Destined Choice ✔

4- "Couldn't help myself."

AYU

I settled down to my friends apartment while my friend prepared coffee for me. If I went back to my pg then I would be loaded with a dozen of questions by the landlady which would become problematic. This was the best option for now. I brought my head to my hands and buried my face feeling ashamed of myself.

"I'm such an idiot... You idiot, you IDIOT!" I chanted to myself. Where did I leave my common sense behind when that was happening? Then again one doesn't need a common sense in that kind of situation.

I hated to admit it. Didn't want to but, it felt so good even if it was just a goddamn kiss. The way he responded to my urges, the way his tongue explored my mouth. It was like he knew how to respond to my body. There was no doubt about it. He was experienced and I was basically a part of his 'chain of girls' he hangs out with.

And that's exactly what I hated. I felt like a slut for some reason. This obviously wasn't my first kiss but I've never, ever kissed a guy I didn't share any feelings with (Well, I haven't kissed that many guys in the first place). Don't get me wrong, Jamie was a nice guy as far as I know. He had a certain charm to himself, but I certainly didn't harbor any romantic feelings for him. I was sure of that. Besides, I haven't moved on from my ex. I still kept checking my phone for his messages, for his calls, anything. I still waited for him near the 'chaat masala' shop outside our college. It couldn't be that he has already found someone else, right? God, I hope not.

The next day.

I saw Jamie standing in front of the Science building where I attended my classes. He was looking around everywhere except me. It was plainly obvious that he was waiting for me. Might as well greet him.

"Good morning," Jamie greeted me with a smile. Men will be men. They will make it seem like nothing ever happened in the past no matter how serious or awkward the situation might be.

"Yeah, morning," I replied, my voice coming out lower than usual. I couldn't help it. Just looking at him reminded me of our crazy night inside the car. I shifted my gaze towards the building before he realized me staring at his lips.

To my surprise he took a step closer, facing toward me.

"Ayu-" he started, somewhat hesitant. "How do I say this? We- we need to talk."

I noticed the look in his eyes, like he wanted to hold me tight and kiss my lips for hours. Just the thought alone stirred my insides. What the hell was he doing to me? He hasn't even touched me yet. I took a step back, almost instantly.

"Um, I need to go. Getting late for class. I- uh, I'll see you... later, maybe," I stammered out and ran past him quickly before I gave him the chance to say anything else.

When I didn't hear him calling back to me, a part of me was relieved.

A few days passed by. We barely talked to each other except for our usual greetings and goodbyes. But our short conversations didn't stop me from fantasizing about him. It was like he literally sucked the air out of me whenever I saw him. The more I met him, the harder it was to let him go without kissing or touching him. His voice, his lop sided smile, even his bare sexy neckline. Oh, God! Why was he affecting me so much? I needed to get a grip on myself.

And while I was busy controlling my hormones around him, something happened- something that changed everything between us.

I was busy with my classes as usual when my mobile phone beeped inside my bag. It was a message from Jamie. Getting anxious, I placed my bag, under my desk and unlocked my phone to read it.

Him: When will your classes end today?

Me: By 5 pm. Why?

Him: Good. Then meet me on the 3'rd floor of the commerce building. Okay?