If We Just Lay Here // Dan Howell

Chapter 33

A/N Ooooh bombshell - will Phil let Dan go to Scotland after that skype call? This chapter will be in Phil's POV! You are now going to know how Phil really feels about all of this ;)

That was tough. There was no way I wanted to do that; how am I going to tell Dan that (y/n) said goodbye for good? Nothing can change her wanting to move on but I feel like it's my fault - I shouldn't have told Dan! I promised her that I wouldn't say where she was and I knew that she needed time to recover.

All of this has happened too fast.

I close the lid of my laptop covered in stickers and wipe away the tear rolling down my cheek. I get up from my bed and walk out of the door to my room. Dan's probably nearly finished packing and he's only going to make things worse by going to Scotland. I walk down the hall and turn the handle of Dan's door to open it.

"Hey Dan?" I call out,walking in.

I look towards the bed to see Dan and his suitcase both gone. Crap.

"Dan, are you in here?"

Still nothing. Thinking rationally, I grab the set of keys from the counter and run out of the hotel room. I quickly fiddle with the keys to lock the door and then I run down the darkened hall, in search for Dan. I reach the lobby and look at the clock on the wall, behind the reception desk.

It reads 12:05am

Great. It's now midnight and I have to go all the way back to the airport to convince Dan to stay here because (y/n) doesn't want to see him again. I rush out of the doors and as I go to pull out my phone to call a cab, one pulls in the gates. I know it's not my cab but no one else is out here and this is an emergency. I jump into the back of the cab and click my seatbelt in, wasting no time.

"Change of plan" I lie, "Can you take me to the airport please?"

The driver nods and begins pulling out of the gates. I just hope I can reach him in time.

~TIME SKIP~

The driver parks in a bay just outside the airport and I pull whatever notes of cash I have in my pockets and throw them to the front seat as I jump out of the cab. Running into the entrance of the airport, I look everywhere for my 6 ft. 4, brown-haired best friend. I know he made a huge mistake but I will stay by him because of the things he has done for me. Also, he is going to be so crushed once he knows that he will never see (y/n) again.

I run through the airport as fast as my legs will carry me and as quick as my reflexes will allow me to avoid the obstacles in my way. I reach a row of chairs where I see Dan sitting down with his elbows resting on his knees and his head in his hands.

"Dan!" I yell, running towards him.

Dan looks up from his hands.

"Phil?" He replies, standing up "What are you doing here?"

"You can't go to Scotland Dan!" I tell him, feeling incredibly guilty.

A confused expression appears on Dan's face and I know that he is owed an explanation but I can't bring myself to telling him the truth. Come on Phil. You have to and you know it. If you don't, Dan and (y/n) could end up hurt but on the other hand, they could make up if you let him. Oh, this is so hard.

"Why not? Don't you want me to apologise and win (y/n) back?" Dan questions.

Now he's asking questions! I have no idea what to do but my mind is all over the place and I can see Dan becoming less patient without an answer.

"Phil?"

"She said goodbye Dan..." I blurt out, sitting down.

"What?"

I look up to see Dan still looking confused with his eyebrows furrowed and his nose scrunched up. I take a deep breath and I sit up. I need to tell him the truth.

"(y/n)'s moved on Dan" I say, "We agreed that we needed to say our goodbyes and get on with our lives. She wants to forget it all and focus on her Mum. She needed to let go Dan and I let her."

I bow my head in shame as I know that I should've held onto her and persuaded her to let us stay in her life but instead, I let her go. It's all my fault and if Dan hates me now, I don't blame him.

"So...so she's gone forever?" Dan stutters, sitting down next to me.

"Yes Dan." I say, "She just thinks it's best to stop the constant heartache by not seeing us again."

"Are you serious?!" Dan exclaims, standing up.

Beginning to pace up and down the airport, Dan places his hands on the back of his head.

"Bloody hell Phil, I can't believe this!"

"I'm sorry" I murmur, "But what did you expect? She caught the person that she loves kissing someone else and found out her Mum is dying in one night!"

"I know Phil!" Dan shouts aggressively, "Stop reminding me! I feel like such a jerk and now there is nothing I can do about it because she's gone! I'm never going to see her god damn beautiful face ever again because I screwed up!"

Dan continues to pace up and down the airport and I can't help but feel bad from him. He's lost the only thing that meant something to him and there's nothing he can do about it. Then he stops. He removes his hands from the back of his head and looks straight at me.

"I'm going." He says.

"Wait, what?" I say, standing up from chair, "Going where?"

"Scotland" He says, "If you got the chance to say goodbye, so do I. I'm not leaving our friendship behind us with her thinking of me as a drunk monster. I'm not scared of crying in front of her either, I just need to let my emotions out and give her the last hug I'll ever give her. I'll never see her face again and I'll be left with something missing but at least I will have the chance to embrace her one last time."

I can just tell that that sentence coming out of Dan's mouth was difficult. He will see her face and simply hug her goodbye. Then, he will walk away knowing that he will never come into contact with her for the rest of his life. That's got to hurt. But I'm not stopping him. After all, he is right: after 10 years of friendship, he can't let it end on a bad note.

"Okay." I smile, walking towards him "Good luck bear. You do what's right and make the most of it."

We embrace for a moment and then we pull back.

"Are you going to be okay out here?" He asks.

"Yeah, I'll be fine! I'll meet you back in London in a week or so" I reply, "But don't worry about me - just focus on your last moment with (y/n). You never know, you may just bring her back with you."

Dan smirks and waves goodbye as he walks out of the same exit that (y/n) did. It's just a shame that neither of them will enter it again.

A/N Ooooh that was emotional. Do you think Dan is doing the right thing? What will the outcome be? Comment below and don't forget to vote if you are enjoying this! Thanks ~ Katie