World Gone Mad (TMR fic 3)

Chapter 13

"What?" Minho says, launching to his feet. "Some of us are dying?"

I agree with his fierce tone of voice. It's a lot to take in. Immunity to the Flare? No cure?

"At this point, yes," Rat Man answers. "But, with your cooperation, we're optimistic we'll be able to develop a cure in time to save those of you who aren't immune."

No one speaks. I don't think any of us are even breathing.

"How about I just get this over with? Those who are not immune are," he pauses for effect, "Newt."

And my world splits in two, cleaving in half as I watch the scene in front of me without seeing any of it.

I can't hear the other names. He could have said my name for all I know. All I can hear is the one fatal word thundering through my mind again and again.

"Ash?" Minho is giving me a worried look that borders on terror. I wonder what I look like, sitting completely still, my hands white from how hard I'm clenching them.

"Who- who else? After Newt?" I ask, my voice a croak. "I couldn't hear."

Minho bites his lip. "No one you're close to. Ash... are you..."

"If you ask her if she's okay I might be the one to punch you," Newt says softly from my other side. I can't tell how he's reacting.

"Okay," Minho says, dropping the subject but still watching me intensely. I wonder if he's pushing away his own emotions by focusing on whether or not I'm going to snap.

Which I am.

My moment arrives several seconds later, when Rat Man is a step or two closer than normal, when he turns to address a sobbing girl from Group B.

I didn't know I could launch myself over three rows of chairs so quickly. I go from sitting perfectly still to scrambling to attack him in seconds. Unfortunately I'm blocked, by none other than Teresa. She slams into my side as I dive on Rat Man, tackling me to the ground.

"You little-" Rat Man snarls, pausing for a moment to regain his composure. Teresa lets me get up and I stand, shivering a little from the furious man in front of me. I want to kill him, but Teresa would never let me and the girl is good at fighting.

Newt isn't looking. At me, at Rat Man, at anything. He's sitting there staring at his hands. I have no idea what he's thinking. WICKED as good as murdered him. This isn't any different than the vision they gave me of him dying. Maybe that's what will happen to him. I'm still reeling, unable to process, unable to fight anymore.

I want to tear WICKED into pieces, but I'm too broken.

"Do you want to fight us, Ash? Do you really?" Rat Man says, pieces of spit flying towards me from his intensity. "We could take everything from you."

I can feel the fear rip across my vision, almost like a tangible thing. I see a boy murder a Crank because his sister had a gun to her head. I see Newt, looking up for the first time, and I can tell he's crying. I see the pain on Minho's face, Thomas's anger.

WICKED could destroy me. So I have to pull myself together and behave, do everything I can to get an edge so that I can destroy them first.

"I'm sorry," I say, trying to look ashamed. "I was just... shocked. And hurt that you lied about so much."

He gives me a hard look. Apparently, I'm not as convincing as I'm trying to be.

"Very well," he says after a moment. "But behave yourself."

I nod, the movement tense and jerky. "Can we get our memories back now?" My voice is small, broken. I hate it.

He gives me one last look. "Alright. Come on."

"What are you doing, Ash?" Minho hisses as we follow Rat Man down another corridor. I mark it in my mental map. "We can't trust them to return our memories."

I shake my head, not bothering to look up. I know all three of the Gladers walking with me won't let their heads get tampered with. Not by WICKED, not again.

"I have to do this," I say. "It might be the key to getting us out. You guys hold tight, I'm planning something. Just... stay alive, and if you have an opportunity... take it, I guess. I'll be doing what I can."

"What do you mean?" Newt asks. I know he wants specifics, wants rules and a plan. A plan I don't have, although I'm sure I'll figure something out.

"I don't know yet. But I have a good feeling about this, okay? Or... maybe not a good feeling, just a less-awful feeling."

Thomas snorts, and I smile slightly. At least I made someone laugh. Newt is practically stomping with frustration, so I don't expect him to be enjoyable company for a while.

I'm not sure what's wrong with him, but he just learned he was dying, so I can't really blame him for his black mood.

Maybe it's the Flare.

Maybe I don't want to know.