Chapter 20

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UNEDITED

*Cough cough cough.* River hacks her lungs out. It's 8:30 on a Thursday morning. She was supposed to be at work by eight but, there was just no way she could get up today. Over the last week, she has been getting sick. First, it was the sniffles, then it turned into a cough, then an added sore throat. Now today, her head felt like it was swollen, her nose stuffed, her voice hoarse, and her stomach sensitive. She couldn't even think about food, let alone hold any down. "Mommm." She groans out like a hulking man would. At least the tone of her voice.

"Coming." Lucille enters her bedroom dressed for work and smelling very highly of perfume. "Here you go" She sits on the bed and gives her daughter a glass filled with an old family remedy. A concoction so nasty you had to be desperate to use it.

She covers her nose and takes as many gulps as she can without gagging. After swallowing down the nasty taste she gives the glass back and cushiness herself on the pillow. "Thank you."

"Your welcome." Her mother stands. She worriedly watches down at her only living child. "You can't go on the camping trip this weekend."

"Of course I can." River's eyes begin to close down.

"Not if you're still sick."

"I'll get better." She mumbles.

"I hope so. For your sake. Anyway, I have to leave before I'm late. Are you sure you don't need anything else?" Lucille gets no response. Her daughter had dozed off already. She covers her up and leaves the house for the day.

It was around noon when River's eyes opened again. It was to the sound of the bell ringing. She slowly, although with much effort to move faster, makes it to the front door.

When she opens it, no one was standing there, but there was a brown paper bag left on the porch. She looks out into the distance and could see Ryan walking on the stone path back to the main house. She clears her throat. "Ryan." The horsiness not allowing her to speak loudly. He didn't hear her and kept walking. It was almost pointless at this point to try and yell again, so she looks at the ground where she kept her slippers, slips them on, and was about to try running; but like he knew, he turns back and locks eyes with her. Immediately, he starts coming back. That's when she notices his attire. He was dressed sharp like he just came from an important business meeting. He wore a black freshly ironed black suit and a sparkling white collared shirt. His hair jelled, wet, an slicked back and his facial hair was neat and trimmed just like always.

"Did I wake you?" He steps inside, brings the bag, and takes off his jacket.

"It's fine." She clears her throat as she closes the door. "Is....everything okay?" 

His brows lift in surprise upon hearing her. He automatically reaches out and checks her forehead for heat. "You have a fever." He releases a stressed breath.

She nods. "What..." She struggles. "are you doing here?" And why did she have to feel like a puddle when he touched her?

"Come." He puts pressure on her upper back to assist her back to bed, and when they get there, he tucks her in comfortably under the blanket. "I brought some oranges and lemons for tea." He then sets the brown paper bag on the bed. "I brought some other things." He pulls out four different bottles of liquid medicine, three different types of capsules, cough drops, vapor rub, nasal sprays, and placed them all on the bed for her to see. "I'm not sure what you needed... or prefer to use." He shifts his vision from the items to her. His gaze changes and settles on her features almost guilty. Like he was hurt; like it pained him to see her so unwell. Was it a pity, or guilt for the car window thing? She didn't know.

She glances down at everything he bought and wished that he just didn't. She wanted to scream on the inside. Why did he have to do this? Why did he have to be this way?" Why can't he just let her move on? If she had no self-control she would be belting at him to stay one hundred yards from her. Being around him, talking to him; him caring for her; touching her, it was becoming unbearable to handle. She wanted to cry she was so disturbed by this internal battle.  "You shouldn't have gone through all of this." She managed to say with her scratchy throat.

"Shhh.." He quiets her and leaves the room without a response. Minutes later, he was giving her a steaming cup of vitamin-C tea. "This should help with your throat." He pulls the chair from near her desk and sits by her side.

"Why are you doing this?" The love she feels for him is a stubborn thing, and if he didn't stop being there when she needed him, she was going to go insane.

"Shhh..." He shushes her again, then explains. "I heard that you were sick."

"I know...that you're here because I'm sick, but why?"

"River." He begins to scold. "Stop talking."

"Tell me why then." She didn't care about her throat right now.

He leans forward. Irritation had reached him. He drops his elbows on his thighs and pinches the bridge of his nose for a moment. "Because...I care about you okay. Can we move on from this now?"

"Why?" She needed him to speak the truth. The truth will set her free. Free from her feelings and thoughts about him. She hoped. All she knew, was that she needed to hear him say it.

His jaw tightens and his glare turns furious... "What do you want to hear River?"

"Why Ryan?" She coughs, which annoyed him more. "Why do you care for me?" At this moment she wanted to ask him to stay the hell away, but then she would have to tell him why. She couldn't live with the embarrassment of anyone knowing.

He stands and shoves both of his hands in his pocket angrily. His expression changed to annoyance and anger. Frustratingly, he rubs his nape and turns his back on her. She wasn't sure if he was going t answer her or not, but then he spoke. "Because..." It was through his teeth. "You're... like... a sister."

Things became drastically awkward. But there it was, and it stung. The words she needed to hear from the mouth she needed to hear them from. He sees her as a sibling and had pity for her dreadful past.

"I have to go." He sticks the chair back where he found it "Finish your tea, and get some rest." He orders before leaving. He didn't meet her eyes again, not even once.

Tears stream down her cheeks. She had a feeling that as long as Ryan is in her life, she would always feel this pain. She wasn't sure if she will ever be able to stop feeling this way. She sipped on her tea, that he so lovingly made for her; but stressed as on what to do. The tea eased her sore throat and she was able to fall asleep again.

This time when she woke, Landen had pulled the same chair Ryan did and was sitting beside her. He was a sight for her groggy eyes. "Hi." She smiles.

"Wow. You sound horrible."

She frowns. "You're... so mean."

"A cute horrible." He scoots his seat closer to the bed and sets his hand on her cheek "How are you feeling?"

"Better."

"I came as soon as I could."

"Is my mother home?" She asks.

"Yeah, she let me in. Don't worry, I'm not a creeper."

She couldn't laugh. She sits her self up and leans against the headboard. "Can you pass me one of those." She points to her honey and lemon cough-drops.

He grabs the bag and unwraps one for her. "Here." He watches her put the candy in her mouth and rests her weak head on the board. "I've missed you, Ree." He whispers. They haven't spoken since last week when he admitted his feelings.

"Me too." Her eyelids close down on her. They were heavy like led, and her head was throbbing. She really did miss him but just couldn't.

The next thing she knew, He was sliding in her bed near her and wrapping his arms around her shoulders. "Sleep." He encourages her as he presses her head onto his chest.

Her body wasn't giving her a choice to do much else.

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