Chapter XXVIII - Bechloe: More Than You Know (Part 3)

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Chloe's POV

You get back to your room and you burst into tears. You have to bury your face in your pillow to muffle the noise. You knew Beca was always one to speak her mind but you never thought that she would snap like that, especially at you of all people. Just when you thought that you and Beca were so close and so comfortable with each other, she goes and does that. She rips it out from underneath you and you don't know what to do other than cry. You're hurt to your core. You have never experienced this level of hurt before in your life and you know it's because your heart has just been shattered. Ever since that night, you have never been able to stop thinking about you and Beca in a more than friendly way. You're in love with her and you fall more and more in love with her each day. It's painful since you've watched her rebuff your advances time and time again but you always kept trying. You will ALWAYS keep trying for Beca.

But now, you feel differently. The way Beca just yelled at you and looked at you with such disdain and anger in her eyes says it all - she's not interested and you don't think she ever will be. The realisation hits you hard and it crushes you even more. You just want the feeling to go away but you know it'll take some time for that to happen. You want to hate Beca for what she just did but you can't find it in your heart to do so. You've been in love with Beca for three years and part of you still feels that way. You don't want to be in love with her and you hope that this argument will change the way you feel. You hope that your romantic feelings for her will disappear because you can't afford to keep getting hurt like this anymore. Three years you have been in unrequited love with someone and it's only blown up in your face.

You cry for ten minutes or thirty minutes, you're not sure which one but Stacie eventually comes into your room and comforts you. It's no surprise that the Bellas heard your argument. Beca practically screamed at you so loud it could have been heard from miles away. Stacie tells you how sorry she is and how Beca had no right to yell at you like that. Initially, you blame yourself saying that you came on too strong and that you were stupid to think there was something between you and Beca, but Stacie tells you otherwise. She confesses that she was really rooting for you and Beca to be together since you were pretty much in a relationship already without the romance. She then tells you not to blame yourself and that you deserve better than Beca. It hurts to hear because to you, there is no one better than Beca. You love the woman. You failed Russian literature three times so you could be with her.

You cry into Stacie's shoulder for a little while longer until you can shed no more tears. You thank her for her support and tell her that you want to go to sleep. She leaves your room and lets you sleep. The following morning, all of the Bellas speak to you and say how sorry they are for what happened the night before. You're a little embarrassed but you can see that the girls don't care about that. They are more concerned about you and they care for you. They all rooted for you and Beca to become an actual couple and they are all so mad at Beca for what she did. So, when the alt-girl comes downstairs, the Bellas give her the cold shoulder. Beca is confused at first but she quickly knows why they are treating her so poorly. You can't even look at Beca so you avoid her as much as you can for the next few days, which is hard since you two need to work on getting the team back on track.

It's exhausting trying to get a new routine ready for when you're asked to perform for a bunch of old people but it all goes to shit and you can't help but blame yourself. You organise to go on a retreat for you and the Bellas to rediscover your sound. You call Aubrey and organise a trip to the Lodge of Fallen Leaves where she works. She agrees that it's a good idea but she then goes on to speak about her fallout with Beca and you know Stacie has spoken to her about it. Aubrey says that she will organise a space for them only if you sort out your problem with Beca because she believes that to be the primary cause of the Bellas problems. You hate how she's right and you tell her that you're not ready to speak to Beca so Aubrey takes it upon herself to talk to Beca and she must do a good job since Beca enters your room later that evening.

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