[Ereri] The Screams that Saved my Sanity

15-An Egg, A Candle, and A Tear

-Eren's POV-

"I think I might love you, Eren."

My eyes shot open when I heard these words. As soon as I heard Levi close the door to his room I sat up on the couch. A huge smile appeared on my face.
I don't think I could say that a loved Levi but I definitely was excited that he might love me.
No one's ever loved me like that before.
It's weird to think that just the other day I would've done anything to leave this place.
Now I'll do anything to stay.

After a while I couldn't sleep so I stood up from the couch and walked to Levi's room. Slowly I opened the door and walked in. Levi was sleeping on his side with the covers on him. I walked around the bed and watched him as he slept for a moment before climbing into bed next to him.
Why the hell not.
I carefully slid into the covers so I didn't wake him up.
He won't mind...
At first I stayed on the side of the bed furthest from him. I didn't want to bother him because I knew he had to go to work tomorrow.
Of course eventually I didn't want to stay on this side of the bed anymore.
I scooted closer to Levi until I could put my arm around him. I smelled his hair.
How do you always smell so good?
Smiling, I tightened my grin around his waist and pulled him closer to my chest. He rustled in his sleep but he didn't wake up.
Yes!
I played with his hair until I finally fell asleep, with Levi still in my arms.

-Levi's POV-

I heard my alarm clock go off in the morning and groaned.
"Shut up." I mumbled, still half asleep. As I turned around in the bed to turn the alarm off I was met with something in my face.
What the hell?
I opened my eyes and saw Eren sleeping soundly next to me. He had one arm around me and the other one over his head.
Wow. You do not quit.
I brushed his hair out of his face and quietly got out of bed and pulled the covers over him so he could sleep. After getting dressed and eating I went to work.
Time for another week in hell.

-------time skip because work is boring---------

I fished the keys out my pocket and opened the door. When I walked into the kitchen I saw Eren trying to cook again.
He's not very good at it.
"Hey, I'm back. What are you making?"
He turned around and looked at me. He grinned.
Running towards me, he throws himself at me and wraps his arms around my neck.
"AHH! Eren what are you doing?!"
He buried his face into the crook of my neck, "You're back!"
I cautiously returned his hug. "Yeah....Why are you trying to strangle me?" He laughed at he lifted his head to look at me, still hanging onto my neck. "I'm not. I'm just excited to see you."
"Oh. Well...I'm excited to see you too." He smiled and continued 'cooking.'
He's pretty awful.

"Why are you making eggs? It's dinner time." He turned around scratching the back of his head, "I thought breakfast for dinner would be cool!" I raised an eyebrow at him.
"And.....I only really know how to make breakfast foods." He slumped his head down in shame.
"That's what I thought." I moved him out of the way and grabbed the pan to throw the egg away.
The egg didn't budge.
"Did you use any cooking spray or butter to grease the pan??"
"Huh?"
I sighed and put the pan in the sink.
"Hey! I wanted to make dinner this time!" I rolled my eyes at him, "First of all, you can't cook anything to save your life and second, I always cook." He accepted his defeat and watched me like a curious toddler while I cooked.

I've never had someone watch me while cooking so I was a little uncomfortable.

"Are you just going to stand there and watch me the entire time?" I asked him over my shoulder.
"Yeah."
I sighed again and continued cooking. After cooking for a while I felt hands on my waist and a head on my shoulder.
"What are you doing?"
"I don't know. I like watching you cook."
"I can literally feel you breathing down my neck." He giggled and rested his head on my head. "You're so short Levi."
"What?" I asked annoyed.
"I just think it's so cute!"
"Don't call me cute."
"But you are!" I could practically feel him grinning his face off.
"It's not my fault you're a damn tree."
He laughed. "Can you release me please and set the table. I can't cook with you suffocating me." He pouted at me, "Fine."
When I finished dinner I turned around to place the food on the small table I had in my kitchen. He did I good job at setting it.
He somehow found a lighter and lit a candle.
"Where did you even find a candle???"
He sat down and looked at me very proud of himself. "Well, I took it upon myself to take out the trash. Something shiny caught my eye in someone's trash bin and I found the candle. Pretty cool, right?"
I grabbed the candle and threw it in the trash.
"Hey!"
"Eren, you found that in the trash and put it on the table where we eat. That's disgusting."
I sat down across from him as I watched him continue to pout.
"But it was romantic..." He mumbled under his breath. I ignored him and we ate in silence.

"Levi," he said after we had both finished our food.
"Yes, Eren."
He looked down at his lap, "What are we?"
I paused for a moment.
I have no idea.
"What do you think we are?" I decided to say.
"I don't know...."
"What do you want us to be?"
He blushed. "I don't know...All I know is that I really like you..."
"I...really like you too....but I'm still afraid I will hurt you." He grabbed my hand from under the table. "Levi, I know you're scared but I don't want to leave you. Have you felt weird since...since that night?"
I looked down at my other hand. "No, but that still doesn't guarantee your safety."
He looked at me again with eyes full of desperation, "Can...can you at least try. Please. I can help you. I'll do anything to help. You can't live your life like this forever."

Maybe he's right.
Maybe I can work through this.
I don't want you to leave either.

I squeezed his hand, "Maybe....maybe I can try." His face lit up. "But if at any point I feel like I'm putting you in danger you have to leave, okay?"

He looked at me silently for a moment.
He stood up from the table and pulled my chair out so my legs were no longer under the table.
"Eren, do you understand?" I asked firmly, ignoring his odd actions.
He suddenly sat on my lap with his legs on each side of me and embraced me in a tight hug. "That won't happen. I know it won't."
I returned the hug, "You don't know how much I want you to be right." I clung to him for a moment-wishing to stay like this until my time comes.

Maybe one thing in my life can go right.
Just this one goddamn thing.

"Eren, look at me." I asked gently.
He hugged me harder.
"Eren, please." This time he listened to me. He broke the hug just enough so that he could look at me in the eye. His arms were still around me.
"If I ever try to lay even a finger on you, I want you to run away and call the police."
"But Levi I---"
"This is the only way I'll agree to take this chance." He stayed silent for a moment and looked at me with a different kind of sadness that I've never seen in his eyes before.
"Okay." He whispered.
I watched as a single tear fall down his cheek.
I quickly wiped it away.
"Don't cry, Eren. It's okay. Right now, I'm here. I'm here." I caressed his cheek with my hand as he cried. I could see the longing in his eyes and I could feel my heart skipping beats. I pulled him closer to me and kissed him.  It was a slow, sweet, kiss-definitely different from our first one.

I shouldn't do this.
I know I shouldn't.
I shouldn't risk it, but you make it awfully hard to say no, Eren.
You make me not think about my actions.
You drive me crazy.
But you also make me feel again.
I'm not numb anymore or frozen in time.
This time I'm going to go against my better judgment.

This time I'm going to be selfish.

Just this once...

...And decide to risk it for the slight chance that you can be mine.

Eren pulled away this time, "Levi, don't leave me." I grabbed him and pulled him into another hug.

"I hope with all my heart I don't have to."

A/N

Yo
Is this foreshadowing???
MUHAHAHAHA
I don't know...you'll have to find out. It feels nice having all the power in a fan fic for once. 

Extra long chapter because I have been slacking off lately.
Thanks for reading my fellow yaoi trash.
Peace out.