Super sorry for the short chapter yesterday, I'm afraid this one is also going to be short but everyone's been asking for an update. It's not gonna give much information about what happened in the previous chapter but I promise you're going to find out more about the "brunette". Who do you guys think it might be? thanks for reading!!
Hours later, the brunette is lay across my chest with her eyes closed. I've already calmed from the angry sex, but she looks like she's completely shattered.
What have I done?
I move myself carefully from beneath her and climb out of the bed naked. She doesn't stir at all and I begin to miss the way JJ could just sense when I was no longer around her.
I quietly rummage through my belongings for a set of clothes for the day. I find my white tshirt, my black skinny jeans and I continue to search another five minutes for my navy blue cardigan... it's not there.
I remember that I purposely left it in the wardrobe at JJ's apartment knowing how much she loved it. Picturing her wearing it brings a wide smile to my face, but it quickly dissolves when I remember the woman in the bed.
On the dresser is a few pieces of paper and I manage to find a pen on the opposite side of the room.
• Sorry I left without saying bye. I just have a few things I need to sort out. I may see you soon, Spencer •
I shove the messily written note on top of her jeans, zip up my bag and leave.
I reach a coffee shop closer to the city and head inside for a drink. I could do with one after the amount of alcoholic drinks I had last night and the hideous sex this morning.
I cringe at the thought of the naked woman beneath me as I moved in and out of her. She's a nice girl and she's good looking, she's just not JJ.
That's the only thing that kept me going, the only way I managed to finish... picturing JJ's face as hers.
I check my watch, it's just turning four pm and I'm already bored. Back home, I could lay with JJ for hours... I used to be able to watch her sleep and play with her long hair, but I couldn't stay more than twenty minutes after sex with the other woman.
She's probably awake again now, reading the message I left her and wondering what she did wrong. I don't know how I used to do this as a normal thing. Go into the city regularly and just sleep with any woman that didn't look like she was disease ridden.
***
The hands on my watch finally tick to 7 pm and the barista informs me they're closing.
Outside the wind has picked up and I button up my black cardigan all the way in some kind of hope it will protect me from the cool breeze.
After a five minute debate I decide to get pissed again, why not?
The first club I enter is packed with drunken men and slutty women many of which groping one and other. I head straight to the bar and down three drinks in ten minutes. I've drunk another four before I'm approached by a scruffy looking man.
"Hey, you." he beckons me toward him and the alcohol prevents me from thinking rationally, causing me to follow the man.
"Want anything?" he asks nodding toward his hand buried in his pocket. I nod no and he attempts to persuade me into some cocaine. Again I refuse and he frowns.
"Don't look at me like that." I laugh and an image of JJ's face comes into my head.
* She's pouting, trying her hardest not to smile cause I took the last slice of pizza.
"You're nasty." She whines, attempting to bite the food in my hands before pulling back and frowning.
"Don't look at me like that." I smile and she pushes her bottom up out further. "Fine." I give in an hand the pizza to her. "Because I love you." I continue and I'm rewarded with her smile. *
"C'mon I'll offer you a deal?" he pushes further.
"Do you have any Dilaudid?" I ask, not being able to push the image of JJ from my head and he smirks.
"So you're that kind of guy?" he laughs and rummages through his pocket.
"Shut the fuck up and give it to me."
"Alright stress head, here" we exchange the money and drugs before he heads off in search of his next customer.
I know I'm being completely stupid taking this shit again, but since Toby injected me a few weeks ago, I've lost the ability to say no to taking it. Now with everything going on between JJ and I, I have no reason not to.
I head into the bathroom and fill my blood stream with the addictive narcotic.
JJ's POV:
Derek and Emily leave some time after I stopped crying and now I'm left alone in an empty apartment.
Boredom kicks in straight away and I find myself missing Marcus. Whenever I got bored in the old apartment he was always there to keep me company. Now I'm stuck with a snobby older woman that looks down her nose at me constantly.
I start work again tomorrow. I've been of recently because of everything with my father and Mr Anderson was ok with that, he just expects me back tomorrow.
I wonder if Spencer will be there? Will I be able to face him?
He might already be over me, heck he probably never was in love with me but I know that I was madly in love with him. I need Him.
I flick on the television and after a few minutes of watching a movie, there's a knock at my door.
"Jayj?" Tracy's voice calls through the wood and her alarmed tone causes me to jump to my feet.