Video Games [Kellic]

Chapter 26

3k + :) -Rach

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I wake up and instantly let out an annoyed groan, why the fuck does this day exist? I literally have no one to spend this 'joyous' day with.

April 24th, also known as my 18th birthday, my main plans were to spend the day with Vic, he had it all planned out and now that's definitely not happening.

I roll over on my bed and grab my phone, pulling out the charger and rolling back over, my back feeling weird.

I unlock my phone and look through my phone, scanning over the 'happy birthday' messages, one name catching my eye.

I open the text and read it over and over.

Viccy Poo - I know, I fucked someway, I always do and I know you probably don't even want to hear from me, but I remembered that it's your birthday, so happy birthday Kell, sorry once again, have a great day.

I feel really bad but I still haven't thought about the fact that Vic is Dickturd, I've kind of blocked it from my mind, finding anything to distract myself from it, usually destruction of things around me.

I sprawl out on my bed and put my phone on my stomach, sighing and closing my eyes, breathing heavily.

It was so tempting to text him back a simple "thank you", but I knew that wasn't an option. If I texted him back he would think we're suddenly friends again, as he was a fairly naïve person.

My feelings for Vic were hard to explain right now. Some days I absolutely hated his entire being. Every single thing about him made me despise him. I couldn't stand to hear his voice nor look at him without getting frustrated or angry. Then there were days which I just wanted to practically jump on him everytime I saw him. I wanted to kiss him repeatedly and tell him I'm sorry and then just forget that all this happened.

Then there's days like these, which I don't know what I feel. Just numb. Maybe that's because of the little assult from my mother last night. I hadn't stood up against her since that time those few weeks ago. I probably would, but I didn't have the effort. Lucky, the only thing I gained was, a now healing, bust lip.

I was brought out of my thoughts by my phone buzzing against my stomach. I look down to it before picking it up, unlocking it.

Viccy Poo - Listen, Kell. I'm really sorry. I didn't know it meant that much to you. If I knew I would have stopped. I swear. You mean too much to me and I don't want to lose you. I understand it's your birthday and you'd probably rather be at a party with your friends than talk to me. I'm just really sorry. You probably have better things to worry about than me, so I'll let you get on with it. Sorry x

My eyes tear up but I just blink them away and let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding in and lean over my bed, pulling my backpack towards me and pulling out my lyrics book with a pen.

This is way I've been getting out my feelings, I've never finished a full song, I've only got one verse for each song, two being about Vic and the other for my deadbeat father.

Met a guy at seventeen
Thought he meant the world to me,
So I gave him everything,
He turned out to be a cheat.

He didn't cheat on me obviously but I feel like he cheated in game but he definitely meant the world to me and he still does, not that I'm going to admit that out loud.

True friends lie underneath,
The witty words I don't believe
I can't believe a damn thing they say anymore (anymore)

Lie! Lie! Liar!
Liar, you'll pay for your sins

Lie! Lie! Liar!
Liar, you'll pay for your sins.

This verse is kind of obvious, he lied to me, he had known about the whole xbox thing, he knew damn well how I was reacting to it and yet he continued to lie to my face even when I confronted him about it and if I do ever forgive him, it's going to be hard to believe everything he tells me, because I don't know what else he's lied about.

Father, father, tell me where have you been?
It's been hell not having you here
I've been missing you so bad
And you don't seem to care
When I go to sleep at night, you're not there
When I go to sleep at night, do you care?

This one is for my father, even though I hate his guts for leaving me, I miss him, just like I still love my mom and the person she was before left with him, if he came back, I have no idea what I would I do, I just hope that he has a good reason for walking out on me and my mom.

Our family's story was a difficult one. When I was born my mom and dad were happy together, until I was around the age of ten. We used to travel around a lot, due to my dad's job. I had no clue what it was, and still don't know. That's besides the point though, we moved a lot and soon we chilled out in Mitchigan for about a year. We had all settled in nicely. I started to make friends at my school and everything. I was happy then.

It all went to shit when we had to move again, to San Diego where we currently live. We moved of course, but after that I found MySpace and became an emo. Like, is MySpace even a thing anymore? I didn't have any friends other than Matty and it mad me sad. My parents were arguing non stop, and then one day he just left. I remember hearing the door slamming behind him and afterwards my mom's sobs. She was never the same after that night.

Although, I don't know who's to blame. Is it my dad's fault for walking out on us? Or is it my mom's for pushing him enough to leave?

It was both of them, they both fucked up in some way, you can never put the blame on one parent, they're both as dysfunctional as me.

I look over at my clock and realise it's 5 pm already, oh how time flies when you're moping in your bedroom on your birthday.

Mom went out this morning, I know that because I heard the door slam and her car door slam shut, let's hope she's not coming back tomorrow.

I get out of my bed and make my way downstairs, walking into the kitchen and noticing a note.

Kellin. I'm going over Brad's for the night, happy birthday.

I shrug and rip up the note throwing it in the bin and grabbing a bottle of water, sitting on the counter and zoning in and out of reality.

A loud knock at the door startles me and brings me out of my thoughts, I jump off the counter and walk towards the door, not bothering to check who it was before throwing the door open, tears instantly building in my eyes.

"Kell, before you slam the door in my face, hear me out?" Vic pleads, earning a weak nod from me, the box in his hand catching my attention.

"Well, I want to say happy birthday first of all, and then I'm sorry okay? I didn't mean for it to affect you the way it did, I didn't expect you to break things because of me, I just thought you'd laugh about it but I remembered all the times you spoke about how important playing COD was for you, even though people told you every time that it was just a game, it was your way of coping with all the shit in your life and I don't know what to do without you Kell! I'm just so sorry that I betrayed your trust like that, I really am!" He finishes, sniffling slightly and passing me the box, smiling at my confused face.

"Happy Birthday and I'm sorry."