Joy: WE'RE BACK BITCHES!
Nightflyer: Midterms are officially over, so we're back in business.
Air: And I'm dead, as usual.
Rainkeeper: I think you're confusing yourself with Carnelian again.
Air: Nope, Nope, DEAD.
Nightflyer: Air-
Air: DEAAAAAAADDDDD. DEAD.
Kelp: *sighs* Just recite the speech like you know you want to.
Air: I cANT *starts crying* NIGHTFLYER YOU DO IT.
Nightflyer: *sighs and unfolds piece of paper*
Nightflyer: I give you, probably the closest words to canon Destiel we're ever gonna get.
Air: *sobs harder*
Nightflyer: *recites Dean's lines from the last episode*
Nightflyer: "Cas, I hope you can hear me, and wherever you are, it's not too late.... I should've stopped you."
Air: *squeak of pain*
Nightflyer:" You're my best friend-"
Air: *falls down and curls up in a ball, cry of agony*
Nightflyer: "But I just let you go- because it was easier than admitting I was wrong. I don't know why I get so angry. I just know that it's always been there, and when things go bad it just- it just comes out and I can't stop it."
Air: *screams and cries*
Nightflyer: "No matter how bad I want to- I just can't stop it. And I forgive you, of course I forgive you. I'm sorry it took me so long- I'm sorry it took me til now to say it. Cas, I'm so sorry. Man I hope you can hear me- I hope you can hear me."
Air: *cries*
Joy: Ummmmmm okaaayyyyyy?
Air: I'm gonna watch it every day for the rest of my life and when I die, I'm gonna project it on my tombstone. *wipes tears*
Nightflyer: *pats her on the head*
Air: I'm better now.
Nightflyer: Are you?
Air: *curls up in a ball again*
Air: No.
*players appear*
Rainkeeper: AND THAT CONCLUDES TODAY'S SUPERNATURAL ANGST TRAIN, ALL ABOARD THE S.S. FUN DARE, THANK YOU AND GOOD DAY!
Nightflyer: All aboard the Destiel train, leaving ship station.
Air: *in a depressed voice* Choo CHOO
Rainkeeper: *facetalons*
Rainkeeper: What are we gonna do with you two?
Peril: What are we gonna do with ANY of you really? Seeing as you are our children.
Tsunami: Maybe my mother had a point in wanted Seashell and Kelp killed....
Moon: That sounds like a you problem.
Deathbringer: And the fact that one of your boyfriends is now a girlfriend sounds like a YOU problem.
Winter: WE'RE NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT IT, OKAY?
Deathbringer: Oh yes we are.
Glory: *rolls up a newspaper and swats Deathbringer on the snout*
Glory: Bad Deathy!
Deathbringer:......I'm both hurt and offended.
Glory:........*swats him again*
Deathbringer: OW!
Carnelian: What's on the gaygenda?
Joy: Did you just say gay-genda?
Carnelian: Yes.
Air: I thought that was Amber's word.
Amber: It was until we realize that AS A GIRL I'M STRAIGHT AND I CAN'T BE A FABULOUS GAY BOY NOW.
Rainkeeper: Do you want to go back to being Umber then?
Amber: OH hell no, it just means that Carnelian has to step up to the gay joke plate.
Carnelian: How many times do I have to tell you, I'M NOT GAY!
Amber: Suuuuuuurreeeeee
Sunny: HA! Yeah right.
Kinkajou: We all know Carnelian.
Glory: Aren't you still married to Queen Ruby?
Carnelian: WHAT DOES RUBY HAVE TO DO WITH ANY OF THIS?
Glory: Well one would assume that if you didn't like her, you'd divorce her.
Kelp: Yeah, that's not really how truth or dare marriages work.
Moon: I've forgotten who I married and who I divorced, so I just assume I'm married to the whole Jade Winglet at this point. Honestly, it's just easier.
Joy: I feel like we had a dare about that..... Seashell?
Seashell: Hang on.
Seashell: *dives into Olympic sized swimming pool full of the dare papers*
Rainkeeper: She'll be gone for awhile.
Air: And while we wait, WE NEED TO ADDRESS A VERY SERIOUS ISSUE.
Peril: That Clay is the sole purpose for cows being put on the endangered species list?
Clay: Hey, I HEARD THEY WERE BAD FOR THE ENVIRONMENT, SO REALLY I'M DOING Y'ALL A FAVOR.
