All Black Everything // Luke Hemmings

Chapter 42

**Ana's POV**

It's been a week and Luke hadn't left the hospital. Mum had come to visit me everyday, but there was only so much she could take. Calum, Ashton, and Michael came to visit today.

"Ana...damn...wow." Calum said when he saw me. Chloe wasn't with him, she was visiting family.

"Hi, Cal." I said, looking up from the despot magazine I was given.

He was clearly close to tears. "How um, how are you? Like, mentally. And...and physically..." He ran a hand through his hair.

"I don't know yet. Hopefully I'll get better soon." I said, and shrugged.

"Ana, God I'm so sorry. You don't deserve all the shit you've been through." He said, sitting in the chair next time.

"Yeah. Sucks." I said, and we talked for a few more minutes before Michael came in.

"Hey, love." He said with a small, apologetic smile.

"Hey, Mikey. How are things." I replied.

"Well, one of my best friends is in the hospital. Not great." He replied. "But hey, I brought you something." He said, and pulled out a small bottle of liquor from under his jacket.

I giggled. "Damn, Michael you're going to get arrested!" I whispered.

"Awh, come on, Ana. I'm of legal age!" He said back.

"Oh yeah, because bringing booze into a hospital is totally legal." I said, and we laughed.

After a while, He left, and Ashton came in. He has already cried, I could tell. He stood in front of the door for a while, sort of preparing himself, I guess.

"Ash..." I said softly. He didn't say anything.

Instead, he walked over to the side of my bed and gripped my hand, softly drawing circles on the back of my hand with his thumb. He stared into my eyes, and I did the same back.

"Ash, come on." I said, after a while.

"Why?" He asked softly."

"There isn't a single reason, Ash. My entire life is shit. That's why." I replied.

"No, it isn't. I want you to know that there's so much to live for. For example...Luke. That kid loves you more than anyone in the entire world. He'd kill himself if you were gone, I swear it."

"Ash-" I said, but he continued.

"Also, you're beautiful I mean drop dead gorgeous. Everything about you is perfect. I've never seen another human being as absolutely stunning as you."

"Ashton stop." I said again, but he ignored me.

"You're an amazing photographer. Damn, you could be famous if you wanted to. You're hilarious. I couldn't tell you how many times you've made me laugh. You're smart, and you've only taken a few weeks of college. You love everyone you meet, because you know how it feels to have everyone you meet hate you."

"Ashton damn it shut up!" I almost yelled. "As lovely as all that sounds it's not true."

"No, Ana you don't understand." He said, "You don't think like that because you're living in this body. Everyone around you sees this perfect, talented, amazing girl. I can tell you right now that Mikey would have you any day. Cal loves Chloe, but he admits that you're beautiful. I mean, you know about me..." He said, looking down.

"Come on, Ash. That's all sweet, but it doesn't matter because I'm still laying here with stitches in both my arms reading a magazine about mental health because I thought I'd rather be dead than have to live another second. Every night it stems all my courage not to rip this damn thing out of my arm and stab it into my neck." I said, gesturing towards the needle in my arm.

"Don't you fucking say that." He said. "Don't. No. You have everything to live for, just remember that Luke is sitting right outside this door, and he has been for a week, and he isn't going to leave until he knows you're coming with him. You know he hasn't gotten any sleep because all he doesn't it sit here and make sure you don't try to kill yourself again, so that he can be there to help you if you do try?"

I couldn't say anything.

"Just remember that, Ana. Please, remember everything I've just said." He said, kissed my forehead softly, and left.