Clana- Got a Secret, Can You Keep It?

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Haven't done one of these guys in a while

Also, maybe a tiny bit of angst, but it's mostly a crack fic


Alana had been acting... off. And Connor had absolutely no idea why or how to deal with it.

That's why, as a last resort, he'd gone to Zoe for help.

His hand hovered over her door, willing himself to knock. It's fine, you're embarrassment about asking for help isn't as bad as how worried you are about Alana. Just do it, you prick.

Finally, Connors hand seemed to work, and he knocked on his sisters door. "Zoe? I need some advice. About Alana."

He heard some movement come from her bedroom, and, of Connors ears were working right, some hushed whispers. "Coming!"

Zoe opened her door and quickly shut it, not letting Connor see inside. "What's up? What's wrong with Alana?" Connor had jumped back at the fast motions his sister had made, but tried to play it cool.

"I uh, well..." Connor trailed off. "I'm worried I did something wrong? She's been acting... off. And, I just, I don't know. I don't know what I did, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah I got you." Zoe wiped off some lipstick from her mouth, and Connor realized she'd probably been making out with her 'boyfriend', Evan. "Okay, so, well... girls love chocolate. Get her chocolate. And I mean, you never know, maybe she's just PMSing. Just... be sweet to her."

She reached behind her for the door handle. "Anything else?"

"Nope. I'm good. Thanks, Zoe."

"Anytime." Zoe slammed and locked the door behind her, continuing her mini makeout session.

As Conor walked away, he could have sworn he headed two female voices... but then again, Evan did have a pretty feminine voice.

———

"Weird question."

"Shoot."

"Okay, so I know you're fake dating Zoe." Connor started.

"Right..." Evan trailed off, picking at his finger nails.

"And I'm fake dating Alana... Okay, actually this is two questions. First one, why are we doing this?"

"Um, internalized homophobia?" Evan mumbled. "I don't know."

"Okay, okay. Second question. Were you making out with Zoe today?"

"No?"

"Holy shit," Connor stood up, rushing to the door. "Alana is cheating on me."

"What? No!" Evan stopped Connor before he got to the door. "Dude! You're cheating on her with me! We're all cheating on each other! Do you not remember the plan?"

"Plan?" Connor asked. "What plan?"

"The, the plan!" Evan said, exasperated. "You, uh, you 'date' Alana, and I 'date' Zoe, but we're actually both gay couples together? Wait, did we not tell you about this? Oh. Oh god."

"You know..." Connor trailed off. "That makes a lot more sense.

"Yeah," Evan started. "It really be like that sometimes."

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