Under This Roof

Chapter 35

The models start going out one after the other. Marcus, Steph and I are holding hands and trying to watch some people's reactions from the screens on the inside. 

What we worked on for so, so long is ending in few minutes. When the last model walks the runway, that will be it. No more worrying about this, no more preparing for it, nothing.

I wish the excitement of these few minutes lasted longer, but it ended so fast. And I felt... empty.

We make our way to the stage at the end and are introduced. We salute the audience and my eyes land on Claire. I look next to her at Harry, he looks back and smiles so warmly. They all clap and their faces make me feel so happy. I do not know how I would felt without them here. I am sure I would be very happy. This whole event, my participation in it, standing in front of all these audience after our collection was presented, all of this is a huge milestone in my career. All of this I have been waiting for a so long. I am not undermining the importance of this whole event. But I think it would have felt much different if I was standing here alone tonight, with no one here just to celebrate me. Sharing this event with them has been as important as any other part of it.

We leave the stage and go back to our room. All three of us hug so tight and congratulate each other. We congratulate the models for doing a great work and thank them for everything. Then we sit together to watch the rest of the teams on the screen. Every now and then, it strikes me that it is really over. 

The reason I came to London. The reason I chose Harry's apartment. The reason we met.

It feels hard to say goodbye. 

"Are you okay, Lauren?" Marcus' voice stops my running thoughts.

"Yes."

"I was telling you that it's done, we need to go now."

We go out of the room. I look at vast hallway with doors to rooms that feel miles apart from each other. Every door is being opened, three or four people going out, and then closed. My team is just the same. We go up the stage where the host thanks us one last time and announces the end of the event. After that, people leave the hall to another one nearby where they start to talk, drink and socialize.

I search for my friends first. When they see me, we walk towards each other and I can see, even from far away, the way Harry is looking at me. And it is giving me goose bumps.

I approach each of them starting with Liam to shake hands and kiss. When I turn to Harry at last, he puts his hand on my waist as I approach to kiss his cheek and pulls me closer. Before he moves his head back, he whispers in my ear: "Could not sleep the night waiting to see that dress on you, and it was worth it."

When I pull away, it feels to me that everyone in the hall can now figure out exactly what Harry has said if they take a look at my face.

We spend some time chatting, they tell me what they thought of the event in general and our work in particular. But they are not experts afterall. The experts, the real ones, are standing just across from us. Robinson and few other designers, some of them I recognize and others I do not, as well as some experts from magazines are chatting near the table opposite to where we are standing. I am looking at them, waiting for the right moment to introduce myself and wondering how to do it. I am sure that every one participating will introduce him or her self to these experts at some point during the night. How can I stand out? Even if our collection stood out, that would not be enough. Because I did not come up with this collection myself. It was a team work. So how can I stand out?

"You should just go for it." Claire tells me.

"No. I shouldn't just go for it. I need to plan it. This has to go perfectly."

I stand there silent for few minutes. I am waiting for the right time to leave them and go. Then I decide to talk to other people first, get myself going. So I leave my friends discussing different people's outfits; in a fashion show you see quite a bit of everything, and go.

I join a small crowd of people and introduce myself. A couple of them were also participating in the event. There is one designer, Angelo Moretti, who I have heard a lot of but did not recognize and a couple of people who work in this sector. One of them is a fashion business owner; similar to NARAH, and the other is a textile designer for Pierre Cardin. We talk a little bit about the event. One of them mentions that he found our collection unique, and Moretti agrees with him which boosts my confidence a little bit. But not much, the collection alone is not enough.

However, when we move on to talk about where each of us work, I am very surprised and happy to know that Moretti used to work for NARAH. Now this information, about a person who made it from exactly where I started, really boosts my confidence.

A little later, I notice that I got too taken by the conversation and have not yet made any move to introduce myself to Robinson. So I excuse myself and leave them, giving them my business card before I go.

Always hand out your business card at the end of a good conversation.

I take a deep breath and finally approach Robinson's crowd. I talk very smoothly as though nothing amazing is going on. But in the back of my mind, I am really scared to screw this up. Robinson is in general dry in talking and answering. She is the least to talk or react during the conversations. When I mention anything and look at her face, I cannot tell if she finds it impressive or extremely weird. There is simply no way to tell from her face.

When I leave her crowd after some time, I feel absolutely blank. I guess I had pretty high hopes anyway. There was no way Robinson was going to shake my hands and say "Oh Lauren, please join my team, I loved your collection."

But you know how dreams are. And my dad once told me: I want my daughter to keep her feet on the ground but her head in the sky. I do not want my daughter's dreams to be small.

So I aim high, but keep my feet on the ground every time. And it has been working pretty well for me. When I hit, I make big jumps; like joining NARAH directly after my graduation. When I do not, I am not very disappointed; like what just happened with Robinson, I guess.

After moving around and meeting different people and the other teams, I am now ready to finally go home.

Home.

With Harry.

As we leave the hall, Harry puts his hand around my waist all the way outside. When we stop at the front to wait for the car, He pulls me a little closer. Harry's timing is perfect. His hands are my weakness. He can tell how he is making me feel, like always. And the only thing I can tell is this:

Harry, in every sense and meaning, is bringing me home tonight.