Type: Angst
Ship: BloodLust (Lust x Horror)
First Person (Lust's POV)
Not requested, just wanted to write something. Also, I'm sorry I never write fluff I just don't know what happiness feels like apparently-
(Medium length)
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It was almost midnight. The night we were going to find out how long we had left. I was sitting on the couch, cuddling with Horror, and the rest of the gang was there with and Dream, Ink, Blue and Geno. I didn't quite understand how relaxed everyone seemed, the countdown was going to start in a mere 3 minutes... maybe they were trying to enjoy their last moments of obliviousness. It suddenly made everything worse, knowing when you were going to die. I wasn't too worried about how long I had, though... now that Horror and I were together my depression and PTSD had started getting better. I wasn't paying attention to the current conversation topic, all I heard was something about 11:59. Wait, 11:59? I look up at the clock, accidentally giving myself whiplash. It was 11:59. Oh god, it's happening... I clenched my fists and stared up at the clock, waiting anxiously. Tick... tick... tick... 12:00. Everyone immediately looked down at the palm of their dominant hand, where the number of days left was supposed to appear. Taking a shaky breath and holding up my left hand, I did the same.
10
...
What?... only ten days?!
I could feel my soul pounding. That's impossible, this has to be wrong, it just... just can't be right! I glanced up at everyone else in the room. Everyone was smiling at each other, laughing. Even Geno. They all got large numbers. I looked up at Horror, trying to suppress the fear in my voice.
"W.. What'd you get..?" I ask him. He smiles at me.
"21,435" His smile fades slightly. "Why, what's your's?" I stared at him for a second.
"U-um, no reason, I... yeah, me too.. well, not exactly that but... yeah..." I look away and pull up my knees to my chest. Ten days.
I hear Dream mention his number, 22,713, and laugh. Nightmare fell silent. His was 18,436. I couldn't pay attention to anything else, even though I tried too. My mind was too fuzzy. Everyone else had so many years left. I had a little over a week. I almost passed out on the spot. Pulling myself up off the couch, I left the room and stumbled up the stairs. I heard someone call after me, but I didn't listen. Dragging myself to the end of the hall, I collapsed into Horror and I's bed. Pulling the blanket over my skull, I hugged my knees, laying on my side, and cried.
-
10
I wake up some time around 10:30, still feeling exhausted. I slept awkwardly, and my spine hurts like hell. I remember my number. I look down at my palm, hoping it was a bad dream. 10. I almost tear up just looking at it. What do I do with 10 days? What about all the things I wanted to do with my life? I wanted a family... I wanted to see so many things... How on earth am I going to die?
Snapping out of my thoughts, I hear Horror scream along with a loud crash from downstairs and I sit up. With a sigh, I pull on the longest sweater I could find and head downstairs. I don't want anyone to know how little time I have left. I find Horror in the kitchen, a large cookie tray on the ground.
"I dropped it by accident--" he says. "That was really fucking loud, I just wanted to make some cookies--"
I smile slightly. "Here, let me help you." I say, leaning down to pick up the tray.
"Nah! I got it, I promise I won't burn the house down this time, Lusty." He tells me. I'm unsure how to respond. I might not get a chance to bake with him ever again, but he thinks I have time... I sigh.
"Alright, Rory. I... I'm going to go lay on the couch." I say quietly, walking away.
-
9
I walk up to Dream and Ink, who'd been talking and laughing. "Hi guys!" I say, trying to sound enthusiastic. They smile at me.
"Hi, Lust. How are you?" Dream asks me. I try to smile back.
"I've been better.. anyways, I was wondering if you guys wanted to go, uh, I don't know-- do something? Today?"
"Oh, I'm sorry," Ink says. "We're pretty busy this week... How about two weeks from now? Sorry, our schedule is kinda full..." I can feel my heart sink, but I nod.
"Uh.. yeah, two weeks... sure.. sounds good, guys. I.. I'll see you then."
