small smile. "While I can spend this time thanking many staff that have helped me reached where I am today, I choose to talk to my peers, I haven't said much to them. So to everyone who is graduating- today is for you. You can look at yourself in the mirror later tonight and know that you beat the odds that may have been stacked against you; whether it be unforgiving pasts, unfortunate experiences, or any person who told you you couldn’t do it. And yet, you did it. We all have dreams, some are meaningless due to our age, but we can always make new ones. Whatever you do, do make sure your heart and mind are at ease with your choice. Don't bail out on your life, for you're the only constant. Many people might there, but you're the biggest asset. Thank you abbah."
From the stage as I collect my third award from the father of the day, a minister whose title I didn't fully get, my eyes fell on my abbah's proud ones. Along his side is his wife and next to her, is my cousin, whose smile is also big. I also received a bouquet of multicoloured roses from Mr Uche.
"Noorur-rahman Adam with the silver tittle." Mubin said out of the blue, as I try to exclude myself from crowd. "Congratulations! I wish you the very best." He smiled genuinely meaning what he said, at least from his eyes.
"Don't you have where to sit in the crowd?" I pointed at the crowd of people, many indulge in their food and children. That's me trying to mock him, but he smiled dismissively.
"I just read something about you here." He raised to my face the school magazine he is holding in his hand. It's for that session.
"What about it?" I raised my brows questioningly.
"Page 20th of the magazine talked about you and how it all started."
"You're really new around here." I scoffed folding my arms, he kind of look excited at latest discovery, which is me. "Let just say everyone knows my face is going to be on that magazine, so it is not surprising to anyone except you."
"This is not the first time?"
"No, it happens every year, for six years."
"Your parents must be proud. You even received a scholarship to study abroad." I forgot to mentioned the scholarship part, which is practically my abbah's money. Abbah is one of the school shareholders and the shareholders raised those scholarship fund in collaboration with some British organization. Mrs Ivy suggested I go to Harvard.
"I guess so." I replied to his inquiry.
"Your mother is coming for you." He added motioning behind me with his eyes. His eyes so adoring that I almost get lost in them, but then he mentioned mother. Its shattered everything. Hoping it's our final meeting, I dropped him a small smile, but not before correcting his sentence. "I don't have mother!"
He stares as Noor walk away from him, her face already replaying in his head, 'I don't have a mother.' Is that what is missing in her life? He wonder.
It's going to be their day and they might never meet again. So at least, even if it's going for a brief moment, he chose to put up with her shenanigans. Although, nothing much happened and with just a blink of an eye, he couldn't point her out from the crowd.
Her absence already walling up in his chest and he knew very well without a tad of doubt, he's going to miss the cocky prideful arrogant girl, Noorur-rahman Adam. He knew they have already parted ways since the day she finished her exams. Then, where did that heaviness in his chest come from?
Mubin stayed foot, despite the invisible string that's suddenly pulling him to tail on Noor. The sun go down and night fell on upon his gloomy mood. There he sat under the new crescent moon after everything, staring at the huge photo of Noorur-rahman on the twentieth page of the school magazine.
Apparently, as Noor had said, it wasn't anything new. He'd browse through the previous school magazines and her photos are everywhere. He even saw the ones she was much younger and her frown in the photos was deeper than how she frowns now. And even at that moment, it hurts him that even that afternoon as she walked away, she didn't turn back to look at him, not even ones.
Noorur-rahmam slumps in her seat, maybe now she understood her gloomish mood from the past few days. At first her mind believed it's leaving PIC, then she pinned it on her stepmother and then Isma'il. That also change after some logical thought she'd done, then she believed it's the awaiting results.
However, now as she early went through a reality check, she felt the actual truth, which she will indeed do everything to never accept. Maybe all the other reasons partly have something to do with it, yet there were just the triggering factors. Her heart is still in her throat since this afternoon and no amount of water has yet been able to pull it back to its place.
Why does it have to be him? Her inner voice shouts at her and she pulls the root of her newly braided box braid.
"You'll hurt yourself with that?" Isma'il said, he have noticed her doing that since they sat at the backyard. Jamila organized a small barbeque for her and her friends. And since Noor doesn't have many friends, only Asad, Hidaya and Asmara came. Sadiya has a flu which is why she couldn't come.
Abbah and Jamila were also present there at some point, but they left to let the youngsters have their own time.
"Tell me, what brought back that mood again?" Isma'il asked again handing her a glass of orange juice.
"That's her natural look, broh." Asad jokes.
"Mean jerk!" Noor cursed and he burst out laughing at her expression. He and Isma'il done the meat and sausage grilling earlier. It's fun, Noor even told Asad he will look good selling suya.
"There's really something wrong with PIC!" Asad said, pitching the bridge of his nose and making his exaggeration obvious.
"What?" Hidaya asked, Noor's brows furrowed, if she knew Asad very well, then knew that'll be a comeback. He's nice and all, but he could a be jerk too.
"They didn't give Noor the meanest girl award. Instead, she end up being a silver." He pointed, the people around there chuckles while Noor rolled her eyes at him. Neither of them, need to be told that Noor is mean. One way or the other they have all witness it.
"I don't like you, Sad."
"I know that, Noorie. You ditched me the other day. "
"Move on, Asad!"
"Well how does it feel to be a silver?" Hidaya cut them up and focus her attention at Noor who scrunched. She loves the attention and all, but she really is not in the mood at moment.
"It just feels like eating after being hungry, I guess. Why's Asmara not talking, Isma'il?" She diverted the attention and they all stare at the quiet girl.
"Oh yes!" Isma'il noticed now." Yeah, the girl have been playing the innocent card since she sat there looking like a saint and blushing when ever her crush said a word.
