Seventeen Oneshots

Verkwan 19

"Okay. Got my eyes on the target, he is heading inside the banquet.. Champagne? Typical."

'Give us the target's appearance'

"I thought you already knew that? Whatever, he's 5'10, almond brown hair, slicked back with one strand somehow down. He looks like Leonardo Dicaprio, but a somewhat walmart version of him. No one is more handsome than Leonardo Dicaprio. He wore a black suit, an awkwardly green-colored tie which doesn't really suit him at all. His pants are of an oatmeal white color and black fancy shoes"

'Got him. Alright, whenever you're ready'

"Alright, got my M24 ready. It's executing time. So sorry, sweetheart, you should've just attended our movie night instead of fucking around with some woman"

"Your movie choice sucks anyways. Really? 'The Fault in our stars' for like god knows how many times"

"How- You were inside the banque-"

"Got a doppleganger, worked out fine apparently. How could you not know your own husband, sweetie? Thought you knew me better than myself?"

"Okay.. first of all, fuck you, 'The fault in our stars' is a masterpiece. Second, I thought you love it.."

"Oh I do, sweetheart. I do. Now, drop the gun and let's go home, yeah? Let's watch that fucking movie again"

"You're insulting my favorite movie, asshole. You suck!"

"Put the gun down, sweetheart."

"No"

"You won't dare, I know you won't"

"Well, maybe you don't know me as much as I know you? I can, and I won't hesitate to"

"5 seconds, if you don't put down the gun, you'd wish we watched 'The fault in our stars' instead"

"I wouldn't be here if you didn't sneak out on me, jackass! If we're doing it this way, fine! Your music taste is ass, I used your mixtape as firewood in our camping date and you sing so bad that I want to put a bullet in my ear whenever you do!"

"5.. That hurted a lot. Didn't have to go that far. Fine, well I think you're annoying. You're so moody, you're always unsatisfied about every single thing that I do and I want to strangle you in your sleep every fucking night because you keep cry-singing to every single heartbreak song ever"

"Well, I hate you! Your fashion taste is so bad, I get a migraine every time I look at your outfit. Even now! Why the fuck would you wear that god-forsaken tie?! I should've burned it after our honeymoon!"

"4.. It's my favorite tie, how dare you. You gifted this to me on my birthday, you said it was special so I wore it every single time I went to a fancy party."

"I gave it to you because it didn't suit me, and I didn't have any gift for your birthday at that time!"

"You lied to me."

"Says you! Why didn't you tell me you're a mob boss? You even lead the most powerful mob in the country!"

"Wow! Well, I'm so sorry, Mr. Saint. It's not like you didn't lie to your husband about being an assassin and tried to kill him because you were paid to, which by the way, I already knew"

"Wait.. what do you mean?"

"I did a background check on you after our first date. I found out you were adopted and both of your dads are famous assassins. The person listening to us bicker right now is your Daddy Jeonghan. Hi, father-in-law."

"Wh- Then, why.. why did you ask me to marry you?"

"Business. I thought maybe if I marry you and make you fall in love with me, I can manipulate you and your agency into perfecting my plan, and it worked. It's also because if you fall in love with me, you wouldn't be able to assassinate me"