King of the Don's

forty six

After she was done eating, she rubbed at her chest and made an uncomfortable noise.

"I'm feeling full. I'm going to try to get him to eat again." She told me, and unstrapped the baby from my chest.

She went upstairs to Atticus' nursery, and I went into my office to return a phone call to Miles. I had only been in my office for an hour, when Miles was interrupted by my office door flying open. Briar's cheeks were wet with tears, and I immediately stood up from my desk, ending the phone call, "What's wrong?"

"He started breathing funny, and I could see his rib for a few seconds, and google says he needs to go to the ER." She looked up at me with her wide eyes.

I stood quickly and gave the baby a quick once over, looking for any signs of distress. He seemed to be breathing fine.

"Baby-" I started, and she shook her head.

"Vaughn, I'll never forgive myself if something happens." She cried. "Please. We need to go."

Briar

I was sitting on the exam table with Atticus.

Vaughn was across the room with the doctor, both of the men speaking lowly to each other while occasionally looking back to take a peak at me. Saying I was embarrassed was beyond an understatement.

I knew I was the topic of their conversation. This was our third visit to the ER this week alone. And just like the other three times, nothing was wrong with the baby.

Vaughn patted the doctor on the back, "Thank you again, Dr. Bowman. We appreciate it." He told the greying man, and Dr Bowman nodded his head at both Vaughn and I, and then left the room. Vaughn let out a deep breath as he approached me, and he bent down on his haunches right in front of me, "What's wrong, baby?" He asked in such a sincere voice that I wanted to cry.

I felt tears come to my eyes as I started my spiel, "Atticus was breathing funny-" I tried, but he shook his head, "Atticus is perfectly healthy, baby. It's not him I'm worried about. What's upsetting you?"

My mouth opened and then shut again, and Vaughn ran a hand down his face, "I don't mind you taking him to the doctor, Briar. But this just cannot be healthy for you, sweet girl. What's bothering you? Why do you feel the need to take him to the doctor this much?" He asked.

This recently became hard topic for me.

At first, I thought I had the normal new mom anxiety. But then my worry began snowballing, getting worse and worse each day, making it hard for me to breath when Atticus did the smallest thing. And it was so hard for me to admit, because I didn't want Vaughn to think I was insane and not take my concerns seriously, but this was getting out of hand, and I needed to voice myself to Vaughn, and let him try and fix it.

"I'm just so worried about him," I let out heart wrenching cry, and Vaughn took the baby from my arms, and placed him in the bassinet the hospital provided. He pulled me off the exam table and into his strong arms, and held me firmly to his chest. "I just, I never had medical attention when I was a child," I began, and I felt tears flood down my cheeks, "My eardrum burst and I went deaf, and my dad didn't even care. I remember how terrible it was, and how much pain I was in. No one even seemed to even notice. The only reason I got taken to the doctor was because I wouldn't stop crying." I tried to breath, but was choked in another sob. Vaughn held me tighter, and after a few seconds, I continued.

"It was just a simple ear infection," I let out a sniffle, "If they had just given me an antibiotic, just some Amoxicillin I wouldn't be deaf. Then my dad acted like it was my fault I couldn't hear, and shoved me into a closet every chance he got." I harshly wiped away my tears, "And then, whenever something else happened, like my arm getting pulled out of socket because he yanked me too hard when I couldn't hear him, because he thought I was faking it." Vaughn continued wiping my tears with his thumb.

We were both silent for a few beats, Vaughn adjusting to my words as I let out the words I had never said before in my life.

I never had anyone who cared enough to listen.

"I just don't want something to happen to our baby because I didn't want to ask for help, especially medically." I finished, and I looked up at my husband after my emotional rant, and what I saw stunned me. Vaughn was crying too.

He wasn't sobbing like I was, but a few lone tears were streaked down his face. He held onto my head, cradling me against his chest. "I love you, my beautiful, strong little wife." He kissed my forehead, and neither of us said anything after that. There was nothing left to say.

•••

Thought?!
Only a few chapters left :(