The albatross journey

64 - Unexpected surprises

Sanem

I had come to lose all hope, I had given up on him and us, I no longer believed that it was possible to rebuild something from the rubble Can had left behind when he left.
In the past, I had always been the one who persevered and stayed without giving up, but this time I had given up, I was convinced that there was no hope for us anymore.
But here we are, together.
It feels like a dream, what we have now is even more beautiful than it was at the beginning of our love. Everything is more intense, more visceral, perhaps because having experienced the absence of the other at first hand, we live each moment as the most beautiful gift.

Once the campaign for Zarafet was over, Can did some photo shoots with Dream Eye while I completed the last projects for Hyal Etmek before we moved to Izmir together.
I still can't believe it, it seems incredible to think how my life, our lives, could take a direction I could never have imagined even a few months ago.
I feel like I'm daydreaming, every day our relationship seems to become more intense, what we feel for each other becomes deeper, more mature and the passion that unites us is an endless crescendo. Now that we are finally free to love each other without fears and misunderstandings, I feel that I am even more in love with this Can who is not afraid to express what he feels and who does not miss an opportunity to court me and spoil me.

We are now ready to leave Ankara and this refuge from the world on the shores of the lake, which has seen us return to love, will forever be a magical place for us and not only for us.
Aziz and Mihriban, likewise, have found each other again and rediscovered themselves more in love than ever.
It is wonderful to know that love, true love, knows no age or distance and that, even decades later, it is capable of finding a way to reknit the threads of a broken feeling.
I thank Allah that it didn't take years for Can and I to find each other again as it did for them. It is only thanks to him that this miracle was able to take place; if he had not stubbornly followed me all the way to Ankara, I believe there would have been no chance for us.

I have already packed all my things and sent them to Izmir, to the flat we rented in a residence overlooking the beach in Cesme. I can't wait to be there with Can, spending hours on the beautiful terrace just hugging each other and watching the sea.
But first we will go back to Istanbul for Layla and Emre's wedding, and I will miss not being able to live with Can, sleeping next to him every night, wrapped in the warmth of his embrace.
I know that my parents would not approve of what I'm doing, but after risking losing the man I love, I don't want to be away from him any more, I don't want to live a single moment without Can.

On my last day at the agency, the guys from Hyal Etmek surprised me with a farewell party, I was deeply moved by the affection each of them showed me and I will miss them a lot, I'm sure.
Everyone was very surprised when, at some point during the evening, Hakan and Dilara announced their engagement. I was overjoyed for what I started to consider dear friends, I can't believe I had no idea there was something going on between them, I was probably too caught up in my own heartache to realise what was going on around me.

Hakan's greeting was touching, he pulled me into a tight hug then pulled away and looked intently into my face - Are you happy now Sanem? Was it worth the risk of suffering only to find that you could be happy again?

I smiled as I remembered his words from months ago, he had indeed captured the core of the problem, my closure towards Can for fear of suffering was probably condemning me to a life of torment and regret.
I couldn't stop myself from squeezing him again in a grateful embrace - You were right Hakan, it is much better to risk being happy than to be sure of suffering for the rest of your existence -

It was Dilara's voice that interrupted my spontaneous gesture of gratitude - Sanem Aydin, do you think you could take your hands off my recently become boyfriend and decide to come and hug your friend? -