I Told You Not To Fall in Love. ✔

XLIX - Last Goodbye!

"Jab maine paaya tujhe, kho diya
Dil aansuon ke bina, ro diya
Kyun khwaab aankhon mein aate hue door yoon ho gaya."

[When I found you, I lost you,
my heart wept without tears,
Why did the dream coming into my eyes went away like that?]

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

••| Chapter 49 |••

Playlist: Jaane Nahi - 3 Idiots.
Thori Der - Farhan Saeed.

Eleana:

There comes a time in your life when you become oblivious of everything, when all your senses seem to stop working, when you're not able to feel anything, when everything comes crashing down on you. That's what exactly I was feeling at this point of my life when I was perhaps breathing my last. I had never felt so weak and vulnerable in my life before. The room was silent and dark, horrifying the life out of me. I felt every emotion going past me as my life flashed like a sad and emotional movie in front of my very eyes. The smell of phenol and chlorine filled up my nostrils and I had to give my everything not to break down at this moment. Usually, when untimely death comes, you don't have to feel the pain. It comes like an unannounced guest and takes you away in an instant not allowing you to feel any emotion but when you know that you're going to leave soon, you're going to die soon and leave everything behind, even your most beloved ones, then there is no greater sorrow than this. I felt like the weakest soul that ever inhabited this planet. Here I was in the operation theatre, which could possibly be the last place I see with my open eyes, all alone. The creaking sound of the door alerted me as I saw Aryan entering in his casual clothes. His face held the look which broke my heart into further tiny particles if that was even possible. His face gave a look that read 'I am so tired of all this'. His eyes were all puffy and red as if he had been crying for really long now. He took slow steps towards me as I sat upright on the bed there. He clasped his hands with mine, intertwining our fingers together before kneeling down in front of me like a broken soul that could no longer pretend to be strong, that could no longer hold the burden on his shoulders and who just wanted to flee from here.

"Ena, don't do this to me." He cried in his broken voice. His shoulders no longer held the pride as they slumped down in defeat. His face could no longer look ahead. He could no longer meet my eyes. His head was bowed down as if he was ashamed to face himself.

"Aryan??" I looked at him accusingly as I cupped his face in my weak and trembling hands. I could feel tremors in my whole body. "You were my strength. If you will break, then how will I survive?" I whispered slowly, feeling vulnerable as he expressed his fears in front of me. Unknowingly, a tear slipped down my pale cheeks and he didn't wipe it away. That was enough to tell me how weak he felt at this very moment and how he was shattering slowly inside.

"I can't live without you Ena. I just can't breath without you. Whenever you're away from me, it feels like all my oxygen is gone. Why don't you understand that without you, I am no more? I love you so much to let you go away. I am too selfish Ena, I am too selfish." He cried as he accused me instead. "Ena, please don't do this to me. You can get through this. You can ease my pain, my suffering. Please come back to me."

"I can't do this Ena. I can't do this. I am too weak. I can't do this." He repeatedly said as he confessed in the most purest of the ways. Nothing seemed truer than his words that rolled off his tongue at this time and I just couldn't do anything to help him and ease his pain. I stared at his defeated figure in utter helplessness. At this time, I just wanted to scream so much, I wanted to cry so much, I wanted to accuse someone and blame someone for all my sufferings but nothing came out of my mouth. My throat went dry all of a sudden. I just couldn't do anything. We humans think that we are something very powerful and we are terribly immersed in some superiority complex that we can get anything we want but it's at the times like this when you feel that you're nothing but just a puppet of clay. Someday the clay will melt, the fires will burn everything and our once full of pride bodies would be returned to ashes.