Glory: YOU'RE THROWING OFF THE FOOD CHAIN!
Amber: THE MUD KINGDOM NO LONGER HAS A STABLE FOOD SUPPLY!
Clay: But like.....COWS.
Nightflyer: As urgent as that matter seems, this is more important.
Starflight: Your dare is more important than the balance of nature in Pyrrhia?
Nightflyer: Yes.
Air: DOES EVERYONE KNOW HOW TO DO THE FLOP?
All:.........
Riptide: YES.
Kinkajou: *raises hand* NO.
Glory: What the hell is the- you know what, I don't even want to know.
Rainkeeper: *pulls up YouTube video and hits play*
Riptide: *quietly singing along*
Players:........
Sunny: I love it.
Fatespeaker: So let me guess, we're doing the flop?
Nightflyer: What? No.
Hosts: *laugh*
Rainkeeper: You're gonna sing Earth by lil Dicky.
Moon: What's that?
Joy: Exactly the type of song you'd expect from someone named Lil Dicky.
Seashell: But we need more singers, sooooooo
Air: CLAY PICK SOMEBODY YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT IN THIS ROOM.
Clay: Ah! Um, um- Dune?
Tsunami: WHY WOULD YOU SAY DUNE?
Clay: I DON'T KNOW I PANICKED.
Kelp: Peril pick somebody.
Peril: Thorn.
Sunny: YES.
Nightflyer: Everybody pick one til we say stop.
Tsunami: Anemone.
Riptide: Tamarin.
Tsunami: Wh-
Riptide: I have ships, you know.
Glory: Ruby.
Carnelian: I hate you.
Glory: Noted.
Deathbringer: Hmmmm- Swordtail.
Joy: Ah, some Pantala guys. It's about time.
Starflight: Cricket.
Fatespeaker: Flame.
Amber: *gasps*
Sunny: Meerkat.
Air: YES
Kinkajou: Coconut!
Glory: Why would you pick him?
Kinkajou: Well, knowing the game's track record, I expect he's going to be killed, sooooo
Turtle: Let's go with....Stonemover.
Amber: Sundew!!!!
Carnelian: And Willow. Willow's cute.
Amber: NO BREAKING UP MY SHIP.
Carnelian: Wouldn't dream of it.
Moon: Darkstalker!
All: WHY!?!?!?
Moon: BECAUSE HE NEEDS LOVE!
All: NO HE DOESN'T.
Deathbringer: Now what?
Joy: Pick a celebrity out of this list.
Justin Beiber
Lil Dicky
Ariana Grande
Halsey
Zac Brown
Brendon Urie
Wiz Khalifa
Haliee Steinfeld
Snoop Dogg
Kevin Hart
Adam Levine
Shawn Mendes
Charlie Puth
Sia
Lil Jon
Miley Cyrus
Katy Perry
Miguel
Rita Ora
Ed Sheeran
Meghan Trainer
Lil Yachty
Tory Lanez
PSY
Joel Embiid
Kris Wu
Bad Bunny
Peril: Wow.
Rainkeeper: Yeah..... we listen to like none of these people.
Kelp: Only six. Try to guess which ones!
Players: *picks*
Amber: I will fight anyone who tries to take Brendon Urie from me.
Deathbringer:.... Then come on snake, let's rattle.
Amber:.....
Deathbringer:.......
Amber/Deathbringer: *start dancing*
Nightflyer: *laughs*
Air: I don't get it.
Nightflyer: Because, "Come on snake, let's rattle" has two meanings. IT means let's dance, or you're challenging someone to a fight.
Air: Oooooohhhhh haha.
Tsunami: WHAT IS THE POINT OF ALL THIS?
Kelp: There's a song called Earth by Lil Dicky and it's got like 25 singers in it, so you all get to pick who's line you want to sing and the other canon characters you chose will fill in the rest.
Joy: So let's get started!
*all extra characters show up*
Starflight: WAIT! This is important.
Starflight: Who's getting stuck with the crappy Justin Bieber part?
Kelp: Darkstalker.
Joy: Definitely Darkstalker.
Nightflyer: *hits play on boombox*
Nightflyer: Also cue the language warning now.
Deathbringer: What up, world? It's your boy, just one of the guys down here. Well, I could be more specific. Uh, I'm a human, and I just wanted to, you know, for the sake of all of us earthlings out there, just wanted to say,
All: We love the Earth, it is our planet
We love the Earth, it is our home
We love the Earth, it is our planet
We love the Earth, it is our home
Darkstalker: Hi, I'm a baboon
I'm like a man, just less advanced and my anus is huge
Riptide: Did he just-
Glory: Hey, I'm a zebra
No one knows what I do, but I look pretty cool
Am I white or black?
