Wild Side [h.s au]

Chapter 40

He climbs off me, dropping the knife and it clatters on the floor. "No no no. . ." he frantically glances around him before his eyes settle on me and he drops down to his knees, observing me as he takes deep shaky breaths. "What did I do- no, I'm so sorry. . ."

My chest is heaving, skin covered in slight perspiration as I clumsily kneel up, my arms coming up to wind around his shoulders, tentatively pulling him toward me, wanting to comfort him in any way I can, comfort both of us.  I feel his strong arms lock around my waist, firmly pressing me into him as his face hides into the crook of my neck, feeling his tears wet my skin.  I don't know for how long we stay like that, embraced silently as we slowly relax and calm down, finding comfort in each other.

He pulls away, glossy green eyes searching my face as his palms clasp my cheeks. "Please forgive me," he says silently, his thumb brushing over the reddened, swollen area where I was punched, making me wince slightly and he closes his eyes as if he doesn't want to see it.

"It wasn't your fault, Harry," I attempt to assure him. "Open your eyes."

Harry shakes his head and holds my face firmer, pulling it toward his, our foreheads pressing together as he breathes deeply. "I'm so sorry, I could've. . ." he pauses. "As long as you're alright. Tell me you're alright, please I need to hear it."

"I'm alright, see?" He opens his eyes reluctantly, seeing a small smile on my face. "I'm tough, don't worry."

"I know you are." His lips press onto the heated skin of my forehead, lingering there for a few moments. "Let's get you fixed up." He stands up, pulling me up with him, any trace of vulnerability masked with a determined expression, letting me know he wants to focus on anything else but talking about what has happened minutes ago.

He tugs at my hand and leads me into the bathroom with him, his eyes settling on the antiseptic and the supplies I've gathered from the infirmary and used to clean his wounds. "Sit up please," he demands softly, nodding toward a counter beside the sink.

I silently comply, my legs hanging over the edge of the counter as he prepares everything to clean my wounds, not that I have many. Besides the bruise forming on my cheek, the only bleeding wound I have is the one at the base of my neck where the blade has cut my skin. Luckily, I don't think it's very deep so stitches won't be needed.

Harry turns to me, his pale green eyes avoiding mine as he brings a cotton ball toward my wound, beginning to cleanse it, a stinging sensation making me hiss inaudibly, the result of the antiseptic. He's very focused and careful, his eyebrows pulled in a small pout, his free hand unconsciously holding my shoulder. When he's done, he covers the wound with a plaster, still refusing to look at me.

When he makes a move to get away from me, my fingers wrap around his wrist to halt his movements, making him glance at me with slightly widened eyes, immediately casting his gaze down. It breaks my heart to see him like this, my palms gently holding his cheeks, thumbs gliding over the curves of his cheekbones. "Please, look at me. Harry, it's okay, I'm okay."

His jaw tightens and he frowns, his pained gaze finally settling on mine. He steps closer, his hands gripping the edges of the counter on each side of my body, a heavy sigh escaping his mouth. "I hurt you. . . I did this." His index finger slowly traces the covered wound on my neck before he raises his ring clad fingers to gently brush them down my bruised cheek. "What have I become? Nothing but a monster. . ."

Now is my turn to frown and shake my head, my gaze firm, in vast contrast to his vulnerable one. "No. I'll repeat is as many times as it's needed. It wasn't your fault, Harry, if you could control it, you would never have done those things. I don't see you as a monster and neither does anyone else. I'll help you fight your guilt whenever I'm around and make sure to remind you you're strong and you're a fighter. Is that clear?"