i'll show you

eight

this story is 17 comments away from 1k comments. if y'all REALLY love me, you'd get me there 👀

"where is she?" zayn asks. as soon as he entered the house, he was attacked with hugs by phoebe and daisy. they embraced in silence, all three of them finding comfort within each other. he then played a little with ernest and doris and his heart broke a little because those poor things didn't have a clue about what was going on.

"she's up in her room. she's supposed to be resting but we can hear the vacuum from upstairs." louis chuckles. "you can go up there now if you want."

zayn nods. "okay." he nods again. "yeah- okay."

he's nervous. well, he's not actually nervous. zayn doesn't know how to explain it. he's anticipating the conversation, yet he wants to see her. he doesn't think anyone can prepare themselves for a conversation about cancer with a loved one. he's afraid that his emotions will overcome him and that's the last thing he wants.

the vacuum is loud and clear as he approaches the bedroom and zayn chuckles. that's johannah for ya. he doesn't bother knocking on the door, assuming that she won't even hear it over the rumbling.

"shouldn't you be in bed?" zayn teases as he walks into the bedroom, closing the door behind him. johannah snaps her head up and smiles at zayn before turning off the vacuum.

"i've been in bed all day. those kids won't give me a break." johannah says, walking towards zayn and giving him a hug. zayn holds her close but not too tight, afraid of crushing her fragile body. "how are you?"

"i'm good." zayn says once he pulls away.

"louis told me you and your little boyfriend are back together." johannah smirks.

zayn rolls his eyes. "he's not my boyfriend." zayn wants to tell her that he wants him to be, but that's not what he's here for. "how are you?"

"i'm great!" she says, despite of the situation.

"mama jo..."

"don't give me that. come here." johannah walks to her bed and sits down, patting the spot next to her. zayn follows her and sits down with a sigh. "i'm assuming you're here because louis told you about my illness." she inquires and zayn nods. "i want you to know that everything will be okay. i don't want you worrying about me. i will fight until i can't fight anymore but until then, i don't want to see you shed a single tear."

"it's hard." zayn admits. the lump in his throat is back and he feels like he can't speak. "and i have some nerve to talk because i'm not the one who has cancer. you can't prepare yourself for these type of things, you know? you've been in my life for nearly all of it and i can't imagine the day when you're not. i'm-" he chokes up and johannah is quick to grab his hand.

"don't think that way." she tells him. "i can't tell you when my last day will be. it could be today, it could be tomorrow, it could be ten years from now but you will be okay." she stresses. "i have eight beautiful children," and that's when the tears fall from zayn's eyes. johannah is counting him as one of her own, "who i love with all my heart. you guys are the strongest kids i know. you will make it through."

"i love you." zayn tells her, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.

johannah coos and pulls zayn's head down onto her chest. "i love you too, zayn. you will always be my son. never forget that."

zayn doesn't know how long he cries in johannah's arms. he's thinking the worst, even though she told him not to. it's hard and he can't even imagine how louis and his siblings are feeling.

zayn didn't even try to hide the fact that he was crying as they walk back downstairs. this is practically his second family and due to the situation, he knows they won't judge him for his emotions.

"um, why are you out of bed?" louis asks, ernest and doris sitting on each of his legs.

"you guys can't keep me in there forever!" johannah cackles. "and i'm hungry. can i have dinner, please?"

"i want chinese." lottie decides and her siblings openly agree.

"chinese sounds good." johannah says. "i can order it. i just need to get my phone from upstairs-"

"no!" her children protest in unison. johannah cackles louder and all zayn can do is laugh.

"we can use my phone." félicité says. "you sit down." she says and points at her. zayn grabs johannah's arm and leads her to the couch where louis happily gives up his seat so that she can sit down.

"so... what are we ordering?"

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after a teary eyed hug with louis, zayn found himself at liam's house. safe to say, liam is like his comfort zone. zayn immediately feels better whenever he's with liam.

liam's waiting for him as soon as zayn walks into his house. liam pulls him into his arms, giving him a tight hug before pecking his lips. zayn lifts liam off of the ground causing liam to laugh. still holding liam, he walks up the stairs and into his room.

zayn throws him on the bed and gets in it himself. liam turns on his side so that he's facing zayn, smiling softly as he strokes zayn's face. "i'm proud of you." liam says.

"for?"

"i know how hard it was to talk to louis' mom. a part of me thought you would back out, but i'm glad you didn't. i'm proud of you." liam repeats. zayn smiles and surges forward, pressing a kiss onto liam's lips.

"i love you." zayn says.

"i love you too." zayn kisses him again. call it cheesy, but he will never get used to hearing those words. "ooh!" liam pulls away suddenly and gets out of the bed. "i bought you some things."

"like what?" zayn asks, watching liam grab a bag full of items.

"here." liam says and hands him the bag. zayn takes it and pulls out the material, holding it up in the air as he inspects it. "i remember you telling me how you've grown out of your leather jacket, so i got you a new one."

the jacket was shiny and fresh. zayn loved it but it looked so fucking expensive. "how much was this?" zayn asks.

liam scoffs. "like i'd tell you. go ahead, try it on."

zayn slips the jacket on and it fit perfectly. unlike his previous one, it wasn't tight at all. "thank you babe."

"check the pocket." liam urges. zayn checks the left pocket, but nothing was there so he checks the right pocket. it comes out as a clump and he spreads it on his palm. it was a sliver necklace with the word liam at the bottom of the chain. zayn looks up at liam to see liam grinning widely, swinging a necklace with the word zayn in his hand.

"you didn't."

"isn't it cute? i intentionally got them so that we could have our own names but i changed my mind. i like the thought of wearing your name. i'm yours and you're mine, right?" liam says. it's so fucking cute. liam looks so innocent standing there, admitting his secret love for possession.

"i love you so much. fuck."

oh yeah, i don't know if i updated y'all on this but i did end up spending $615 on one ticket for harry. whoops. at least he'll get to see my cute ass 😛