Sunny: I'm a lion cub, and I'm always getting licked (Meow!)
Sunny: Hold on, what?
Clay: How's it going? I'm a cow (Moo!)
You drink milk from my tits (Moo)
Clay: Wait what?
Amber: I'm a fat, fucking pig
Amber:........I do not regret my decision in this song.
Turtle: I'm a common fungus
Winter: I'm a disgruntled skunk, shoot you out my butthole
Winter: Wh-WHAT?
Starflight: I'm a marijuana plant, I can get you fucked up
Starflight: Marijuana is like cocaine, right???
Joy: No.
Starflight: Aw.
Flame: And I'm Kanye West
All: We love the Earth, it is our planet
We love the Earth, it is our home
We love the Earth, it is our planet
We love the Earth, it is our home
We love the Earth
Stonemover: Ba-dum-da-dum-dum, ba-dum-da-di
We are the vultures, feed on the dead
Stonemover:.... I feel like this line was chosen for me for a reason.
Thorn: I can definitely think of one.
Swordtail: We're just some rhinos, horny as heck
Swordtail: Wh-why was that my line?
Cricket: I'm just a giraffe, what's with this neck?
Cricket: Why DO giraffes have such long necks?
Kinkajou: Hippity-hop, I'm a kangaroo
I hop all day, up and down with you
Tamarin: I'm an elephant, I got junk in my trunk
Tamarin: Wait, what do elephants look like?
Tsunami: What the fuck? I'm a clam!
Qibli: I'm a wolf. Howl!
Sundew: I'm a squirrel, lookin' for my next nut
Meerkat: And I'm a pony, just a freak horse, heh-heh-heh
But, uh, c'mon, get on (Yah)
Giddee-up, let's ride
Sunny: Okay.
Moon: I'm HPV, don't let me in
Moon: Wait WHY AM I THE STD? Y'ALL GOT SOMETHING TO SAY?
Willow: I'm a koala and I sleep all the time
So what? It's cute
Sundew: You are cute...
Coconut: We love you, India
Dune: We love you, Africa
Ruby: We love the Chinese
Deathbringer: We forgive you, Germany
All: Earth, it is our planet (It's our planet)
We love the Earth (We love the Earth), it is our home (Home)
We love the Earth, it is our planet (It is our planet)
We love the Earth, it is our home
We love the Earth
Deathbringer: I'm a man (Hello?)
Can you hear me? (Anyone out there? Hello?)
I've trudged the Earth for so damn long
And still don't know shit (What's going on?)
I hope it's not a simulation (Huh)
But these days, it's like we don't know how to act
All these shootings, pollution, we under attack on ourselves
Like, let's all just chill (Hey), respect what we built (Hey)
Like look at the Internet! It's cracking as hell
So what we got this land for? What we gotta stand for?
Love, and we love the Earth (The Earth)
Glory: Oh, yeah, baby, I love the Earth
I love this planet
Deathbringer: Hey, Russia, we're cool
Hey, Asia, all of you, c'mon
Every one of you from the plains to the Sahara
Let's come together and live
All: Hum-dum-dum-dae-dum, hum-dum-dum-dae-dum
Thorn: 우-우-우리는 지구를 사랑해요
Anemone: Amamos la tierra
Carnelian: 我们爱地球
Riptide: We love you, we love you
C'mon everybody, I know we're not all the same
But we're living on the same Earth
(We love you, we love you)
Fatespeaker: Have you ever been to Earth?
Peril: Everyone who's listening has been to Earth, Ariana
(We love you, we love you)
We're not making music for aliens here
Darkstalker: Are we gonna die?
Deathbringer: You know what, Bieber? We might die
(We love you, we love you)
I'm not gonna lie to you
I mean, there's so many people out there who don't think global warming's a real thing. You know? We gotta save this planet. We're being stupid
Glory: Unless we get our shit together now
All:........
Winter: I'm sorry, but WHAT THE FUCK DID WE JUST SING?
Joy: I don't know.
Rainkeeper: We honestly don't know.
All:.....
Glory: Now what?
Air: well there's only one thing left to do, really.
Peril: What's that?
Air: EVERYBODY DO THE FLOP!
All: *flops*