"Did you also graduate this year?" He asked.
"No, it's last year!" Asmara said shyly not looking at him, maybe everyone have noticed that except for him.
"She's older than me." Noor said.
"Everyone is older than you, Ms Adam." Asad made a remark again.
"Except for you, Sad." She rolled her eyes.
"Stop attacking her, Asad?" And there comes the defender, her new found brother.
"Okay, we all know Noor is so boring, right Asmara?" Asad continued.
"I said stop attacking her."
"She ditched me!" He reminded him, Asad is still mad at Noor for not coming with him to the school picnic.
"On her behave, I am so sorry she did that. She wasn't in the mood on that day. So just assume it's her saying I am sorry to you."
That really made Noor laugh, she can't remember anyone defending her in a very long time. Although she knew it isn't anything serious, but she actually liked it.
"Okay Asad, I know you are quite excited for these whole graduation thing. So I'm sorry, I didn't give it much important. Thank you for always being here, my dear friend. I was joking when I said I didn't like you." And that left them all astonished. I'm sorry and thank you are never on the list of Noor's vocabulary, her dictionary doesn't even have the definition.
"That's super duper, weird!" Hidaya exclaimed.
"Oh, my, God! Broh, she got swapped." Asad eyes were as round as a soccer ball, who wouldn't be shocked to hear Noor use those phrase, maybe only abbah. He open his mouth to say something again, but Noor beat him to it.
"I will take that back then, and It won't matter if you continue sulking."
"It's my pleasure to have you, Noorur-rahman." Asad was quick to add, why will he let her take the nicest thing she have ever said to him.
.....
Anxiety churned in the pit of my stomach,
my feet and spine tingling. And my vision begins to disfigure, as if I'm looking through a fish-eye lens. I sat there glued to the sofa, clenching and unclenching my fists. I could just leave and never look back, but where to. Breathing becomes hard. Really hard. As if I'd just run a marathon. I'm better than this, I'm not weak, I began in my head like a mantra.
All these must be a mockery! Abbah is just joking with me.
"Noorie my child, are you there?" Somehow I nodded, raising my head to look at the man across the room. So, this is what the suspense was all about. Abbah wasn't dying from any terminal illness, rather it was me that'll be terminally inflicted.
It's a Saturday morning, exactly a week after my graduation. Last night abbah told me someone was coming over to see me. At that moment I thought he's already thinking of getting me married, like most of my cousins, a lot of them got married immediately after graduating secondary school. Some of them further their studies afterwards, while most of them became full time mothers and wives. But people like Sa'a, they does nothing.
So when Abbah told me someone was coming over to see me, I thought it will be a suitor, and my life will fall between those two categories. Albeit, that wasn't the case, deep down I knew it wasn't. The matter is not even closely related.
There's this huge stranger, I no idea if it's his babba riga making him that big or he's that huge due to a lot of consumption. Nevertheless, he's there right before me, making me awfully sad, and my paapi who gave him the pleasure of letting us meet, is just killing me. Each and every word spoken that morning in that living room pierce through my heart like a dagger aiming at the right target, which turned out to be my heart. I will live to remember this day.
"I don't want go anywhere with him. Why will I even go with him, Abbah? What if he is going to sell me? We don't even know what kind of people they are." A lump too hard to swallow has already formed in my throat, and the knot in my chest only tighten. I look up at abbah, who's already looking helpless. But why? Was I adopted?
Everyone said I have my abbah's feet. Matter of fact, not even Hajiya has ever mocked me for not being a Danja. But still why? Why is abbah so powerless over me today. Why can't he just oppose to this shenanigans and let us be. From my part I can even pretends it never happened. But my abbah is nowhere in that room, only his replica is. Will he ever be there for me when I really need him? If not, then no I refused to just go on with this.
Whatever is going to happened will happen, but I go no where with this huge looking man. My foot, to where ever he think he's taking me, that's utter rubbish. A sickeningly kind of smile displayed on my face. So I closed my eyes, counting. I will only count to ten, and their time starts now. They should talk or forever hold their peace.
One,
Two,
Two and half.....
"Noor, I know who they are." Says abbah, he manage such a big organization. However, today for the obvious reason, he can't even defend himself. Why will she still have power over him? Isn't he the one with the say here, why'll he let them do as they pleases? Why am being the object here?
I see that my opinion wouldn't even matters. They have already decided since the moment I have been depressed for something being wrong with abbah. I'm just being told for telling sake. Then let me see how they'll drag me out of the house without my consent. Though, deep down, very deep down where it will never see the light of the day, I know I'm helpless for as long as abbah already made his mind. He'll find a way to convince me.
"No abbah, you don't. A long time had passed. What will be the use of it now? I never asked for this because I don't want it. So please let me be." I said with all the seriousness I posses, directing my last statement to stranger, who came in cohort with the she devil herself. I hate them all!
"Noorur-rahman, I..... " The stranger began, but I caught him
"Don't talk to me, I don't know why you think you have the right to take me anywhere. Not now or ever. Whoever sent you, tell them I'm not interested."
"No one sent me, just listen to what I have to say." By then I was already on my feet, and before I could even grasp it, I was running up to my room and only make a stop in the toilet. Anger wrings out my heart like a dishcloth and I throw up my gut down the toilet...
........
Salam lovelies,
I was passing by and decided to drop this🙈
So any thought on the huge stranger and Abbah?
What about Noor, Mubin and Isma'il?
Yes guys, lemme hear from the comment section. Know that your comment may encourage a quick update.
Don't forget to comment, share and vote
❤❤❤
Assalamu alaikum!