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Jennie

"Good evening, and welcome." I lowered my voice to a quiet hum. "I'm so glad that you are all here tonight."

Guilt carried me here as much as road rage. A few sniffs of my lavender face towel basket and dimmed lights helped me settle into my space, shutting off the noises and distractions outside the closed door.

With the twenty resting bodies in this safe space. I tucked my feet under bent knees and rested my hands in my lap. "Take in a deep, ujjayi, three-part breath. Chest, lungs, then deep in your belly. Fill it with breath until it's so tight it might pop."

I palmed my chest, my eyes sweeping the room. "When stressed, our breath turns shallow and hollow. Hot, stale air traps in the bottom of our lungs. Release it, breathing as slowly as possible. Turn your attention away from the distractions outside. Focus on the feelings stirring inside, acknowledge them for a breath, and let them go..."

The next fifty-five minutes were a blissful journey away from my overthinking tendencies and refocusing on the present. The stress-inducing influences in my life and spirals out of my control dissolved under the more pressing physical and mental needs of my class members.

All twenty names, their physical restrictions, and mental challenges lived in my brain space. Each relaxed face projected a checklist of background demographics and injuries. Tyler, the newest, struggled with PTSD after losing two in his unit. An IED forced Dave, the oldest vet at 34, to retire before his service time ended. My first participant could teach the class himself. The rest fell in between and on their recovery trajectories.

I rotated through class routines but, despite the attendees' discrepancies, my end meditation approach never changed. "Chakra, meaning wheel, refers to different energy points in your body. Think of spinning centres of energy. Each corresponds to different locations on the body, bundles of nerves, organ systems, and how we're feeling."

Returning to my seated position, I smiled at the resting bodies. "Seven main chakras run along your spine from the crown of the head..." I palmed mine and pointed to my tailbone. "... to the sacrum. Keeping these energy centres open allows for a balanced mind, body, and spirit."

"Anja..." I pressed between my eyes. "Associated with images, dreams, imagination, and visions. A blocked Anja can cause headaches, lack of concentration, and hearing problems. Beyond that, slipping away from reality or losing touch with your intuition..."

My breath hitched.

"... and its demon is disillusion."

"Preparing for meditation, join me for three Oms." Drawing a deep breath, my throat, tongue, and palate warmed and vibrated with a low chant. I slacked my jaw, releasing the 'Aum' sound.

The more experienced mouths opened. Baritone hums vibrated the air space, raising the hairs on the back of my neck. Goosebumps followed, and heat pumped through my palms. Its instant impact was followed by smiles, then shoulders and jaws relaxed.

"Lay down. Close your eyes. Draw a deep breath." I took an exaggerated, and loud breath. "Imagine your breath spreading to all corners of your body. Exhale, with your tension melting."

"Imagine a clean, rich purple bleeding into the darkest blue. As you inhale, feel this colour, picturing it in your mind. Open your ability to think clearly. As you exhale, release the mental blockages. Sweep out the cobwebs. I have some facecloths to help. If you don't want one, then lay your hands on your belly and I'll walk past."

Tiptoeing, I draped folded cloths over one forehead after another. "They're washed in Tide and infused with lavender, Anja's essential oil. Trust your ability to recognise what's right, what's true. Feel your mind becoming clearer, distractions settling down and disappearing. Thoughts will come, that's okay. Acknowledge them for a breath, then let them go. Take the next few minutes. Breathe. Relax. Try to find a sense of silence."

The room fell silent as a tome, so I turned up the music volume. Tyler's flinching temples gave me a note to talk to him afterward. My mind drifted to its usual dark places. With two minutes left, I pulled out my notebook and read off my sixth chakra affirmations. "Focus on my voice. Let these words soak in. Repeat them within your mind, if you'd like."

"I manifest my visions."

"I seek wisdom and guidance in all situations."

"I listen to my inner guidance."

"I see clearly."

Hopefully, I offered a safe, and open place for more than exercise - exploration, mental focus, and neural restructuring. As class participants struggled to press their military boots into civilian shoes, hopefully, they found an applicable coping mechanism and a post-deployment brotherhood.

Peace filled every pair of eyes, my measure of success. Warmth glowed in my chest, mirroring the LED candles circling me, and the usual knots pinching my shoulders were slack. I bowed my head, resting my lashes against my cheeks. "In peace and loving kindness, Jai Bhagwan. Namaste." (Loosely translated: May the divine in you be victorious. I bow to you.)

Deep 'Namastes' returned the sentiments. The vibe was sombre but warm and relaxed. My spirit was lighter, my brain quieter, and my body tired. Success. A shiver ran down my back as mats were sprayed and gathered.

"Great class." Phil, a tall, muscular honourable discharge, offered me a grateful smile that warmed my heart. Bending over, he dropped his towel into the dirty laundry bag. "Thank you, Jennie."

I smiled. "Glad to see you watching that shoulder."

"Forgot I was wearing this." His hand palmed his prosthetic attachment's bicep as he paid me the highest compliment. "Thank you."

A quiet man with cropped hair, bulging shoulders, and his chin dipped down approached me. "Jennie? Can I ask you something?"

"Of course, Tyler." I stepped over, hugging my elbows with my palms. "What's up?"

"I, uhh..." His eyes studied my feet. "Do you do one-on-one help? During meditation, my brain... it's..."

"Not quiet enough?"

He whooshed out an exhale, deflating. "Yeah."

I widened my smile into one I hoped was encouraging. "Absolutely. I'm here tomorrow. Does 11:15am work?"

"Yeah." The tightness in his voice relaxed. "Thanks, I appreciate it."

"Of course."

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