Sanders Sides One Shots (REQUESTS CLOSED)

Control

Tw: self hatred, weight issues, wanting control. Please take caution reading this

This was requested by lunaeclispe22 I really hope you guys all like this!

'There's nothing I can control anymore,' Logan wrote. 'Nothing, anymore. None of them ever want to listen to me....It's kind of scary, if I'm being honest.'

Logan sighed and sat back from writing. Nobody, not even Thomas, was listening to him anymore. He hated it, despised it. He had no control, Thomas wasn't even listening to logic anymore. He was being reckless and Logan couldn't help, he felt useless. 

He got up and sighed. He had one thing he could control, his eating habits. Nobody paid attention, not Janus, not Patton. None of them did anymore. He was scared, but this was something he had control over. He wished he didn't.

Stepping on the scale, Logan sighed. 107. Way too low...but he didn't wish to change it anymore. Used to, he wanted to. But since nobody noticed, hopefully it wasn't as bad as he thought it was. 

Logan went out for dinner, just going through the motions. He talked to the others, listened to them, but no smile. It was nothing none of the others weren't used to. Logan hardly smiled anymore. They all had been worried at first...but they figured he was simply stressed. They all thought that if he needed help, he would ask for it.

They were all wrong. Logan was getting less and less...there by the day. He was paler than the other sides, he hardly left his room. The others knocked and knocked, tried bringing him food. Patton was only able to get in while Logan was sleeping. 

Though, that's almost all Logan ever seemed to do anymore, honestly. He was scaring everyone else...but they couldn't control him anymore.

Logan went to get up one day, and stumbled. He grabbed his bed and shook his head, sighing. He got up and went to go out, but as he reached for the knob, he stopped.

His hand was turning paler, more...see through, almost. He paused and looked confused, falling down. He couldn't feel his legs, his arms.

So...this was what happened when a side fades, huh? He felt...peaceful. Logan felt peaceful, knowing he'd done this. He knew Thomas was in capable hands, with Janus there. With the one he loved there.

Logan laid back and closed his eyes. He had written a note in case this day ever came. It was on his desk. He hoped they found it...yet another thing he couldn't control, he supposed.

~

Hours later, Janus went and knocked on Logan's door. He went in, not seeing him. But he did see the note. He saw Logans clothes on the floor. He paused, not wanting to jump to conclusions.

He started reading the note, tearing up as he did so.

'Dear everyone. I suppose you can all guess what happened here, though I can see how you wouldn't, also. Nobody seemed to notice while I was alive, anyways.

I'm gone. I'm sorry, I faded. This is...apparently what happens when a side fades. I did not know what exactly would happen to me, honestly. But I had nothing else to control.

Janus, if you read this, I hope that you can somewhat keep the voice of reason in this group. You already seem to anyways, honestly. I'm sorry I left. And ah....please know that i harbor strong feelings towards you. I asked Patton what this feeling was and he told me 'love'.

Please, none of you mourn. I finally can control something again, I lost that over time as Thomas got more and more ambitious. 

I'm so sorry...but this was the last thing I could control.'