Hide And Seek ~ Josh Dun

Chapter 51

After about thirty minutes of playing tag, everyone got so pissed off at how fast Josh was that we all decided to just go to bed. Josh pouted the whole way back, sniffling occasionally. When people would exit to their rooms, they would glare at Josh and he would whine loudly. Once everyone was gone, he looked up at me and smirked.

"They're all just super slow." He stretches his hands behind his head and groans. "That was a great exercise. So glad I decided to participate." He flashes me a lopsided grin and I roll my eyes.

"You do run super fast. If we ever get attacked by a killer you just gotta be sure to pick me up before running." His eyes flash as I say this. Seconds later, he is carrying me bridal style while running down the halls to our room.

"You're crazy!" I squeal into his chest, looking up at him as he runs. His eyes flutter down to look at me as he smirks.

"Crazy for you."

~~~

"Abby-Lynn. It's ok. Let's try breathing together." Josh watches me with panic eyes as my lungs refuse to collect any air. Every few seconds I can gasp in a shallow breath of air, but it doesn't really help.

Josh gently picks me up and places me in his lap. My back is against his chest, my head laying on his shoulder. My body feels so heavy, I just want to sleep. Josh shakes me and I look at him.

"Come on, Baby. You can do this. Breathe with me. Follow my pattern, ok?" His chest presses against mine, and then falls away a bit. He is also breathing close to my shoulder so I can hear it. I struggle to do it, trying my hardest. I can feel his hand squeeze mine and I look into his eyes.

I'm hurting him so much. He shouldn't have to see me like this, he has so many other things to worry about. Every time this happens be just looks more and more in pain.

"Stop thinking. Just focus on breathing baby. Ok?" Josh knows me so well. I start crying, and he picks me up, carrying me to the bathroom. Setting me on the floor of the shower, he turns on the coldness and I take a sharp inhale of breath. Quickly, he jumps in with me, rubbing my back.

My breathing comes out jagged, and it feels like it's cutting my throat apart. I don't want to hurt like this anymore.

A couple of minutes later, I'm able to breathe a little better, and I'm exhausted as hell. Josh turns off the water and lifts me up, placing me on the bathroom sink.

"Stay here." He says, wrapping a towel around me and going to the room. I'm too tired to even wash my body off. It's taking so much energy to even keep my eyes open. He comes back with pajamas in his hands. His eyes hold this sadness in them and I want to scream, because I know I caused it.

"Ok, baby girl. Do you need my help to get undressed?" He looks me in the eyes and I stare back, gently nodding. He says ok and clears his throat. He places me on my feet so I'm leaning against the counter and he is supporting me.

Together we take off my jeans, and manage to get my shirt off my head. I can tell how awkward Josh is now, so I tell him to turn around and to let me hold on to him. As quickly as I can, I change out of my bra and underwear and put dry ones on. After that he helps me get into the other clothes he brought in.

I smile as I catch a look at myself in the mirror. He brought me some gym shorts he had, and a long sleeved shirt. Taking a deep inhale, I can't help but giggle at the fact that I now smell like him. Josh walks me to the bedroom, and places me on the bed.

He takes some clothes and goes to change in the bathroom while I curl up under the covers. Closing my eyes, I focus on my breathing, just like Josh helped me to earlier. Minutes later he comes out and turns off the light, crawling into bed with me.

I lay my head on his chest and he holds me, rubbing patterns into my back. He's holding me a bit close to him, as if afraid to let me go. When he lets out a quiet shaky breath, I know something is wrong. Looking up at him, I put my hand on his face and wipe away the tears.

"I'm so scared of losing you, Abby-Lynn. I'm so scared. I need you to go to the doctors." Josh's voice cracks as he speaks and I can my heart slowly falling apart. He sounds so pained. I nod my head.

"Ok. After tour." I can feel his gaze on me, and it's burning hole in my skin.

"Promise me." I tightly close my eyes. "Promise me, Abby-Lynn." Gently, I shake my head. He jumps up to a sitting position, causing me to fall off of him. "Why not?"

"I don't like doctors, Josh. It's-"

"But this is serious, Abby! It's almost daily that you can't breathe or you have blackouts. It's terrifying." His voice is rushing, and he is breathing heavily.

"Baby, it's o-"

"It's not fucking ok, Abby-Lynn! It's not! One day I'm not going to be able to help you breathe and you know who will be stuck here with that pain? Me. Not you." With that, he quickly stands up and puts on a shirt.

"Josh, please." He grabs his phone off of the charger and grabs his wallet.

"I'll be back soon." And with that, he is gone.

When I run out the door to go after him, he is already gone. I can't help but sob as I make my way back to the room. I don't go to the bed, I sit on the floor by the door.

I sit awake for hours, waiting for him to come back. But he doesn't. Once the light comes through the window, I cry myself to sleep.