Black day pt 2

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"I can try"
Was what Jin said to namjoon. After the breakdown he was tired and sad and suddenly felt empty. He just wanted to do what he was doing for the past 1 year. Which was so wrong he knew but he can not resist doing it anymore. He was just staring at the white empty wall. He felt that tnr wall was him, nothing special and uselessly cracked up. And now that the members know he is anthore burden to them. As the members decided to give him his space for a while by going to wash their tear stained faces and clothes as well.

As if on auto pilot jin walked to his room, took a right and entered the small bathroom which he shared with his roommate. He locked the door, opened the mirror and took out the metal piece from the box. Stared at it for a moment. Took it near to his skin, but as he was about to go deeper a knock pulled his attention. "Hyung! Open the door! Please! Open the door." It was yoongi desperately trying to unlock the door. Jin sighed and kept the metal piece in the box and hid it in the flush tank of the toilet. He opened the door and yoongi hoarded in. "Hyung aremyou ok?" He said running his hand around the older trying to make sure he was ok. "I am fine yoongi-ah" he saidin low voice. "You will never lock the door ever, you get it? Never lock the door." Yoongi said hugging the taller and broader man. Jin held the smaller close. Yoongi took him to the bed and laid him down made sure that he was asleep. Then he went to the bathroom and searched everywhere trying to find any sharp object which could
Be possibly harmful. Scissors, shaving blade, disinfecting bathroom cleaners, harmful soaps he took everything out.

He then searched the roommates bedside table and took out all sharp object. He hide them away. He met namjoon in the living room who was searching something. "What are you doing?" He asked. "We are trying to find everything which might be harmful or dangerous for him. Till now we found Scissors, blades and some medications which might be potentially dangerous" namjoon said. After making the dorm safe enough all 6 of them decided that no matter what happens at least one of them must be with him. Soon enough they were hungry and hoseok decided to make something.

Jin came in with ruffled hair and pale skin. "You are awake!" Hoseok said with cheery voice. Jin just smiled. He sat on the bar chair kept near the kitchen counter head in his hand. He sighed out loud, "are you ok?" Hoseok asked coming near the older. "Am good hobi" he said in a small voice. Hobi smiled and sat beside him rubbing his back down. "I can understand how you feel. But we hope that together we can make you feel better." Jin chuckled a bit and said "thankyou." "Would you like to eat? I made noodles!" Hobi said smiling. Jin nodded his head in agreement. Hobi got him a plate of noodles. They both ate together in silence. Jin soon got up and wore his coat. "Where are you going hyung?" Taehyung asked. "Umm to super market to buy groceries?" He said. "I will come with you too!" He said smiling.

They were in super market taehyung was busy looking for bananna milk for jungkook when jin slipped pass his attention and ended up in sanitary section. He knew there on the top corner shelf there were safety razors kept. Jin was about to reach the boxes when someone held his hand. He turned his head, it was taehyung smiling. "Hyung what are you doing here? We do not need anything from here. We need to buy ingredients for tomorrow's breakfast! Its been such a long time since you made vegetable stew with fish for breakfast! Why not make it tomorrow?"  Jin just nodded too shocked to say anything. Taehyung led him to the vegetables section. Jin tried  to look for which vegetable he should put in the stew..... he looked for more ingredients to put in the stew they return home after buying stuff.

The boys ordered pizza they all ate the pizza while watching a movie. It was jin's favorite movie. He remembered when  he went to see the movie with members. It was the first movie they watched together as a group. That was a precious time for him. And he has always treasured it. But then wouldn't it be just as special memory even without him? Wouldn't they be happy together as a group without him? After all he was just 2 days old as a member of the group, and it wouldn't have mattered even if he wouldn't have been there. Funny isn't it? You treasure something so precious which you think is precious because of you but turns out it would be just as precious even without you. Leaving you with no worth. Or to say the truth worthless. His wide smile narrowed to a smile which was plastered on his face for the past 1 year. A fake and worthless smile. Which was just meant for the people, to let them know he was fine. Just fine. That is what he thought the first few weeks after their concert an year ago when he started to feel this way. It will pass away and he was just fine. But turned out he wasn't.

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