Yes, Ms. Robinson : Book 1

Sapphire Baby

Soon enough we make it home, the babies aren't home however. Vera, Joss and Alan had them for the whole night. Not that I needed the alone time, I loved them all, I didn't need to be alone. I  needed the childish cries inside my ears and then the pain. 

I unlock the door and hung up my jacket while putting the keys in the key bowl. I hadn't talked to her the whole ride. I take my clothes off as I walk throughout the house towards the playroom upstairs. "what are you doing?"

"What does it look like? I'm going to the play room." I snapped.

"Ashley you aren't fully healed, you are stressed beyond what I can comprehend. You lost our daughter! You aren't thinking rationally! The last thing you need is to go in that room!" Eliza grabs my wrist. 

I go inside the room after walking up the stairs already. I blush when I hear her heels clonking up the stairs, knowing she's coming for me. Knowing she'll touch me and punish me! "I want you." I'm back inside our grey play room. It's been forever since I was in this room! I looked around taking many punishment objects. 

A few clothes pins, a whip, a flogger, a paddle, genital clamps and a blindfold. She's now entering the room. "do not abuse my lifestyle Ashley, you are not in control of yourself even!"

I turn towards her as we're only a few feet away from one another. "punish me." I demand. 

"No," she whispers, breathless.

"Why not? I scratched you, kicked you, slapped you, bit you, told you I hated you and cursed at you, why not?!"  I shout at her. 

She sighs before answering. "because you are distressed but I will not hesitate to take you to the hospital if you are going to hurt yourself." I didn't want to go back to the hospital or the loony bin. She threatened me. 

"Please just one lash, just set me free."

"I promised to you that I'd never hurt you." 

I get down on my knees. "please Mistress please, I'm begging you!" my eyes are hurting from the amount of tears I've spilled today. I landed kisses on her legs and upward now grabbing her legs, she gave me now mercy. When I came to look up she was struggling to be firm. I sent kisses to her lifeless hand, it dropped but was curled. 

She got onto her knees with me looking into my sore eyes. "you need help Ashley."

That wasn't what we needed to hear. I didn't need to hear that I needed help. I needed to feel the pain I was feeling. "no, no, no!" 

She nodded. "Ashley do you think it's good to cause shit to all these readers and the writer that you have so many damn problems?! Get your shirt together!"

(DID YOU GUYS SEE WHAT I DID THERE? LOL BUT BACK TO REAL LIFE)

She nodded. "Ashley we're getting married next week." what was she saying? What's going on?

I was having a panic attack right here... Right now. "what're you talking about?" I asked. 

Eliza was smiling in front of me, calm as ever with my face between her palms. "you need a new schedule. We need a new schedule to go about life, we need a balance Ashley and we are going to change everything."

She was right. We needed change, I had to move on. I could see that, why she needs to move it up when it was supposed to be next month. "tell me what to do please." I begged more. 

"You are going to keep yourself calm and be at your best behavior with me, I need you to try to be yourself well your best self. When we get married I will promise you that everyday for the rest of your life that your heart will heal. This isn't the end, it's only the start."