Air: Sooooo, how was everyone's Valentine's Day?
Seashell: Another depressing reminder of how unloved I am.
Air: Oh come on, Seashell, surely you got ONE valentine!
Seashell: Yes, I got ONE. It was an email from Walgreen's.
Air:.....Oh.....
Rainkeeper: What about you, Air? Did you have a nice Valentine's Day?
Air: Of course! Nightflyer always makes a ton of plans on it.
Nightflyer: Well no duh. I'm a hopeless romantic, and Valentine's Day is the day when you allow me to spoil you.
Air: It's the best day.
Nightflyer: Hell yeah.
Seashell: I hate Valentine's Day.
Rainkeeper: I know.
*players appear*
Air: Hey Umber?
Umber: Yeah?
Air: Remember how you told me you'd make Dean Winchester really gay so that Destiel would sail?
Umber: Ah, of course. How's that going?
Air: I think you tookit a little too far.
Air: Look.
Umber: Oh......
Umber: Still hot though.
Air: Change him back.
Umber: But.... tank tops....
Air:.........
Air: We'll talk later.
Turtle: So, what's today's dare, other then Umber making more people gay?
Umber: Oh, thanks for the reminder. Qibli, Winter, if you would.
Winter:......I hate you. SO MUCH.
Qibli: Don't hate on Umber, he was just releasing your inner self.
Winter: No he wasn't-
Qibli: *kisses Winter*
Winter:.......
Qibli: Still hate him?
Winter:.......No.....
Moon: THIS. THIS IS ALL I WANTED.
Joy: Speaking of Moon.
Moon: Oh no.
Umber: Are my gay powers needed?
Seashell: That might be helpful actually, yeah.
Umber: Yay! Moon you're gay!
Moon: Why....
Nightflyer: Turtle, we have some bad news.
Turtle: Oh no.
Rainkeeper: We're very sorry.
Turtle: I'm scared.
Air: I promise you, we will fix this as soon as we can.
Joy: We're so sorry.
Turtle: WHAT HAPPENED?
Rainkeeper: We need to break up Turtlejou for a little while.
Turtle: WHAT?
Kinkajou: WHAT? EXCUSE ME! I WAS NOT CONSULTED ON THIS!!!
Air: I know for a fact the females were not consulted about this.
Kinkajou: hELL NO. You can't take me from my Turtledove!
Seashell: Actually, we need you to marry Moon for three dares.
Moon: Um..... I'm sorry......WHAT?
Kinkajou: BUT-
Joy: No cuts, no buts, no fucks, no coconuts.
Kelp: That doesn't rhyme the way you want it to.
Joy: Don't care.
Kinkajou: But I don't WANNA MARRY MOON!
Moon: And technically I'm already married to Qibli AND Winter! I can't marry her too!
Nightflyer: Technically, yes you can. It's called polyandry.
Air: I thought it was called Mormonism...
Nightflyer: That's......
Nightflyer: Wait a minute.
Joy: Single he told me. Single my ass. Not only was he married, no. He had six wives. One of those Mormons, you know?
Kelp: Pop.
Joy: Six.
Kelp: Squish.
Joy: Ah ah.
Kelp: Cicero.
Joy: Lipschitz.
Kelp: DE DU DUUUU
Joy/Kelp: *violently sing along to the Cell Block Tango*
Rainkeeper:.....And this is why Kelp is here.
Air: Ah, a marriage. SEASON 7 TIME FOR A WEDDING!
Nightflyer: Did you ever stop and realize that if Sam Winchester and Gabriel get married, Sam's ex wife dated Gabriel's father, and Sam's father in law?
Air:....The more you think about how entwined the angel family tree is with the Winchesters, the more messed up it gets.
Kinkajou: I DON'T WANNA MARRY MOON! She's my best friend, yes, but TURTLE!
Moon: Aren't you technically married to Turtle?
Kinkajou: Yes.
Turtle: We got married in a pool of holy water.
Kinkajou: That was a fun day.
Nightflyer: MAWAGE.
Air: *starts giggling uncontrollably*
Nightflyer: IS WOT BWINGS US TOGEDER TOODAY. MAWAGE, THAT BWESSED AWANGEMENT, THAT DWEAM WIFIN A DWEAM!
Nightflyer: *puts colanders on Kinkajou and Moon's heads*
Moon: NU-
Nightflyer: BOOM! You're married. Tough shit.
Moon:.......DAMMIT.
Umber: JANET.
Moon: Oh no.
Umber: Come on , Carnie, be my backup.
Carnelian: Do I have to?
Umber: Hell yes, you're my bestie and I'm your Gay BFF.
Carnelian:....No....
Umber: YEP!
Umber: The road was long, but I ran it!
Carnelian: Janet.
Umber: There's a fire in my heart and you fan it,
Carnelian: Janet.
Umber: If there's one fool for you then I am it
Carnelian: Janet
Umber: Now I've one thing to say and that's-
*Starflight falls from the ceiling, high on cocaine*
Starflight: DAMMIT JANET.
Umber: I love you!!!
Winter: You do realize it's the wrong time of year to be referencing the Rocky Horror Picture Show, right?
Umber: There's never a wrong time to reference Rocky Horror.
Winter: But-
Umber: I'M JUST A SWEET TRANSVESTITE, FROM TRANSSEXUAL TRANSYLVANIA!!!
Winter: *facetalons*
Kinkajou: So Moon is my wife now.
Moon: Yep.
Kinkajou: By extension, does that mean I'm also married to Qibli and Winter?
Qibli: Three moons, I hope not.
Air: Oh hey folks. Since it was Valentine's Day.....
Air: WHAT'S THE FLUFFIEST MOMENT YOUR OTP HAS EVER HAD?