The albatross journey

40 - Jealousy

Can

What I'm telling you is the pure truth, I'm looking deeply into her eyes so that she can grasp the sincerity that I'm sure shines through, because I can't and I don't want to hide what I feel anymore, not from her.
Now I am fully aware of how precious every moment I spend with Sanem is, from now on I want to enjoy the magic of each encounter, every word, every look, every touch.
She looks at me for a long time without uttering a word, I know that my words have touched her as I am sure she has appreciated the flowers, those wild flowers that she loves so much to pick and with which she creates her essences, those flowers that are simple and yet something unique and wonderful just like I think she is in my life.
I'm trying in every way to make her understand how I feel, how my eyes see her and how my feelings for her only increase in intensity at every moment even if she is far away from me, as happened in the Balkans and in these months that she has been here in Ankara.

She stares at me in silence without withdrawing her hand which is still clasped in mine, it is a magical moment in which our glances linked together say so much about how much feeling still unites us. The approach of a boy from the crew who asks where the temporary dressing rooms are to be installed interrupts a moment that could have been the beginning of something, perhaps a turning point in our relationship. I see her shrug, withdraw her hand from mine, take one last look at me and, without saying anything, follow the cameraman to show him the precise spot she has chosen.

We are here to work, but I can't believe that I finally have the chance to tell her and slowly show her with a thousand cares how dear she is to my heart.

Soon we are both busy with the final preparations, while the sun rises high in the sky the photo shoot gets underway, the models are prepared and I start shooting while I have one eye always on her. Even if my gaze is behind the camera and I can't see her, I can always sense where she is exactly, there's nothing to do, ours is too special a bond to be severed, even what has happened between us in recent months can destroy it, I'm sure.

The morning passes quickly between shots and changes of clothes, I'm already thinking of the best way to invite her to lunch when I see Hakan Demir arrive with his assistant, Dilara I think she told me her name was. They stand next to Sanem, I see them talking for a long time and she's smiling in response to their words, I can't help but feel a tinge of annoyance at the idea of that man having the right to be so close to her, I hurry to take the last shots scheduled for the morning to join them.

The first one to see me arrive is Dilara, a beautiful girl with an open and contagious smile who, since the day before at the agency, has been instinctively nice to me.
- Merhaba Can, how is the filming going? -
From the way I've seen her confabulating with Sanem, it seems they are good friends, maybe I could find a good ally in her, who knows, I smile back.
- Merhaba Dilara, good, everything is going well thanks to Sanem's perfect coordination everything is going on time and in the best way -
Hakan answers by putting his hand on Sanem's shoulder making my blood rush to my brain.
- Sanem is always very attentive to every detail, with her you have the guarantee that everything will go smoothly, she is irreplaceable. That's why, since it's lunchtime, I've come to pick her up to take advantage of the break and have something to eat together while we take stock of the other campaigns in progress, her employment here on the set of Zarafet was a sudden decision and we have a few things to discuss regarding the work in progress at the moment, shall we go Sanem? -

- Sure, let's go, are you coming Dilara? -

- No, thank you Sanem, I'll wait here and then we can discuss what I'll tell Mr. Yildirim in the meeting this afternoon since I'll be replacing you. Can, you'll have to eat something too, right? I know a place near here that has great fried fish. Would you like to come and join me?