Too much love will kill you

Panic Attack

Rachel's POV:

I was sitting in the drama room one lunchtime and I was trying to get some work done for my upcoming mock exams. They were in just over two weeks and it was massively stressing me out. I couldn't revise at home because I never got any peace, if I shut myself in my bedroom then Sadie or Skye would scrabble at my door until I let them in or some other hugely annoying thing would happen and I'd give up in frustration. The door opened and Mia and Jake walked in, they'd been for their 20 week scan today and of course everyone wanted to see the scan photos. The noise was unbearable, I slammed down my revision in frustration "Can you all be quiet!" I yelled "Some of us have exam's to work for!"

Everyone looked at me in surprise. Louis placed a hand on my shoulder "Hey it's alright Rach. Just take a deep breath and relax a bit, you're going to be just fine okay"

My eyes filled with tears and I choked down a sob "It's not okay! I can't concentrate because of the obscene amount of noise you're all making. It's bad enough that nothing will stick in my head" I shouted.

I tried to take a deep breath in like Louis suggested but it seemed to get stuck in my throat. I then realised that my hands were shaking and I clenched them into fists to try to combat it. I stood up shakily and took a few steps around the room, Louis looked at me concerned. Suddenly the room lurched and tilted and I grabbed out at the wall to steady myself. Louis grabbed a hold of me and led me to a chair, "Baby talk to me. What's wrong" He pushed me into a chair but I couldn't sit still.

"I just went dizzy" I mumbled pushing him away roughly

My breathing got faster and more ragged. My hands were trembling worse than ever, and my thoughts were racing. Fran walked in and she immediately looked at me in concern "Rachel are you okay?"

"N.. No.." I stuttered

Suddenly it clicked in her head and she came over to me "Hey it's okay. Listen to me you're having a panic attack Rachel, I know it's scary but it's important that you try and slow your breathing down for me. In for 3 and out for 5" She demonstrated what she wanted me to do. I was too lost in my anxiety to focus on anything and I took a shaky step backwards.

There were black spots at the edge of my vision and they were slowly getting closer. Suddenly my legs appeared to give out from underneath me and I heard Fran shout at Louis to catch me. He caught me and lowered me to the floor, everyone's faces were whirling around my vision and eventually the black spots took over my vision and I blacked out on the drama room floor.

When I woke up, my head was resting in Louis' lap and Fran was holding my hand. Slowly I blinked and my vision cleared, my drama teacher walked through the door with the school nurse and Fran helped me to sit up and I leant against Louis torso. The school nurse asked me some questions about what happened before I fainted.

"She had a panic attack" Fran told her "She was hyperventilating and then she fainted."

Louis gently lifted me back into my wheelchair and Fran wheeled me over to the nurses office and waited with me till the end of lunch.

"I'll see you later, Rach. I hope you're alright" She said and then left for afternoon lessons

The nurse called Mam to come and collect me and thankfully she wasn't working so she came and picked me up. When we got home, she made us both Hot Chocolate and she sat next to me and cuddled me gently.

*What happened sweetheart. The nurse said you had a panic attack, what do you think caused that?" She asked gently

It was all too much for me and I burst into tears. Mam pulled me onto her lap and rocked me gently, she stroked my hair and I cried into her chest until I was all cried out.