Piano Man

29~ Is It Love?

Adrian

After everything that has happened we decided to continue with the wedding planning so we can get it done and over with. Adeline was pretty stressed out as we planned and I yearned to take her stress away. When I found her huddle on the couch suffering a headache I itched to take care of her. I itched to hold her and I did. 

I held her in my arms as I worked, she was fast asleep. The comfort of her soft snores and deep breathing almost lulled me to sleep until Hades barged in almost waking Adeline. I glared at him for almost waking her and he noticed she was asleep in my arms. 

"Shit, man I didn't know. I just came to drop this off, it was sent to the warehouse instead of here." Hades whispered as he handed me an envelope. 

The envelope was sent from my parents. Inside were hand written letters from both of them, my mother wrote saying she heard of my engagement and coming wedding. She wanted to congratulate me as she felt she didn't deserve to be at the wedding. Fucking Astrid spread the news of my wedding and now it's everywhere. I didn't bother to read my father's letter as I knew it had something to do with his concerns over the mafia. I tried to ignore the thoughts that ate me alive about all the things that could go wrong on that day. She deserves to be happy that day and not have to worry about something ruining it. 

As I typed out plans for the next few shipments, I could feel Adeline's breath get lighter as it traveled down my neck. She was awake and continued to bask in the closeness. I pulled out a chocolate bar from the second drawer in my desk where I always kept a stash of candy for Meg. I split the chocolate in half offering the other half to her. I had to stop working as she lifted her face from the crook of my neck to eat the chocolate. I missed the warmth of her cheek on my shoulder so I gently pushed her head back down into my neck. 

I pulled her closer this time and I told her to rest more. She didn't want to rest and got up instead, ever so slightly brushing my groin with her heel. It was accidental but with everything going on in my head about her I gave her a dark gaze. A warning for her not to do it again. She ran away from my gaze to go to the kitchen where she said she was stealing snacks. She was going to have it coming for her for taking Hades' beloved snacks. 

After she left it was so silent that I could hear the clicking of the keyboard as I typed. All I wanted was to hear her gentle snores that blocked out any other sounds. I wanted to hear her sighs of comfort when she dreamed. I wanted to hold her again as my arms felt empty without her. I've never felt this before and I can't wrap my mind around how surreal it feels. In less than a few weeks she will be mine in a different light. Oh, the things I'd do to make her love me as I have fallen hard for her. I would get on my knees and beg for her to love me back. 

I couldn't deal with the overwhelming feelings of not being near her and showing her that I have fallen for her. I'm completely surrendered to that overpowering emotion. The one that drives me straight to her, she draws me in, messes with my head, leads me to a dead end whenever I think she's close to giving in. I've tried from day one to make her accept that she's stuck with me through the contract, but I don't want it that way anymore. I physically had to stop typing and shut down work mode. 

I found Hades wandering the house slacking off, "I need your help." I lowered my voice. 

"Capo, what did you do? If it's that bad that you have to whisper to me, I'm not helping." He put his hands on his hips speaking loudly.

"Shut the fuck up and come to my office where I know no one can hear." He followed in suit, skeptical. 

When I made sure the door was locked and closed I spoke again, "I don't know what's going on with me...from brother to brother now, I'm in some deep shit and I can't escape." I confessed.

"You love her, don't you? I knew at some point you would let it consume you. I watched you become attached to her." 

"Fuck, Hades. It hurts, she's ripping my heart out and clouding my thoughts. All I can think about is her and she doesn't know how much I care." I continued to confess. 

"She needs to know. She's sitting there lost in her thoughts drinking my chocolate milk. I don't know how I can help because I don't know shit about love." Hades addressed, upset about his milk. 

"Do I let it play out and suffer watching her live here without knowing the feelings I have for her?" 

"Yes. I think she needs time to accept her own feelings. She finally accepted that this is her new home, it will stress her if you confess to her now. I would wait a few more days." Hades replied and he was right. 

"Right, I guess I should. Anyways get back to work, make sure Ilya is okay with the recruits." I dismissed Hades. 

He left me alone to be consumed by what could and couldn't be. I don't know why I asked for love advice from a guy that doesn't know what love is. Yet, his advice made him look like he's been in love before. I know for a fact that he has never been with a girl in that way. We practically grew up together and he was a damn player in his younger years. I'm surprised he hasn't caught an STD once.