ANDRE J.
"You're here dumb early", I groan as Camille, Chastity, Tremaine, and Daviontae walk through the door.
"It's my niece's birthday, of course I'm here early", Chastity said as if it was the most clear thing on earth.
"Nigga, the party don't start for a few more hours", I said, and she waves me off.
Camille looked tired, and she was leaning on Tremaine while he looked around the house. I'm glad I went to school for interior design, because I can't live in an ugly house.
"Damn, bro, this place nice. What you do for a livin'?", Daviontae asked, and I thanked him.
"I went to school for construction. I liked building places, and I have my own little business for it. Nia, my wife, is an event planner", I explain, and I heard Camille chuckle.
"Nigga, you know what I'm about to ask. Where the food?", she asked, going straight for the kitchen.
"Not here. I gotta go shopping for some", I tell her, and she comes back and punches me in my arm hard as hell.
"Damn", everyone mumbled, and I almost punched her ass back, but I remembered she was pregnant.
Then again, I told her I was gonna kill her if she ever go pregnant. But, Tremaine my homie, not gonna lie. Shit, fuck it.
I cracked my knuckles and punched Camille in her thigh, and she screamed like I stabbed her.
"Calm the fuck down. I ain't kill you", I chuckle, and I felt someone slap the back of my head.
"How many times have I told you to not hit her? Damn, niggas don't listen", Nia sighed, hugging Camille.
I rub the back of my head and them nigga gonna laugh. This shit hurt, and Nia know she can't hit me because she got them Shaquille O'Neal hands and shit.
"Ole man hands. Can't be hittin' on me, you nigga", I tell Nia, and she hits me in my chest.
"Or what? And call me a nigga again", she said, and she goes and hugs Chas.
I see Willow come from down stairs, playing with the rips on her jeans. She went straight for Chastity and of course, Chastity picked her up and kissed her cheek.
"Hi, baby. Happy sixth birthday", Chastity squealed, and Willow smiled.
"Thank you, thank you. I feel famous", Willow gushed, and I shake my head.
"Niggas post you on Instagram and people wish you happy birthday and you don't know how to act", I mumble, and she glared at me.
"Leave my niece alone, you deformed Dorito", Chastity said, and I smile.
"Okay, you retarded blob fish", I reply.
"Old pop can built nigga", she said.
"Okay, you crusty big toe", I continued.
"Old AC head ass", she said, and Camille clapped her hands.
"Y'all both look like Pringle cans, now let's go food shopping", she says, and walks away before me or Chastity get to way anything.
"Raisin face ass", I mumble before going upstairs to get dressed.
I toss on a pair of black sweatpants and a burgundy Hennything is Possible hoodie that Nia got me from Fashion Nova. I take the grey durag off and put on the velvet burgundy one. I put on my black Air Max 97's and put my silver chain on.
"Hurry up, nigga. I'm trying to get off of my feet!", I heard Camille yell, and I roll my eyes.
"Shutcho ass up!", I yell back, and I rub deodorant on my armpits before going down stairs.
"Finally, hoe. What was you doing, putting baby powder on ya nuts?", Chastity asked with a smile on her face.
"Haha, funny nigga. Come on, we got a long day ahead", I say to them, and Chastity digs into Camille's purse and takes out her G Wagon keys.
"Okay, here's the plan. Nia, Camille, and Tremaine stay here and finish decorating. Me, Dre, Tae, and Willow will go and grab food and her cake. Also some helium, because I'm blowing up those ballons", Chastity listed, and no one had any complaints.
"I'm down. Go team Tinkerbell!", Willow cheered, and all the girls cheered while the niggas cringed at the team name.
"Daddy, you ain't cheering", Willow said, putting her hands on her hips and giving me the same fuckin' glare Nia does.
That shit gives me nightmares. Last time I saw that shit, I fucked up and accidentally called Nia a bitch while we was playing Fortnite together. I almost died, I think to myself as I have a staring contest with my daughter.
"Go team... Tinkerbell", I cheered, and she sighed but left me alone, thankfully.
"Alright, you guys go ahead. I swear, if you crash my car, if the accident don't kill you, I will", Camille warned, then she winked at Willow.
Those two have some type of unspoken arrangement goin' on, and it lowkey scare me. We all get into the truck and drive to the nearest Walmart, and Chastity had the bright idea to let Willow control the music. Don't get me wrong, my daughter is really nice and all that other shit, but she got music taste like her aunty...
And the first song that came on was some Nicki Minaj song.
"On the real, nigga
I'm a real nigga
I run around with them real niggas
Got real sons, I need a real sitta'", was the first thing I heard come through the speakers, and my daughter rapped it perfectly.
At least she had enough sense to not cuss in front of me, cause that'll get her lil' ass popped in the mouth.
"Chastity, why does my daughter know the words to this song?", I ask her, and she shrugs as if she don't know anything.
I noticed her hand was holding Tae's, and I flick him in the back of his head.
"No boo lovin'", I said, and he groaned while Chastity rolled her eyes.
"I hate being the youngest", she whined, and Willow shook her head and scrolled through Chastity's playlist, switching from Nicki to Youngboy, then she went to Megan then DaBaby.
Yep, she definitely get some of her music taste from me.