Started With A Book: Fifty Shades Of Sang (Complete)

Chaper Eleven

~Sang~

No one says anything about the marks on my neck. No one treats me any different to what they did when I last saw them all properly, when we spent time together. Kota, Victor and Gabriel go on like nothing has happened when I know they know and I hate it. I hate they're ignoring it and not talking to me. I want them to talk to me and tell me what's going on through their heads. Especially Kota.

I heard him shouting at North and Luke while I was in the bath and I couldn't help but hug my legs and cry siloanedly. Eventually I got myself out when I heard Gabriel and Victor announcing their arrival, even though I'm pretty sure they arrived at least twenty minutes beforehand.

They were talking about me and not to me and that's what's bothered me the most because I simply just want them to talk to me and tell me what's going on.

I've tried on every item of clothing Gabriel has picked out for me to try on. I didn't complain. I didn't ask questions when he said he didn't like it. I didn't even tell him yes or no on whether I liked an item or not. I simply shook or nodded my head before walking off and finding something to look at. I can tell by Gabriel's sad blue eyes, Kota lips being in a hard line and Victor's eyes not blazing with fire that they know something is bothering me but I won't talk to them until they talk to me. Having a relationship works both ways.

I'm looking at a rack of different skirt when I feel a presence behind me. Inhaling slowly, I smile weakly to myself at Kota's spicy scent but I don't turn around or acknowledge him. He hooks a hand around my arm and starts pulling me towards the changing rooms in the store we're in. The place is pretty much empty except for someone at the cashier and someone stacking racks. When we get there, he takes us into a cubicle and closes the curtain.

"What's wrong sweetie?" He asks, his green eyes full of concern behind his glasses.

I blow. "What's wrong? What's wrong with me?" He nods his head even though right now I don't really care. "No Kota, it's what's wrong with you? What's wrong with Gabriel? What's wrong with Victor? Nothing is wrong with me but the fact none of you will tell me what the hell is going on through your heads. You're ignoring it. That's what's bothering you all right. You hate me because I had sex with Luke and North. You hate me because I chose them. The truth is, I didn't choose either of them. Luke was there and I wanted to share something with one of my nine boyfriends who I love dearly with my whole goddamn heart. And I shared a similar moment with North and damn you, Kota Lee, I want to share it with you too because I..." My words get cut of as Kota smacks his lips down onto mine, causing my inner lip to knock into my teeth but I don't care. I don't hesitate to kiss him back even though I am still angry and I'm sad and I'm hurt.

My hands dive into his mussed hair as I arch myself closer to him, wanting more. One of his hands, pulls on my hair but holds my face close to his, while his tongue dances and slides with mine in perfect sync. His other hand is pressed to the small of my back, pushing my arching body into him. Pulling back, he rests his forehead against mine and then rubs his nose gently with mine. "I love you so much it hurts Sang. I can't lose you."

"What makes you think you're going to lose me, Kota?" I ask, not understanding.

He closes his eyes and without opening them he says. "I love your innocence, Sang. It's what drew me to you. Were so much alike in our own ways and I loved that you were so much like me, yet so much like Nathan or Gabriel too. You share something special with each of us and your innocence was one of the special things you shared with me. When I knew I loved you and that you loved me too, I wanted us to explore all that stuff together. I wanted to learn with you while you learned too. I wanted us to learn together. But because of those books, I kind of feel like you've forced yourself into it."