Little Red

FORTY FOUR

"Oh wow," Mrs.Locks said with a face full of astonishment.

Dani had just finished telling her the events of the night prior after the woman grew concerned about the slight bump that covered the left side of the girl's jaw. She had managed to hide the bruising with foundation, but the swelling had, of course, still been a problem.

"Yeah. I guess that's what I get for trying to stop a fight between two gorillas," Dani joked, which caused Mrs.Locks to smile.

"Well, is there a reason as to why you decided to do such a thing?" she asked, with her motherly instincts clearly taking over by her tone of voice.

A slight frown curved on Dani's lips as she thought of the answer.

"I don't know...I guess when I saw Trevor on top of my dad like that, it...it reminded me of Henry," she said while staring at the floor. "I'd tried to save him then, but Henry...hit me and I couldn't. Seeing him on the ground like that...it was one of the scariest things I've ever had to witness."

Unaware of the slip-up she'd made, Dani sniffed and wiped at her eyes as a stray tear had fallen before she continued.

"I had plotted to get my revenge, and when I had the perfect opportunity to act on it, I didn't. Henry was hurting him, and I didn't even try my hardest to save him...I didn't try my hardest to save my own father," she said before frowning as her father's voice popped into her head.

Stop blaming yourself for every bad thing that happens...

"Oh...I'm doing it again," she mumbled as her frown deepened. "Sometimes I do it without even realizing it."

"And what exactly would that be?" Mrs.Locks' asked, which made Dani slightly jump as she had forgotten where she was for a moment.

Straightening herself up, she said, "Blaming myself for everything bad that happens to me...I've been doing it since...since my grandmother passed away."

Mrs.Locks sent the girl a sympathetic look. "I see," she said with a nod. "Dani, have you ever heard of the term Survivor's Guilt?"

Dani frowned as she thought of the word. "No...No, I don't think so," she said with a shake of her head. "What does it mean?"

"Typically, when someone has survived a traumatic event in which others do not, they tend to feel...well...guilty of having survived," Mrs.Locks explained.

Dani's frown returned at the information.

"You said you've been blaming yourself for your grandmother's death, yes?"

She nodded slowly in answer.

"And though you and David may have survived Henry's attack at the barn..."

"Mr.B didn't," Dani said as a feeling of sadness formed in her heart at the thought of him. "I saw it in Henry's eyes that he didn't like Mr.B too much...but instead of warning him I just...I didn't-"

"Daniella, sweetheart, there are things in this world that we just cannot stop from happening," Mrs.Locks cut her off in a gentle tone.

Dani shook her head and said, "But I saw the hatred Henry had for Mr.B in his eyes! I felt like he was going to hurt him, but I didn't do anything to stop it!!"

She then frowned as she realized what she had done and mumbled, "And there I go with the self-blaming, again."

Dani's frown deepened as she sat back on the couch with a huff. She was trying her best to do what her father had told her to do, but every time she thought about the ones she lost, she just...couldn't.