Niall Horan Imagines

Alone

His POV

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Sleep refused to welcome me through its gates. I tossed and turned in a restless state, staring at the ceiling, then the wall, then the window. If I could block out the pain, I would watch the doorway or her usual spot on the bed, hoping she would show up in either. 

She didn't. 

A steady rain began to fall outside, so I switched to my back to watch the lighting light up the ceiling. 

The pitter-patter on the window lulled me to sleep like her gentle whispers used to. 

I rolled onto my side, under a light sleeping spell. A haze settled over me; I was not asleep nor awake. A loud crackle of thunder sounded off nearby, and it jolted me fully awake. I reached out my hand to comfort her, knowing she would be frightened, but my hand fell to the cool, empty bed. 

I let out a moan, knowing I would never again feel her comfort at night, or feel her lips on mine. Her fingers would never again fit perfectly into mine, and her arms would never hold me to her. 

I would never have her heart again because she didn't want me to. 

She didn't want me. 

A heavy sigh mixed with the rain outside. The thunder only got closer, and I imagined her huddled against me under the covers. That image sent me out of bed, pulling on a shirt and pants, grabbing my keys and starting the car. 

I drove slowly through the rain, planning everything out inside my mind, hoping with everything that I had that I wouldn't fumble like the fool that I was. 

I stopped in front of her house, chewing on my lip nervously. 

She was probably asleep, I thought. It was already 2. 

I still convinced myself to walk up the steps to her flat and knock on the door. Thunder sounded ominously behind me as I stared at my wet shoes in the dark. 

I knocked once again, hopeful. The door slid open after a few moments. The rain seemed to silence so I could hear her. 

"Niall?" She called. I could hear the sadness in her voice as she stepped out of the shadows. Her eyes were wet with tears, and she shook with fear. She looked how she did the night it happened. 

"(Y/N)," I sighed. Her name flowing from my lips looked like it physically hurt her. 

"Listen, please," I pleaded. She wiped her eyes once and sighed. 

"What I did was horrible; you know it better than me. You know what being drunk does to me. In these few weeks we've been apart, the thought of alcohol sickened me." Her eyes met mine and they locked. "I feel like the worst person alive because what I did to you is nothing I ever want to do again," I breathed, trying to hold in my sobs. 

"But I need you. I need you like I never have before because you made me feel like me again; like a normal human being. You gave me an anchor that I lost in the depths of the sea a long time ago, and I love you," I choked out, surprised at the words that escaped my mouth. 

She sobbed loudly and pulled me to her, burying her face in my neck. I felt her body tremble against me, and knew this was all too much for her. 

"I'm sorry," I whispered against her. I pulled her inside, slipping off my shoes and letting our bodies fall onto the couch. She continued to cry silently against me, but I didn't mind. She was in my arms, and that was all that mattered. 

After what felt like an eternity, she looked up at me as I stroked her hair. 

"Niall," she sighed, pushing herself off of me. The thunder and rain only continued to grow in intensity. I nodded. 

"C'mon," she whispered, pulling me towards her room. I let a smile play on my lips as she pulled me under her covers and let me wrap her in my arms. 

"I'm sorry," she whispered against me. I looked down at her nuzzled against my chest. 

"You have nothing to be sorry for," I whispered softly back. Her fingertips traced patterns on my arm as the lightning lit up her face. 

"I love you," she said. We both looked at each other as I pushed my lips against hers. When she let go softly, I smiled. 

"Okay?" I asked. 

"Okay." 

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