Love, Not War (Book 2)

Chapter 109

Felix scoffed, shaking his head, not believing Jisung could speak like that. "You lost the right to look out for me the second you disappeared Sungie."

Jisung gasped in disbelief, staring at Felix like he didn't know him. He realised that Felix wasn't ready to hear a single word against Chan and even if he would listen, it would be only after Jisung explained himself.

Guilting Felix would not work either. Felix had changed a lot. He wasn't that naive arrogant teenager anymore.

Jisung realised he had to come clean. The plans he made were already in shambles. "Felix, you know you're my best friend and I would never let anything harm you," he said. "So can you just trust me on this one? Listen to what I have to say okay."

"If it involves nonsense about my boyfriend, then I don't want to hear it," he said. "You know what, post those nudes okay? Tell your friend that I will never leave Chan and he can do whatever the fuck he wants. The world thinks I'm dead anyway so it won't affect me. As for you Sungie, I never want to see you again."

Felix turned to leave but Jisung quickly held him back by hugging him from behind. "You can't say that to me Lixie," he said, his voice shaking slightly. "Y-You can't mean that right? I'm sorry okay? I won't do it. Just don't leave me like this."

Being hugged by his best friend once again made tears pool in Felix's eyes. It was already hard enough to hear crap from him. Now he's begging. Felix didn't have the heart to reject him.

"You know I'm telling the truth Lixie" Jisung continued. "Deep down, you know what I'm saying is true. Chan took your nudes and made sex tapes of you both which he released on the internet but blurred himself so no one would know it was him. Back then, a lot of people were homophobic. Including your parents and it ruined their reputation. It ruined you, Felix. You had to be hospitalised for weeks and you hadn't even recovered from the trauma of Aera's death. Chan made you suffer Felix. He destroyed your life then and he'll do it again. Why can't you see that I'm trying to protect you?"

Jisung's words brought back memories deeply hidden in Felix's brain. His mind was hazy but he could hear the cheers and applause when his parents were called on stage. He could remember feeling anxious but it wasn't because he was about to give a speech. He had done that lots of times. It was because he had a feeling something bad was going to happen.

Chan wasn't picking up his calls. He didn't want to talk to him. In fact, Chan was sitting with some other people he didn't recognise.

Felix was already crumbling and Jisung could see it. He knew that it all bothered Felix but Felix was trying to put up a brave front and keep calm.

But calmness wasn't the emotion he was looking for in Felix. He wanted Felix to break down completely so he could be the one to put him back together in his own way. He believed Felix was destined for him.

"You know I'm saying the truth Lixie" he continued. "Chan doesn't love you. Your parents murdered his parents and that's why he used you to get revenge. You loved him with all your heart but he betrayed you. He betrayed your love. He betrayed your trust. He made you a laughingstock of the entire world."

Hot tears rolled down Felix's cheeks as his memories were being pieced little by little. The pain he felt then was now ten times worse. He could remember nearly going insane in the hospital. Wanting to see Chan for an explanation. He never once believed that Chan could be behind everything.

Jisung pulled away from Felix and signalled Beomgyu to play the video and instantly. Felix heard the sound of someone moaning. He raised his head and there on the wall of the abandoned building was his video being played.

He was dressed in a maid costume, an expression of pure ecstasy on his face as a blurred figure of a man ploughed in and out of him repeatedly. His moans quickly turned to screams as he begged the man to go slow, quivering and shaking on the bed.

It was as if that dreadful night was happening all over again.

His father was so mad he punched him. Felix collapsed on the floor as if he felt the punch again. The building was empty save for the three of them but to Felix, it was packed with people, laughing and pointing at him.

"So the son of the Lees is gay."

"This serves that little brat right. He toyed with my daughter's feelings."

"I hope he burns in hell."

"We'll see how the Lees handle this."

"They can't deny it. That brat is very recognisable. Who asked him to dye his hair in such a unique colour."

"This is karma."

The comments mixed, warping into background noise as he stared up at himself in the video. Even though the person was blurred, he knew he had never been with another man but Chan.

It could be no one else but Chan.

The pain Felix felt was indescribable. It was a combination of the past betrayal and the present. He felt as if his heart was being wrung like a piece of clothing and his lungs were being crushed, preventing him from breathing properly. He was crying and shaking.

"Do you still not believe me, Felix?" Jisung asked, staring at Felix who was having a panic attack. "Do you still want to go back to the man who betrayed you? Who used you?"

Felix couldn't even hear him. He was reliving his worst moments and the searing pain he felt left him broken. All of a sudden, he looked sickly pale and thin.

He could recall when Chan stared at him with dead eyes. As if he meant nothing. He could remember confronting Chan in his house and Chan looked at him the same way as he uttered those words; "I don't love you and I never will"

"Fuck" Felix cried. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck you, Chan!"

Jisung smirked. This was exactly what he wanted. He bent low and gathered the weeping Felix into his arms. The poor boy was shaking uncontrollably as he cried. Jisung tried his best to soothe his pain but nothing worked.

Felix just wouldn't stop crying. He felt like a big fool. All along, Chan never forgave him. He was just looking for an opportunity to hurt him again. As if that one time wasn't enough. No wonder his mom was against their dating. No wonder she was so mad when he supported Chan. He never knew he was supporting his enemy.

Little by little, rage overcame the sorrow and pain he felt within. He was breathing hard and all he could think about was revenge. He wanted Chan to hurt like him. He wanted him to feel the pain he was feeling. He wanted him on his knees, crying just like he was. He wanted to punch the motherfucker in the face.

Felix broke free of Jisung's hug and stood up. He wiped his tears with his shirt as he stared up at the video that was still playing then he scoffed. "Bang Chan, I'll show you what it means to mess with Lee Felix."

Jisung was elated. He could totally help Felix with revenge. "Felix-"

"Don't think we're good Jisung" Felix said, cutting him off. "You might have shown me the truth but our discussion is far from over. I know you have other motives for showing up now but we'll get to that later."

He then turned to Beomgyu. "I'll break up with Chan like you want, Beomgyu."

Beomgyu beamed, completely psyched that their plan worked.

"But you'll never have him" Felix stated, which instantly wiped the smile off Beomgyu's face. "You'll never be able to be with him because I'll never let Chan love another person. I do not care if he ever truly loved me or not but I'll never be his nor will I let him be with anyone else so release the videos and pictures if you want. As I said earlier, I'm already dead to the world so I don't give a fuck."

With those said, he turned away and walked out of the abandoned building.