Distance

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After finishing her shift at the Talon Kennedy had returned to the mansion only to find the place empty and ghostly quiet. Whenever Lex was away on business the housekeeping staff very rarely entered the main house, keeping to their own quarters and only coming inside if there was work to be done. Still, 75+ rooms, she doubted the place ever felt anything but empty. 

But today she was grateful for the quiet. It gave her even more opportunity to mull over the events of the last few days. Top of the list: her feelings for Lex. And coming a very close second: Lex's father. She was also grateful that he had been nowhere to be found. No doubt he was in his office or out in the garden plotting his next dastardly move on how to get rid of her. Whatever he was up to was still weighing heavy on her mind, so much so that she had been thinking about leaving. If she wasn't here then he wouldn't feel the need to poke his nose where it really wasn't wanted. But then talking to Lana had given her a different perspective and made her realise that although leaving was probably the best option all round, it wouldn't be as easy as just walking out of the door and not looking back. 

The last few days with Lex had meant more to her than anything her entire life. She wasn't so sure she'd be able to turn her back on that so easily. There she'd been thinking she was happy relying only on herself, never revealing too much and never letting anyone in.

Until Lex. 

She loved him. What was the use in denying it? Especially to herself. What really shocked her about it all...how fast it had happened. She'd known the guy for only a few days. How was it possible to fall...to feel...so fast? But love...love knew no time or boundaries.

Just like Lex said only yesterday morning.

And what was it Lana said? 

'Even when love destroys you, you never give up on it.'

That little piece of unsolicited advice had touched her. Never had anything been as true. She'd lost many people she'd cared about - too many - and while she'd turned her back on love, love had other ideas. It quietly crept up on her in the form of Lex and he'd taken the one thing she'd guarded with her life. 

Her heart. 

And now she was contemplating telling him everything. Her big secret. Her love for him. All of it. It terrified her beyond belief. Because she'd never wanted to invite someone into her life and have them accept her as much as she did Lex. Telling Clark had been different on so many levels. There was no romantic connection between them. Telling Lex wouldn't be as easy. Because the one thing she was afraid of was having someone she cared about look at her like she was some sort of freak. Even though in her heart she knew he wouldn't. After all he'd told her that he'd been bullied and ridiculed as a child. But still...the fear was there. He loved her now and she hoped he would after. 

She spent the rest of what was left of the afternoon in the library reading. It was early evening when she closed up the book she had been lost in and took herself up to her room. Once there, she ran herself a bath and while she waited for the tub to fill she stood by the bedroom window looking out over the gardens that seemed to stretch for miles and miles. Resting her head against the window-frame she was lost in thought, when there came a gentle knock at her bedroom door. 

'Kennedy, it's me,' she heard Lex's voice on the other side. 'Are you in there?' 

The sound of his voice made her heart do a mini somersault. Then she remembered the running water and the bath. 

'Just a second,' she called out, giving herself time to dash into the bathroom and turn off the faucet before she caused a flood. When she opened up the door there he stood, hands in pants pockets and wearing the same jacket he'd left in that morning - making her think that coming to her room had taken precedence over a shower and change of clothes. The thought of which pleased her. 

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