Under This Roof

Chapter 28

Claire needed to leave and I kept stalling. I did not know what was waiting for me at home.

I cannot see Harry yet. Not before I have something to say to him.

I truly just need some time to figure out what to do.

Nevertheless, there will come a time when I will need to go back. So I drop Claire home and go.

When I enter the house and notice that Harry is not there, I am a little disappointed. I do not want to face him. But I also really want to see him.

Harry has been very honest about his emotions. So I think to myself that maybe I need to learn how to do that, too. Without wasting a month thinking about every little word he said.

Wasting a month. The thought strikes me.

Today is the 6th of September.

I no longer have a month.

Harry kissed me yesterday.

Part of me wants to take advantage of every second here and spend all my time in his arms. And another part me wants to run away as far as possible and not to see him ever again to save myself from all that is to come if I do not.

As long as Harry is not home, I am in no rush to decide which option I am choosing. Once he is here, the fight in my head between Romantic Lauren and Logical Lauren will start.

I take a shower and go to the living room. I put on a show and, very smoothly, feel myself drifting asleep on the couch. I do not stop myself. There is nothing I need more than a good nap.

****

"Lauren." Harry's voice is fuzzy.

"Lauren." Again.

I feel his hand on my shoulder and jump. He takes his hand away and holds it up in defense.

I keep looking at him not understanding why he woke me up.

"Two reasons." Harry says, as if reading my thoughts.

"First one, it is 4pm in the afternoon. I got home at noon and you were already asleep. So you have been asleep for at least four hours."

Well I was awake the whole night, Harry.

"And if you stay asleep, you won't be able to sleep through the night." He continues.

I won't be able to in all cases, Harry.

"And the second one is that Conall is coming. He will be here any minute now. I would have asked him to come into my room but Zina's probably with him too. Can you imagine Zina coming into my room?" Harry asks, supposedly to make me laugh. But a part of me gets a bit jealous when I do imagine that. I live here and I have never been into his room.

"I'll just continue my nap in my room." I finally say, my headache starting to hit hard.

"Are you okay?" He asks.

"I'm alright. I have a tough week coming up. It is fine if I sleep more than the normal average for this final weekend." I try to talk casually.

"Of course it is okay. In fact, I urge you to continue sleeping." He says smiling.

I get up and leave the room. When I get to the living room door, Harry calls after me. I turn around.

"It broke my heart to have to wake you up on the first time that I see you asleep."

Harry is now the well-dressed professional manager of the circus taking place inside my heart. Every jump, every act, every fire, Harry manages all that.

****

I am unable to fall asleep again and decide to go sit for a while with Conall and Zina. Simply because I have no better plans.

Zina and I do not have many common interests to talk about. Nevertheless, Zina is very interested in fashion. Not that she could see herself pursuing that for a career -to be honest, based on our conversations, Zina probably does not see herself pursuing anything for a long period of time. But she could still talk and discuss fashion, which was enough for me to spend a fine time.

Every now and then, mine and Harry's eyes meet. After those seconds, it would take me a long while to get back to what Zina is saying.

The more Zina and I talk, the more I wish I was spending this time with Claire. Since her and Liam got together, it became harder and harder to spend the weekends with her. But since she is in town and not going away for the weekend, I decide I will call her and make plans for tomorrow is she is up to it.

As soon as Conall and Zina leave, Harry puts on his shoes and his backpack and mentions that he will be back in an hour.

I call Claire and tell her that I would very much like it if we could make plans.

"We were actually thinking, Liam and I, if maybe we could go to an escape room. There is a new center nearby college that I have been passing by lately. It looks worth a try. Would you be into it?"

"I think I would, yeah." And I could use the distraction too. If Claire and I go out anywhere alone, we would probably redo today's morning conversation the exact same way.

"Great. I'll talk to Liam about it and text you."

****

I bring my sandwich to the living room and pass by its window to sit down. The curtains are open and my eyes move a fraction of a second to the outside. I am about to continue walking when I realize what I just saw. So I stand still in the living room for a moment, watching.

Harry is standing on the sidewalk next to the house. He is facing the window so I try to stay out of his sight. In front of him, there is a tall blond girl with very short hair in a long black coat and heels. I can only see her back, but am pretty sure I have not seen her before.

Who are you?