You're So Golden |H.S|

Chapter 82

Sunflower in the evening
Standing in the garden
Taking up that space

No power can compel me
Back into the daylight
Let that evil wait

***

Harry's POV
January 28th

Jumping out of the car, I slam my door shut, and comb my fingers through my hair as I make my way to the front of the building, holding a bouquet in my hand which is wrapped and kept held together with a yellow ribbon.

Lately, I've been feeling like I haven't thanked Ariana enough for being so patient with me, so I thought about getting something nice for her.

She'll probably complain like she usually does when I give her small gifts out of the blue, because she doesn't like receiving them, but this is honestly a gift for me too.

Seeing her smile is enough to make me feel better and the minute she sees the colorful flowers and one tiny sunflower mixed in with the bunch, I'm having a feeling we'll both feel a bit better.

She gets flowers and I get a smile, it's a win-win.

I stand still for a moment, looking inside the glass window as I watch Ariana laugh with Rita, smiling just as big as she did when I dropped her off earlier, only this time it appears to be more genuine.

She's been under so much stress since the party, and I think she feels like she needs to somehow fix me so I feel better again, but really all I need is time.

I'm not sure how long it's gonna take for me to feel better and comfortable in my skin again, but I have a feeling it might take a while.

After I came home with my haircut and I saw the look on her face, I instantly felt guilty and assumed she was upset with me.

She wasn't though. She was nothing but supportive like she usually is, but I still have a feeling she was holding back what she was actually feeling.

It's been a few days since then and not much has changed.

She tried to paint my nails again the other night but when I told her I wasn't ready she made it clear she understood, but I have a feeling it still hurt her...and when she saw I was no longer wearing my jewelry, including the ring she got me for Christmas, that's when she finally spoke up to me about it.

I felt terrible and again thought she was getting angry and impatient with me, but she just asked if there was anything she could do to help me get comfortable again. And while I wish there was something that could help, I know this is something I need to do on my own.

We also talked about my mother some more, and talking usually helps so I felt a little better.

Before the party, I hadn't seen my mother in ages. I always kept my distance after I started becoming the person I always wanted to be. So when I finally felt like myself, I knew if I saw her again she would take that away from me.

Maybe it's my fault for being sensitive by letting her words affect me, but whenever she speaks to me the way she did, I feel like the same boy I was ten years ago all over again.