I take a shaky breath and walk away, knowing that I'd never get to follow through with that plan.
-
7
Walking over too the couch, I sit down next to Killer. One week left. He and Cross are watching TV.
"What's this show about?" I ask. "It looks interesting."
"Eh, it's nothing. I don't think you'd like it very much." Cross says, eating a chocolate bar. I nod silently.
"Oh. Alright... I'll go ahead and leave, then. Enjoy the show, guys." I say quieter then I meant to, and stand up to leave the room.
"Okay, bye Lust!" Killer calls after me.
Goodbye, Killer.
-
5
I'm sitting on the bed, hugging my knees to my chest and staring at the wall. Why is time going by so quickly... I'm already halfway there... I don't want to die... I feel the tears coming but force them back. The others shouldn't have to bear the burden with me. Suddenly, someone opens the door.
"Hey, Lust!" Dust says, standing in the doorway. "Nightmare, Blue and I were going to play some Uno. Wanna come?"
I shake my head. "No thanks, Dust." I'm too unstable for social interaction right now. They might find out how little time I have left. "You guys have fun, though."
He nods and closes the door. I pull the blanket around my shoulders and let the tears flow. Before even five minutes have passed, I'm sobbing my eye sockets out. They don't deserve to see me like this. I don't want to die. Not now, not tomorrow, not in a year. I don't even have a week, though. I have less than a week and I can't do anything about it. I should get my goodbyes in while I can, even if they can't know about it.
-
3
"Hey there, slut." Someone pushes me to the ground. My soul pounds. People are laughing. A sharp pain stabs through my pelvis, along with a horrible burning sensation that only gets worse. I'm screaming. It hurts so damn much. All I hear is more laughter and insults. "Slut." "Whore." I snap back to reality. I'm hyperventilating. I feel the wetness of tears on my face. It was just a flashback. I'm safe here, I'm safe here... I shiver, just the memory of that awful, burning pain makes me start hurting like hell. Regaining my senses, I realize that Geno is in the room, looking at me with a concerned expression. He gets up, walks over, and sits down next to me.
"PTSD?" He asks. I nod. He sighs. "I know the feeling. It's okay, Lust, your safe here. Nobody would hurt you here. It's all in the past now, it's okay."
I lean over and hug him as tightly as I possibly can. He hugs me back, not seeming bothered by the restraint on his torso. Before I know it, I'm sobbing, and he strokes my skull reassuringly. God, I'm so lucky he's my friend. Hell, he even acts like he's my dad, which didn't bother me in the slightest.
I hope he gets to live for a long, long time. I hope everyone will be happy.
-
1
My last day. I'm going to die at some point today, and I don't know when. I get up to find Horror.
"Rory?" I call out. He responds from a few rooms away. I run over to him and fall into a tight embrace. He hugs me back.
"Is something wrong, Lusty?" He asks, sounding concerned. I shake my head. I just need to hold him. Just this one last time. I tear up but wipe it away.
"Nothing's wrong. I love you so much, you don't even know... so, so much..." I can't help it anymore. I'm crying, and crying hard. "Can you.. please tell the.. the others that they've been the best friends.. I could ever have.."
Horror makes me look up at him. "Lust, what's going on, why are you talking like that? You sound like your gonna-" he stops. I can see panic in his eyes as he lets go of the hug and grabs my hand. One. He chokes on air. "I.."
I rip my hand out of his grasp and run away, sobbing. I hear him scream after me, telling me to stop, but I don't listen. I burst through the door and sprint outside. I don't want him to see me like this, but I know he's chasing me. He screams something about "looking out" and I almost slow down, confused. I hear tires screech, and I run into the road without someone to hold me back.
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Word count: 1571
Ahhhhhhh the angggsstttt I apparently can't write anything but angst to I severely apologize for the amount of dark strange things I'm putting out reeeeeeeeee