oh, captain. [DISCONTINUED]

31. Stay

"Dedicate your hearts!" The Commander roars out, as the large steel gate rises beyond our heads. We all salute, and rush out through the gate once it fully opened and headed our way.
Mike told us to stay close to him.

"Captains girlfriend, eh?" Mike said to me, as he tilted his head backwards.

"Yeah, haha" I say, followed with a little laugh.

"He's told me a lot about you, I think he-"

"Uh sir," I interrupt, "There's a titan coming in on our left, at a really fast speed."

"An abnormal this close? Connie, black signal flare. Everyone head in more right, I'll try and distract it for now."

"Yes, sir!" We all say in unison and we gathered closer into the center. I looked back to see Mike doing a good job of defeating the titan, until I suddenly watch as the titan grabs his equipment by the string and slams him onto the the ground. My heart is racing and I panic, so I steer left.

I have to save him, he's a great leader here, one of the strongest. If I die doing so, it wouldn't have been a waste.

"[Y/N]! WHAT'RE YOU DOING?" Connie yells out to me.

"I have to save him! We'd have a bigger chance with him around us!" I scream back.

"You're gonna get killed don't do it! Please!" Connie hollers back.

"I'm sorry." I bellow, as I go full speed towards the titan. I see the titan then lay a hand on Mikes weak body.

Quicker horse, go faster!

I reach within 10 meters of the titan, and quickly grapple myself onto its body. I head right for the nape to take it down in one shot.
I get so close, right there, as an explosion of red, blood sprays out everywhere.
It got him..
Mike...

I go into full shock and distract myself completely from getting the titans weak spot.
I failed, I reacted too late, it's all my fault.

I zone out, thinking about how I messed up, as I feel a tight grip around my body. I couldn't move. I couldn't even try to save myself.
I refocus and look beside me to see a titan with it's mouth wide open.

Well, here's the day.
I love you Jean, Connie and Levi.

I get covered with darkness until I hear a loud grunt and cutting sound. A hand then appears and grabs mine instantaneously, pulling me out.
Connie was here, I'm surprised he didn't leave me to die.

"Never make those impulse decisions again. I've already risked losing you twice now, I can't do it a third time. Now, get back on your horse, he stayed waiting for you." Connie mentions as he brings us towards the ground.

"Thank you, all I wanted to do was save him." I say getting onto my horse and rushing up to our group again.

"And you tried your hardest. Just don't scare me like that again." He replies.

We hear a loud noise, all look up and see a blue smoke signal.

"Retreating already? What a waste."
I say, as we all turn around and head back.

As we make it back to the gates, the Commander then gathers us all into an area to discuss. He told us to stay in the groups that we ventured outside of the walls with.
We watched him start to count, as he stops on our group.
He looks at us in disbelief, and murmurs out the words,
"Mike..."
I tilt my head downwards to look at the floor.

"Sir! Mr. Mike Zacharias was taken from us by an abnormal. By his sacrifice, he had saved us many members and bought us lots of time. [Y/N] tried to go and save him, but by that time it was too late, and she almost got eaten so I came to finish the titan off. We are terribly sorry sir." Connie says with his fist on his chest, and his eyes closed shut.

Erwin Smith let out a large sigh.
"Thank you both for trying."

I raise my head up and salute to him.
"Of course." I say.
___________________________

The Commander then told us we were free to go for the rest of the day, so we jump off our horses and put them back in the stables. Connie and I then walk over to Jean, while Connie keeps his arm around my shoulder, reassuring me none of it was my fault. We make it to Jean, and he asks immediately,
"Hey, what happened out there?"

"I watched him die, I didn't help at all, I just made Connie risk himself to save me and I- I just.." I can't finish talking as my eyes start to fill up with tears, thinking about how I was no use, I could be used as a decoy.

"No, no. Hey, it's fine. You tried, okay?" He says with a calm voice, as he pulls me in for a warm hug. He stroked his hand on my back as I dig my head into his shirt.
"I'm just glad you're okay, [Y/N]."

"I mean, I almost wasn't" I say with a laugh, wiping the tears off from my face. I hear Jean chuckle, as I look behind him to see Levi gesturing for me to come over to him.

"I'll, be back, maybe." I say to them as I stroll off. As I come closer to him, I feel queasy, my stomach feels weird, and I get all dizzy, but I think nothing of it as I finally approach him.

"You okay?" Levi asks me, putting his hands on my cheeks. I place my hand ontop of his.
"I'm fine," I reply with a smile, "But I'm sorry I couldn't do better." My smile vanishes.

"Don't blame this all on yourself, ok? You did great I bet. I'm just glad you're safe now." He conveyed, as he looks at me directly in my eyes, his sparkling in the sun.

"You know, off topic, but since you can say we're official, I thought about you coming to stay with me at my place, all the time, together. You can say no of course, I just want to spend a lot of time with you. So, whaddya say?" He asks me, hoping for a yes but showing no expression at all.

"Would that even be allowed? I mean if it is, of course I'll come stay with you, ny time with you is precious." I mention, as I lay my hands on his chest, looking downward.

"Why wouldn't it be, but, just to be sure.. Commander, sir!" he yells out.

My cheeks flush out completely in bright pink from the embarrassment.

"Is she," He gestures to me, "Allowed to stay with me long time at my place, in the main building?"

"I see no problem with that at all." Commander Erwin says, brushing it off.

"You didn't have to say it so loudly, you know." I say, my cheeks getting even more flustered.

"I just want everyone to know you're mine, and mine only." He says with a grin, as he presses his lips firmly onto mine. I pull away slowly and say
"Well, should probably get packing!" Followed by a giggle.

"Let me come help" He says, grabbing my hand softly and walking back there with me.