💔 Right Here Waiting 💔

895 42 63
                                    

CW: Mentions of alcohol

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Oceans apart day after day
And I slowly go insane

Day 1:

The warm sunlight poured into the room and made Sarawat glowed in an elegant hue of yellow and orange. His back was facing the windowpane, his arms extended and his fingers felt for Tine on the empty half of the bed.

Tine, come back, please.

They got into a big fight the night before. He didn't filter his words appropriately before spatting them on Tine aggressively.

"Maybe you should find someone who is capable of helping you, career-wise, just like him, not a loser like me."

The hint of agony that flashed through Tine's face in that split second knocked some senses into Sarawat. Sarawat tried to take a step forward and Tine withdrew himself from Sarawat, until his back leaned against the bedroom door.

That was all Sarawat needed to understand that Tine wanted to run away from him. Tine packed some of his things into a duffel bag and left their apartment, without sparing a glance at Sarawat before leaving.

F'ck pride, f'ck ego, f'ck jealously. I just want you to come back.

As much as Sarawat wanted Tine to stay, he knew that he would eventually let Tine go. Even if things were to go back to normal, they wouldn't be the same anymore.

Tine's hollow voice and piercing last words were still ringing consistently in Sarawat's mind.

"Wat, trust is like an eraser, it gets smaller and smaller after every mistake."

With that being said, Sarawat was left alone to deal with the mess he had caused.

Dim came to Sarawat's apartment 3 days later as no one could get in contact with him. The manager of Ctrl+S had to drag Sarawat out of the crumpled bedsheets and pour a bucket of ice water to wake Sarawat up.

Sarawat knew he needed to move on, but he wanted to hang on to the pain Tine had left behind. He would never see Tine again, perhaps, unless Tine had forgiven him. And the only thing he could cling to, was the messy emotions Tine gave him, he didn't want to pick the broken pieces up and move on so easily. He wanted to remember this painful lesson. He needed to.

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I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain

Day 30:

Tine's fingers were ghosting over the name in his phonebook, hesitating if he should call Sarawat. He had a very bad day at work today, Fong was out of town and the only person whom he could talk to was, ironically, his ex-boyfriend, Sarawat.

Should I? Should I not?

He didn't realise that he lowered his thumb subconsciously, he dialled Sarawat's number when he was still in trance.

When Sarawat's phone rang in the middle of his practice session with Ctrl+S, Dim pretended to squint at him sinisterly. He hadn't been in the right headspace since the night Tine had left him. It has been a month since his heart was punctured, the words he threw onto Tine were like boomerangs, that travelled back to where they were fired out.

Who the hell, oh, it's Tine.

Sarawat quickly put his guitar back to the guitar stand and slid to answer Tine's call. His heart was thumping loudly and he felt his body temperature rising despite the air conditioning unit in the studio was working just fine. He was half-expecting Tine to shout at him, or to at least release some anger onto him, but there was only an eeriness from the other end, only Tine's light breaths were heard.

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