Viciously in Love

Fifty seven.

I look at her and I don't know if I should be proud or worried. She's trying some of her clothes and she walks around from one side of the room, like she's in a fashion show, asking me every now and then what I thing about what she's wearing.

"So you're ok?" I ask again making her sigh.

She lays down in bed and looks at the ceiling. She's actually thinking about the answer... I don't think she knows. I think she's just trying to cope with everything that's happening right now.

"I think so..." she says taking me by surprise.

"Really? Nate said you cried almost the entire night." I say and she smiles.

"Almost. I thought about it. About Matthew, about me and him, about that fucking bet... Call me an idiot but am not that mad anymore..."

"You're an idiot." I say before she's done talking. "Kelly... He made a bet about you... That's how your relationship started..."

"But that's the thing..." she interrupts me. "We slept together months ago. Why would he stick around? Why would he keep telling me he loves me after that? Why would he do all those nice things for me?"

"He proved you he loved you..." I whisper to myself but she hears me.

"Exactly!" she gets up the bed and starts walking around the room again. "He had no reason to stay... but he did. I'm still mad at him for the whole bet thing... You're right. Our relationship was built on a fucking lie..." she sighs then turns around to look at me. "Did you talk to Jake?" I nod. "And?"

"He knew." I sigh. "He knew the entire time. Can you believe that?"

"And he never said anything about that?" she frowns.

"No. He kept it all to himself." I puff. "He said he felt like he wasn't supposed to say anything... that Matthew was supposed to deal with it..."

"He's not wrong." she mumbles and I frown.

"That's not an excuse, Kelly. Just because he wasn't involved in the bet, it doesn't mean he shouldn't have said anything about it. He should've stopped Matthew. He is his best friend, he was supposed to stop him from doing stupid things." I look at my hands and I start playing with them so I would calm down.

Kelly doesn't say anything. She sits down on her bed and stares at the wall.

"What are you going to do?" I ask her.

"I don't know." she raises her shoulders. "He made a bet about me... but he stayed... and now I'm confused." she lays back and stares at the ceiling again.

"I can't believe I'm about to say this..." I take a deep breath. "Last night, after you left... Matthew seemed disappointed and desperate..."

"What do you mean?" she gets up.

"He seemed disappointed on himself... for what he did to you. And he also seemed desperate because he was loosing you... He said he'll do anything to prove you he loves you..." I look at her and I can see a little smile. "But I'm not saying you should forgive him."

"Then what should I do?" she asks me sighing.

"Again, I can't believe I'm saying this but... talk to him." I say and she frowns. "You're not that mad, you love him and you know he loves you... If you'll talk to him and you'll see he's sorry then... I don't know, maybe you have your answer." I look at my hands again.

"You seem to have experience."

"You have no idea." I laugh bitterly.

"What are you going to do about Jake?" she asks.

"I don't know." I raise my shoulders. "He lied to me, he helped his friend hurt my friend... but I hurt him, last night." I look at her and she frowns. "I told him I never loved him and that I could never love someone like him." I say and her eyes pop out of shock.

"Why would you say that?" she frowns.

"I was mad? I still am, it's just.. on the spot, it felt like the only thing I could do to make him understand the gravity of what he did." I sigh. "I might be regretting it now."

"No shit." she puffs. "You said he's broken. You said he had a really hard time opening up to you and you did that to him?" she gets up the bed and walks around the room gesticulating.

"I don't understand why you're so ok with everything." I raise my voice.

"Neither do I!" she yells. "I love Matthew and I know he loves me. He did a horrible thing. I get that. I'm not an idiot, it's just... I don't know... I feel like it didn't actually happen, you know?" she says and I frown confused. "Nothing from what he ever did made me thing about something like that and... I think - and hope - that everything that happened between us was real... and it just started because of a lie. Is it really that crazy?" she asks me when she sees my face.

"Who am I to judge? I forgave Jake so many times because of the idiot things he has done, I lost count..." I laugh.

"Yeah... you're an idiot." she mocks me.

"I know. And I'm in love with an idiot." I sigh.

"What a coincidence, so am I." she laughs. "So we're going to talk to them?" she says it more like a question about what I will do.

"I think so."