Persphyni: I am Determined

31

Persphyni,

This is my fourth letter to you. I know you aren't getting them and there's a chance you never will. But you need to know that I do love you.

I think about you everyday. You're the only thing that keeps me sane here in the dark. Everyday I fight to live in the hopes that you made it up to space. You're my daughter, I have to be positive, right?

And I want to reiterate. I'm not mad. I could never be. You getting out of this bunker was possibly one of the best things you could have done. I just wish I had been brave enough to follow you.

Octavia has lost it. That spark. Just like you told me. I tried so hard to prevent it. But you can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved. That's one thing I've learned through the years. Especially down here. I've told you about the shortage and the pit. But now she listens to no one. I can feel her darkness radiate through this locked prison.

No one can help her. No one can get close enough to try. She won't let them. She's spiraled. I pray that you are alive and well and that we can make it back to each other so you can help her. You're the only one who can reach her.

But, I fear that even if someone makes it down to let us out, we won't be here to get out. If that happens. Know that my last thought was of you.

With love.
Kane

_______•*•*•*•_______

I stand in the small grove of trees. The small cluster surrounded by a circular stream of water that splits and reconnects at the end. Fully separating this grove from the land around it. This little grove is where I planned on making a memory farm. Each tree here will have a carving. A name and a message. So that one day, maybe, someone may come along and find it. So that those who are no longer here are not forgotten.

I find myself guilty of that. I find myself slipping and forgetting the longer I live. And I have only been alive for 23 years. Yet it feels like a lifetime as the memories begin to fade. I still feel the blood, I still see the wounds I had inflicted, but their names and their faces are erased.

I can't let that happen. For those I've killed, for those I witnessed die, for all that have gone to Death's side of the bridge, I will not let the remaining slip again.

And so I carved. The ones I knew personally I wrote a message. Those I did not know personally, I wrote for their safe passage. Even if their passage was already made.

I wrote first for the one who wrote me.

Jasper Jordan
Goggles
For the brave protector of the 100
For the wild child of the bunch
For a friend, for a brother
May we meet again.

"With so much left to do,
You'll be missing out, and we'll be missing you."

I spent all day in the heat. But it felt like no time had gone by when I carved the final name for today.

Lincoln
Seda
Biga bro
Ai hod yu in
For the hero I wish I could have saved.
For the hero I wish I could have been.
For the protector of peace. For the fighter of his kin.
For Lincoln kom Trikru
May we meet again.