Endless Love

30

I woke up about 12:30am from the noises outside, I fell asleep on the couch with the TV on and I realized the Giants made it to the Super Bowl. Usually when things like this happen, it's endless noise outside so I know I won't get any sleep. I heard my phone vibrate, I looked at it and it just so happened to be Josh. He's probably been blowing my phone up since he won.

"Yes Josh?"

"We won, we're going to the bowl!" He said screaming in my ear along with all the other chants and shouts I could hear in the back.

"I know I seen it on TV."

"Can I come see you? I'm kind of outside your building with a bunch of people screaming."

"Why are you even walking in the first place?"

"That's what our team does, we go party with the fans." He said hanging up the phone and I shook my head.

"Please don't let him come up here drunk." I said stretching out along the couch and I could hear him stumbling down the hall and laughing at himself. He bursted through my door and nearly tripped over my boots.

"Liyah my beautiful wife!" He said trying to walk over to the couch.

"And I was right."

"About what?"

"I'm not your wife Josh." I said laughing and he laid his big self across me, I could barely breath by the way he fell on me. "Move your big ass."

"No, I wanna sleep on you leave me alone." He said taking his wallet, keys, and phone out his pockets and handing them to me. I sighed and looked at how stuck I was and tried to move, but he just kept grabbing me in his sleep, he was sound asleep within seconds. I tried to close my eyes to fall back asleep but his phone kept vibrating in my hand and it would wake me up everytime. But when I looked at who was calling each time, it was the same name, which was Sabrina. I didn't wanna answer it but I feel like I should, he was drunk and maybe whoever this was needed him for something. But then I thought you know what, let me not just incase they decide to make me angry, but then the phone buzzed again, but this time it showed voicemail.

"Josh, wake up." I said to see if he'd get up but he was sound asleep. I shook my head and pressed voicemail, I might as well take a chance.

"I just wanted to call and tell you the results came back. I keep calling you cause this is important, we need to talk about this. I know you said you were confused on something and you were torn and so am I but I need to tell you these results so then hopefully everything can come to an end with us."

I kept the message there and wiggled until I was able to push Josh onto the floor. Who was Sabrina? And why did she say he was 'confused and torn'? I know Josh and I don't date, and I'm wrong for listening to his message but I don't care how wrong I am, he was gonna wake up and tell me the truth.

"Why you push me Liyah?!"

"Who's Sabrina?" When I said her name it's like he snapped out his drunkness. "And what results was she waiting for?" He laid there and didn't say nothing, which was getting me heated as hell. I got up and went to the kitchen. "You wanna act like you can't answer me?" I said banging a pan on the kitchen counter. He jumped up and wiped his eyes, looking at me.

"Liyah really?! You really gonna attack me with a pan?!"

"I might because you never tell me anything! I always have to find things out on my own, so yeah I might if you wanna act like that."

"Why tell you about her if you'll just get angry?"

"Josh, it's like you don't remember. I dealt with everything when you were with someone else. I'm not Naomi I don't get angry at everything, you can actually talk to me." He shook his head and put his hands over his face like he was hesitant. "No matter how bad it is, I listen, you know I was never the type of person to not listen if something was going on."

"I know and I'm sorry. Nothings going on, she's a girl I kind of dated like two years ago. She was with someone else, so it was like a triangle, like our situation. We had a good bond, I don't know if I was in love with her, I was trying to fill voids when you were gone so I was straying to any person I could, she was the only person that would listen at that time. It didn't feel like anything we have, I wasn't protective of her or anything like I am with you, so I don't think I was in love with her. The results thing, I slept with her the day before I first seen you, I thought she was what I'd probably have to settle for because it was like you were gone we never crossed eachother, but then that day it made me realize maybe I was wrong, I seen you and my world shook, and I knew I'd try and get you back, everything felt okay for me again."

I put the pan down and turned around the opposite way so I couldn't see his face. I wasn't mad at him, I just didn'tlike to cry in front of anybody. I wasn't there for a few years so I don't expect him to just do nothing or had met no one else.

"The results was for a pregnancy test, cause we didn't use anything I was drunk, like I usually was when I slept with her. I kept her a secret from you cause I didn't want you to feel heartbroken like she's before you, I'm not in love with her."

"You said you didn't know if you were or are in love with her Josh. The message says you were torn and confused, you both were. I'm guessing she's still in her relationship."

"And if she's pregnant it won't change anything, I still won't know if it's mine, cause she is still with the guy. Or if she's even pregnant I don't know. Then whatever the outcome I need you two to meet, so she'll know you're who I wanna be with."

"No Josh, you don't even know where your feelings are with her. I don't want you to cut something off because you just see me, that could be the love of your life."

"Don't say that-"

"She could be, maybe there's so much history and damage with me you just can't be with me. Maybe you aren't in love with me, maybe seeing me was telling you to finally say goodbye-" He walked over and stopped me from talking.

"Don't speak so negative, you know I'm in love with you Liyah you are the love of my life I been trying my hardest to get you back, and stop crying I love you, I don't like to see you cry." He said grabbing my head and kissing it. "Everything's gonna be okay." When he said that all the previous times came creeping back in my mind with Naomi, and how all of that went. I couldn't be in that situation again with Josh, I couldn't be the second choice or better yet between two people again. I pushed myself away and walked towards the door.

"Can you just stay here with Lily. I need- some fresh air, I need to take a walk." I said wiping tears from my face and putting on my boots and hoodie.

"I'm sorry Liyah. Please don't feel heartbroken I want everything with you, I been trying to fix things with you, you're all I ever wanted." I stopped and stared at him and then looked back out into the hallway, putting the hood over my messy hair.

"Maybe it was always too good to be true." I said walking down to the elevator. I cried all the way down to the main lobby and outside walking my way down the lit up streets of New York. Snow started to fall and I kept walking, nothing was bothering me right now, it felt like I was by myself all over again, just like the day of graduation. "Maybe it's just too late."

Hey I hope all is enjoying, thanks for the reads and comments! ^.^ Just wanted to say look out for the next chapter cause a tragedy happens, won't say who it involves. :o Update in 5 days, might be less. c:<

- Love you alllll. <3 :p