I'm Counting Every Lie

42: hhh

A month later/Friday

Things have been.. surprisingly good. Kellin is dating Vic but he still is my friend. Jordan has been scared of josh so him and matt have been keeping to themselves. Lee has been more of a friend to josh and me and I consider him a friend. He doesn't know our secrets but he does know that me and josh are close. We aren't dating but we still cuddle together a lot.

In the schools view we are simply friends and thats okay. I got my cast off yesterday but I have to wear a brace but it's not clunky or anything. Josh finds me by my locker and smiles. I close my locker and he stops and leans on the locker.

"Ready?" He asks. He then grabs my crystal crown and fixes it a little along with my hair. I blush and smile. Since I'm Josh's friend and people are slightly scared of him I havent been getting harassed much.

Kellin stopped messing with josh a long time ago because he really likes Vic. Kellin talks about Vic so much and I've never met Vic but apparently he's super smart and hot and blah blah blah. "Yeah, can we go to your spot?" I ask and he smiles. I love his teeth, his lips, his smile. I have a huge crush on Josh but he seems to like me as a friend that cuddles.

I understand that he doesn't like sexual stuff but I'd be okay with being his boyfriend but still avoiding that stuff. I'd love to kiss him but that's not a need. "Yeah, I actually was planning that and brought blankets," he says and we start walking. It's the end of school so it's not like we are skipping.

Once we get into his car he turns the heater on. Late November is fucking freezing. I have purple stockings under my black ripped jeans and a purple long sleeve under a black loose tshirt plus a heavy black jacket.

He drives and I cant help but look at him is aw. He is so hot.. I wish he saw what I see. I wish I could see what he sees when he looks at me. I think I'm still fat but I'm eating twice a day without feeling too bad.. some times I feel horrible but physically I have more energy and I snap less.

Josh has been eating two times a day and I make sure he doesn't go throw it up. He does sometimes.. but most of the time he's making progress. We both get hurt when one of us stops eating or tries to skip a meal but that just helps us see we aren't okay.

We are good for each other even if we are just friends.

I'm going to go get high so you get a short chapter

Thoughts?

Theories?

Oli?

Josh?

Time skip?