And yet there will be happiness...

Family

Sidney pacing the room with long strides. Since the morning, he had been unable to find a place for himself, and hope and an unaccountable fear had mingled in his mind in one big tangle, tormenting him and forcing him to look at the clock, counting the minutes remaining until the evening.
- Today is a day that can change my whole life, I can't afford to miss it - repeated Sidney over and over like a spell.
"Today there will be a masquerade ball. Another masquerade" Sidney thought, and smiled, letting his thoughts ease the long wait. He went to the stairs and looked up, and in his memory, as always, the unmistakable image of Charlotte's native figure, descending it with ease and grace, came back to him. The candlelight reflected in her unearthly eyes and glinted on her gorgeous gold-colored dress. Her thick, unruly hair was pulled up, revealing her slender neck and the delicate curls of hair at her temples. Charlotte smiled, and it seemed to Sydney that the room was suddenly brighter.
Standing there at the bottom of the stairs, waiting for her like a bridegroom at the altar, he felt the same excitement and impatience. She stopped beside him. Time seemed to stand still for Sidney, he seemed to gasp with delight, emotions swept over over him and flooded his head, his heart was pounding so loudly in his chest that it covered the ticking of the clock on the wall. A wave of joy and tenderness swept over him when Charlotte appeared. He found himself unable to stop looking at the vision, unable to take his eyes off it for a second, and he felt an irresistible desire to touch her, even with the tips of his fingers, to feel the warmth of her hands. Even then, looking at her and melting with delight and tenderness, Sidney realized how important this girl was to him. He unconsciously reached out to her from their  first meeting, his own desires and feelings frightened him and he resisted them as much as he could( "Who are you kidding, resisted. I tried to resist, " he corrected himself), but at some point he realized that it was pointless. This incredible, incomprehensible young woman had already settled deep in his heart, filling every corner of his mind and bringing with her the warmth and affection that warmed his lonely heart. Her openness, sincerity, honesty, and a fervent desire for justice made it almost impossible, they broke down the walls that he had worked so hard to build around himself all these years. Charlotte burst into his life like a fresh wind, scattering all his judgments and arguments about the reasonableness of loneliness. Looking into her deep eyes, he clearly realized that he could no longer and did not want to be alone, that without her, his life would never be complete again. Sidney knew that he had found the one person he could trust with his aching heart.
There was a rush of loud footsteps, and Sidney saw Tom coming down the stairs.
- Oh, Sidney, are you coming to me? - Tom asked when   he saw him at the foot of the stairs.
- Oh... I... No, Tom - Sidney muttered absently, the image of Charlotte still lingering in his mind.
-Today is a great day, Sidney, today we will make history! - Tom widely smiled, he was determined and, seemed already nothing can debauch him mood - Such event! Sanditon will be talked about everywhere!!! Excellent! Excellent! - Tom had said it to Himself and walked into the room.
Sidney didn't say anything, he wanted to share this joy with his brother with all his heart, but after weighing all the pros and cons, he decided to hold his feelings, realizing that today things could not go as planned. "Will she want to see me? Talk to me? What she will tell me? What can I tell her after what I did?."It was painful and bitter for him to remember the engagement and everything that happened after.
" But I must, I must see her and talk to her. I can't live without her, this agony is simply unbearable."
-Would you like a drink? - Tom asked, pointing to the decanter.
- No, I don't need this - dryly responded Sydney, trying to contain their emotions - today I need a bright head.
He sat down silently in the chair opposite Tom and looked at  him. His brother looked up and met his eyes. There was a deathly silence in the room. It suddenly seemed to Sidney that Tom's silence told him more than he had in the last few years. In his wide-open eyes, he saw the pain, the anxiety for him... repentance..
- S.. Sidney - Tom stammered in a choked voice... I have long wanted to say as-Tom spoke falteringly, have him not worked pick a the right words - I grateful to you for all, that you made for me and my family - with effort said Tom, he sharply exhaled and settled down, as if gave on these words their recent forces...
- Tom - Sidney began, but he cut him off:
- I'm so sorry, Sydney, I'm so ashamed -Tom jumped out of the chair and nervously began to walk around the room, unable to cope with the emotions that rolled over him, his hands flew to his head, unconsciously ruffling his hair, there were tears in his eyes, he seemed almost mad to Sydney - I'm such a fool... with my plans, I completely forgot about the most important thing... about my family....I made you do it... I'm so sorry for you - he hesitated for a moment, then added - I'm sorry to both of you...
His face was so full of despair and pain that Sydney felt sorry for Tom.
- I had no choice, Tom, you are my family - said Sidney.
- But you and Charlotte - said Tom-  I didn't know... I was so stupid... I don't know can
you ever forgive me.
Tom was so pathetic that Sidney couldn't stand it, and he stood up and hugged his brother.
- You are my family - he said - and  Charlotte too - Sidney paused - Tom, she's the best that's ever happened in my life! Without she, everything doesn't make sense! And I betrayed and pushed her away and now I don't know how to get her back. I don't know if she needs me at all.
After telling his brother what he had been afraid to admit to himself for so long, Sidney realized that the fear that had dogged him all day had suddenly receded, giving way to determination and hope.
Finally, Sydney pulled himself together. Exhaling noisily, he patted his brother warmly on the shoulders and said, with a faint smile:
- We can handle everything, Tom, we can handle everything together!
Tom looked at his brother and smiled, too, he saw before him Sidney Parker, whom he had known well before, a strong and wilful man who never gave up. He was relieved.
- Then go ahead, ladies and gentlemen. Meet Sanditon and the joust!!! - Tom recited with a wide smile, holding up unimaginable figures in the air with his hands. His old determination and fervor returned to him.
Sidney smiled with relief and patted his brother on the shoulder again. The two men parted in silence, allowing each other to gather for the ball alone with their own thoughts.

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