"I have grown to care for every bit of him. But, he hasn't seen me, for I know he only considers me an impending wall. I tried my best to be near him but he shuns me with an immense force." Hermione Granger was staring at a distance, casting a Profe...
He couldn't take his eyes off the chair where she sat before he closed everything for the night. He could still somehow see her pale, angelic face that showed nothing but pain and desolation.
He watched his little apprentice quiver with both fear and lamentation as he forced himself away from him. He had spoken words of prejudice, again. And to whom? To someone, he had grown to like and treat as his equal. He shook his head trying to remember how he and Lily met. It was just the way everything happened. Two beautiful moths are drawn to an enigmatic flame letting their curiosity overpower their beings. No wonder they were both Gryffindors. Both stupid, trusting, impulsive, hypersensitive, playing heroine all time, loquacious, reckless, impatient... and... and...
Kind, sweet, passionate, loyal, caring, and good. So good. They possess the qualities anyone will ever ask for or find in a friend. But him, portraying the insouciant harmful fire, burnt their wings and left them dying on the dusty cold floor. He didn't mean to hurt them at first, it was something he never wanted to do. But then he looked deep inside himself and came to a terrifying realization.
He pushed them away because of his cruel words and bitter actions. He was the one who spoke those unforgivable words. He was the one who faced them with cold, stiff expressions. He was responsible. He was to blame. It was true. It was really true.
He closed his damp eyelids and wiped the water which left his dark eyes. He tossed the glass of Firewhisky to the monstrous arms of the burning flames from the fireplace. The shattered transparent crystals were glowing in the faint, rhythmic light. The broken glass reminded him of the hearts he captured and crushed with his own bare hands. He was a monster. It wasn't a word to describe him. It was simply him.
❄
She woke up early the next morning her eyes still carried the tiredness from her crying sessions the previous night. The fresh tears which caressed her pink cheeks still laced across her face, dried and scorched. Her eyes were as lifeless as an Inferi or someone whose soul had been removed from her vessel.
She was in a lost even though she knew where she presently was. She was looking for something but doesn't know what's the thing she needed to find. It was true, she had a different manner of expressing her happiness and deepest grief. She wasn't the one who mastered the science of speech power and wisdom, so she found comfort under the soft felted sheet of paper who gained control of her innermost thoughts.
Even though she couldn't say it to him, what her heart truly voices, she was no coward. It just so happen that she was just and content on how the things go as they were. She didn't want to meddle with it, for she feared a single act of hers can initiate a succession pile of events filled with devastations. She had done those things multiple times already. She wouldn't make another foolish mistake.
She took her quill out and a fresh piece of parchment from her trunk. Her things were accessible enough for her since she was all tidy and organized. She took a deep breath before her quill bled ink to the smooth paper.
Your eyes are always searching and lonely. Your heart was raging but silent in disguise. I wanted to touch your hands and kiss your lips even in the face of dreams. If your eyes could speak, what would it say? Speeches had already faded and lost its brilliance. Nothing was needed to be said.
Our memories could somehow bring me back to my senseless self, make my life easy and ease my pain but during the times of realizations and awakenings, the parting and leaving part make me feel alone and helpless again. Hold me, hold me without judgment or question. Tell me your stories in life and I will listen to each one fervently. Tell me you love me even you're just saying the words. Stay with me and embrace me tight. I won't ask whoever is in your mind or if you're imagining her when I am in your arms. Let me love you even though you couldn't feel same as mine.
Tell me now, how can I not love you? How can I unlove you? Teach me so I can be able to free myself from this paradise and live in the reality where I belong. Teach me to learn how to see you as no one and nothing more as someone needed to be treated with courtesy because of your position towards me. Teach me to feel nothing when you come my path like the I way I seem to you.
Teach me. Help me.
She placed the parchment on her nightstand before she took another paper from her trunk. She wasn't going to write silly scribbles or essays this time, for she was going to write her resignation from her Potions Apprenticeship.
❄
Professor Snape was leaning against his desk touching the glass barrier that keeps him away from the woman he loved, he loves and will love forever. But when you see his expression as he touched the old frame, you would say it somehow seemed that he was literally touching her face. He was sobbing silently as he watched her smile from cheek to cheek and wave her hands to him.
"Why do I still miss you after all these years? I still can't forget what happened. It almost felt as if it occurred yesterday. I still miss you... I still need you..."
His cries were endless and unbearable to watch. He was suffering from a dear old love-one who only saw him as a friend.
"If I called you back, if I hugged you then... Pray, would anything change? Would our lives be markedly revised? If I said I love you would you come back? Would there be any difference, would you have stayed? How would I know? I never tried. It never happened. I was too late to win you back. I was too late to win you back!"
He felt his eyes drifted close but he didn't bother to open them up. He was in his prime of emotions, again. But he didn't care. No one should care. Before he could fall into his slumber, he blurted these words that his apprentice would never want to hear.
"I love you, Lily. With all of my heart. Always... "
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